Chapter 1 Darkness

Darkness.

After my close encounter with that huge ass wooden log I found myself floating in endless darkness. Sigh… I guess I really did die. I check my body in order to confirm I’m not missing any body parts. Thankfully I’m still in one piece and even have my clothes on.

But damn, am I really dead? I don’t feel anything different than when I was alive. I don’t know for how long I was floating here but if this is all that afterlife have to offer then it will get boring really soon.

After an eternity that felt like a single second to me I notice a faintly glowing point of light in the distance. It looks like an exit from a long tunnel. Seriously? Light at the end of a tunnel? Well, at least it can’t get more cliché. Just as these thoughts were crossing my mind the light started to increase in brightness. I quickly cowered my eyes with my arms because it got so bright it would blind me if I looked at it directly.

I was still cowering my eyes when I heard a somewhat bored women voice.

“Take your number and wait.”

To my surprise, when I finally lowered my arms instead of endless darkness that surrounded me so far I could see a long corridor with a rows of peoples seated on chairs alongside the walls and a doors at the end. Right in front of me is a big desk with a bored middle aged woman that was staring at me from behind her glasses. She looks like a civil servant from a government office. It didn’t really heard what she said because I was still dazed from this sudden development. I was still staring at her when she said something again but this time with an angry tone.

“Listen here young man, take the number, sit on an empty seat and wait for your number to be called. You are blocking the queue.”

I glanced over my shoulder to see what queue she was talking about but all I could see was the darkness I was in until now. Not having any other option I take a small piece of paper from the woman and take the nearest empty seat.

On my right sit a not so bad looking blonde girl about my age so I try talking to her.

“Hello.”

“…”

…. She ignored me. Damn. But I won’t give up!

“Soooo… do you know what’s the deal with these numbers?”

“…”

I try talking with her again but she either deaf or she’s completely ignoring me again. Arghhh screw you! I’ll dub you Ice Queen from now on.

I take a look at the piece of paper with my number. It’s 41875922147. Jesus, just how long is that queue? Having nothing better to do I scan the peoples in the corridor. Everyone looks different. It’s as if someone was told to gather a representative of every race and nationality on earth. As I wait, every ten minutes or so a number is announced and someone make their way to the doors at the end of the corridor. Every few minutes someone emerges from the darkness, takes their number and sit on a chair. Most of them have the same blank look as the Ice Queen. I didn’t notice when but Ice Queen disappeared at some point. Finally a few hours later my number was called so I made my way to the doors.

I go through the doors and find myself in a small office with a similar looking desk and woman. She’s reading something and completely ignore me. After 5 minutes I get a little irritated.

“Anything interesting in that newspaper?”

Finally she rise her head and look at me.

“Hoh hooo. Looks like we have a lively one here”.

I don’t really know what she meant by this but at least she’s not ignoring me anymore. I’m a bit tired of all this waiting so I try to get some confirmation.

“So, am I really dead and this is some kind of afterlife or all of it is just some kind of dumb charade?”

She smirk at me and shuffle through the papers on her desk. After a few moments she picked one and start reading out loud.

“Number 41875922147, age 21, male , cause of death – logged to death.”

And thus I got a confirmation that I’m indeed dead. But there was one thing that bug me.

“What’s with this cause of death?”

“Who knows. I’m not the one who write it.”

She answer me such with a shrug. Damn it. She’s somehow pissing me off. I don’t want to waste more time here so I don’t argue.

“Ok. What I’m supposed to do now?”

She handle me two sheets of paper and say.

“Walk through the doors behind me and go to the room 304c to get form EC33B9. After you fill it go to room 9231.”

“… OK”

I don’t know what’s the purpose in all of this but somehow can’t bring myself to oppose her. I leave her office and find myself in a corridor similar to the first one but with more doors and peoples walking around. All of them had that blank look on their faces. I sigh and search for the room 304c. I have a feeling that it will take me a lot of time to get out of here. If ever. If I knew afterlife is like this I would try to stay alive a bit harder.

“…”

“…”

“…”

I don’t know how long it’s been but I’m starting to lose it. I spend all of my time walking from room to room doing this pointless paperwork. Go to room B to get a stamp. Get back to room A to fill a form. Go to room C to deliver a form. All I do is walking or waiting in a queue. Recently I catch myself walking on autopilot. I think there is a purpose in all of this but can’t really figure out what.

“…”

“…”

I dozed off again and I’m in an empty corridor. I don’t remember how I got here. There are only three doors here including the ones I got here through. One them looks a bit different them most but I know those are not my destination now. I walk towards the third doors when I hear something.

“…psssst… over here”

I stop and search for the source of the sounds. I never have heard someone talk here beside those clerks in the rooms. I take a few more steps and find an old man sitting between two chairs.

“ … hahaha … finally! Finally someone who isn’t brain dead.”

OK. That’s a bit creepy. This old man looks as if he’s on drugs. His eyes are bloodshot and he’s glancing constantly from side to side.

“Are you ok gramps?”

“OK? OK? Of course I’m not OK lad. And you are not ok either. They tried to wipe me but I won’t give in so easily. Hahaha. Oh noo noo noo. I won’t. They thought they won but it’s me who will win in the end.”

Did I said drugs? It’s more like this gramps went nuts. And I have to admit, he scares me a bit.

“Yeah. I also think you totally won sooo … see ya gramps.”

I try to leave him as soon as possible but suddenly he catch my leg and stops me.

“Wait! Where do you think you are going?”

OK. Now I’m seriously scared. Can I die a second time? I better not check. And so I muster all of my intellectual power and answer him.

“ … eeee … to get my stamps?”

“Hmmm. And when you fill all the forms and get all the stamps what do you think will happen?”

Hmm. What will happen I wonder. Nobody ever told me why I’m doing here what I’m doing. I guess I will go to haven or hell?

“I don’t know?”

“Well, I you don’t now I will tell you. Nothing will happen. You will be brain dead by the time you finish all his crap.”

“What do you mean gramps?”

“I guess you probably tried to talk to someone here so let me ask you this. Why nobody responded to you?”

I’ve indeed tried talking to them many times but nobody ever responded. I guess everybody here either can’t hear me or totally don’t give a shit about me. I was silent for a while so gramps answered his question himself.

“Because they are brain dead! Or more specifically they lost all of their memories. Why do you think you’re doing this pointless paperwork? You will end up the same as them!”

Jesus, this gramps really lost it. Beside can you really get brain dead from doing paperwork? I doubt it. I should leave him for his delusions here.

“It’s an interesting story gramps but I really have to go now”

“Wait! If you don’t believe me then let me ask you one last question. What is your name?”

Seriously? A question like this after all this tension building?

“Obviously my name is number 4187… wait! I mean my name is … my name is…. is …..”

Holy shit! I really forgot my name! Jesus Christ! Could this gramps be right? Wait, wait, wait. Let’s calm down. I could forget my name but I surly remember the rest of my life. … … … … Shit. I can’t remember anything up to my middle school times. Fuck.

“Looks like you already started to lose them lad.”

“Ok gramps. Let’s say I believe you. What will happen when I lose all of my memories?”

“That’s easy. You will end up here.”

“Here? By here you mean this corridor?”

“Yes.”

“Why here?”

“You see these doors here?”

I look at the doors that look a bit different than most.

“Yeah, what’s with them?”

“Those are the only doors here expect from the first room that no one ever come back from if he go through them. Beside only those that lost all of their memories go there.”

“Are you sure of this?”

“Listen here young man, I’m watching these doors longer then you can even imagine. I’m pretty sure of this.”

“Then why you won’t go there yourself?”

“Because someone have to oppose those bastards that try to wipe us and help guys like you.”

“That’s a bit unbelievable reason just so you know.”

“Hmphh. If you don’t want to believe me then fine. I can’t force you. If you don’t want to go there then don’t. I’m only giving you a choice.”

Hmmm. Should I listen to a mad gramps on drugs or should I do what I have been doing so far and lose my memories? Damn. Both of these choices are bad. But if I have to choose then I prefer to retain my memories. Hmmm. What to do?

“I don’t want to press you lad, but a worker will be coming here soon.”

“How do you know?”

“I said it to you already. I’ve been here for a long time.”

“Is that so? But it’s not an easy choice.”

“Take your time. You have about 20 seconds more.”

“What?! That’s short!”

Aghh damn it! I choose my memories. If that gramps is wrong then I will come back here and beat the crap out of him. I take my papers and head to the mysterious doors. On my way there I can hear gramps for the last time.

“Remember to put on that blank face as if you hadn’t have any memories.”

I make the most dumb face I can and enter through the doors. On the other side is an office similar to those I already been to. There are two women like in many of the other rooms. When they see me one of them come to me, take my papers from me and say.

“Wow. This one looks even dumber than most of them”

And fuck you too bitch. She takes a small piece of paper from the pile. It’s the one with my number I got when I first got here. She give it to the other woman and toss the rest to the trash can.

“Let’s see what we have here.”

She put in some kind of machine that looks like a small computer.

“Hmm. Admitted to the world NO2MM5387.”

Then she hits some keys on a keyboard and say.

“OK. All set. Send him.”

The other woman walk up to me and put her hand on my back. The next moment I found myself floating in a familiar darkness.

Shit.

********************************************************************************************************************

Back in the corridor the old man that was sitting between the chair stood up. All traces of madness disappear from his face. Few seconds later a woman come from the third doors. She walk to the old man and sigh.

“Did you sent on another mortal soul with its memories intact again, Boss?”

“Oh come on, can’t I have some fun from time to time? Besides I owed him one.”

She glare at him for a moment before relaxing again.

“Fortunately my shift ended exactly 12 seconds before this incident so it’s not me who will write a report about this.”

With those words the woman turns around and go back through the doors the young man come from.

The old man stare at the woman as she leaves and mutter quietly.

“... shit.”

He turn around and head to the third doors.