《Hero? I'm assassin, but that's the same right?》Black Goblin 2

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Now, let's talk about my daily life. First thing in the morning, or whatever it is now, I do what any monster would do, well sentient monster that is, not those dumb-di-dums here, that is hiding. Or stalking adventurers if you'd like. Or just plainly wander around the place in search of some loot, which was not yet taken by adventurers or dungeon. There are no wandering mobs, just stationary ones, which always spawn in the same spots. Well, that's on the lower levels, on the upper levels? Well, they wander in a strict pattern in somewhat large groups. Oh and there are not only goblins, but some rats, bats, spiders, caterpillars, frogs etc. Just your regular, friendly dungeon of noobility. I wonder why won't humans build a city or something. You know all these fictions where some wannabe heroes would start as some poorly dressed lad with few coppers to his name and some rusty sword?.. Wait... Poorly dressed? Check. Rusty sword? Check. Copper? Eh, don't have any. Right, back on topic.

My daily routine as follows. Rise and praise the illuminated celling, get out of my cave, go to the top floor, where the dungeon core is located, steal some tablets so no one would enter there and get killed by final boss, which is probably some goblin with sharp stick, so I can kill them and get some loot. Place tablets in the open, so I can ambush some adventurers, or place them in some crack and go down for the easy kills. I'm doing it mostly to practice my magic and combat abilities, so I don't fight in the open, or with strong targets. Relatively strong that is. You see, stats are the same for everyone, it's just difference in the bodies and equipment, except when some have some modifier or just tons of them. Especially the moron that comes here everyday and tries to enter the boss room, by smashing it all day long. And let me tell you, that moron has almost 50 and more stat points in all stats, besides luck and magical stats, but around 30 in willpower. I can't believe someone like that exists. Poor bastard has meager 1 in intelligence and 3 in magic kills monsters all day long, while being naked. As you might have guessed, I stay as far as I can from him. Also I stay as far away as I can from some criminals, not because they strong, mind you, just don't want to fight them, as you never know when more of them will show up. They're not that different from adventurers, but as they mostly sneaking around the dungeon it's quite easy to spot them. Oh right, dungeon is quite big, around 10 square kilometers for one floor, so they have quite a lot of room to kidnap, rob and kill other adventurers. They also have some sort of hideout in one of the secret rooms here, or rally points. Anyway I'm trying to stay as far away from them as possible, I don't want to be ganged up by them like last time I tried to sneak in the hidden room, first death is the most traumatic one.

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After some time of patrolling and killing stray adventurers, and looting them of anything they have on them, I go back to the 5th floor, eat some of their snacks and sleep. Then do the same stuff as usual, hide tablets, wander around, kill, eat, sleep. Boring life of a dungeon mob.

Not this day though. Today Smashy came with someone else in tow.

“Uh. I tried to smash door. Door strong. Can't smash.” (Smashy)

“Because it's a puzzle. See? It reads 'place the tablets on their rightful places'. All we have to do is find tablets.” I'm gonna call him riddler. Stupid name, but wharever. “You saw any tablets around here?”

“What tablets?”

“I guess not. Come on, we have to find them.”

What should I do? Place the tablets as bait and kill them? No, too dangerous. Talk to them? What am I, some sort of idiot that think any problems can be solved just by talking with your enemy? Hm... I'll just place tablets around the place, preferably with monsters guarding them. If they manage to beat boss, they might even find some sort of dungeon heart and remove dungeon entirely. Alright! The tablets will be set in the most guarded place of all... some random chambers.

-

Good news for today, Smashy and Riddler found them, and now they have placed them in the sockets, but...

“ARGH!!! WHO MADE SOMETHING AS STUPID AS THAT?!” yeah, I also laughed at it first time I saw the tablets. They had numbers on them [1], [2], [3], and [4]. “WE SEARCHED ALL DAY TO GET THIS?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!”

“We go? We beat boss, you calm.”

“I swear, I will never enter this dungeon again. NEVER!!!”

“Me too. Puzzles hard.”

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And so they left to the boss room, while I decided to paint the dungeon. But just as I was leaving 5th floor messege appeared

WARNING!

Dungeon core has been destroyed. Dungeon will cease to exsist in 3 hours, please remain calm and leave the area immediately. Or not and get yourself killed.

Guess Smashy decided to smash the core. Or Riddler, considering how he was pissed about running around the dungeon in search of the tablets. Whatever the case-

Dungeon bound effect dispelled.

And here I was wondering about it... so now I can escape, right?

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