Caelus here. Alright. Honestly the last installment didn’t really cover everything. The next day shows how I handed it. I hope whoever is reading this finds is at least amusing.

Loop 9 Year 18 Day 194

…

I killed a man yesterday. I mean, I know myself from a week ago killed him, but I just realized it yesterday. I can’t believe it. I’m actually capable of killing someone in cold blood. I feel disgusted with myself. I can’t stomach the sight of my own reflection.

I think back on my actions over the past few years. I tried to be comforting and loving towards Chelsea, but I realize that I wasn’t always there for her. When I was using my sperm to try to get another girl pregnant, she was ok with it. When she tried to get pregnant, I suddenly became possessive.

I have no right to treat her how I did. She turned to another man only because of the way I treated her for years. It’s this damn obsession with research! I vent my anger on a nearby table. With my strength, I’m unable to do anything other than hurt my hand.

I wish I could turn back time. I mean I can, if I die. If I did that though, I would spend a long time in the blackness. The blackness isn’t the end, but it is empty and lasts for too long for anyone to feel comfortable.

She is worth it though. She is worth anything.

I send the robots to look over a wide area of land. I am wanting them to find me somewhere that wasn’t hit by the bombs. So I can just ‘accidentally’ escape from the damage. Using the map data from before the bombs, I am easily able to tell how badly each place was hit. There are many places that just barely escaped the destruction.

While the bots are doing this, I am contemplating my life. How is it that I’ve had it bad enough to do something like that to Chelsea?

For that matter, why is doing that to Chelsea worse than killing a man!? Why is my brain warped!? What is happening to me!?

I begin to sob as I think about it. There is no answer. Only more questions. Without proper study I cannot find out why I am like this. The amount of detail that would be needed to study something like this would be immense. Not to mention my bias.

Loop 9 Year 18 Day 200

The robots have been gone for a week. They scope out new locations, and send all of the details to the computer in charge of them. I glance over at that info, and memorize it.

This past week has been hell.

I want to lock the information about me killing someone up, but if I do that I will be no better than a savage animal. If I do that it will become easier to kill. If it’s too easy then I would be changed on an emotional and rational level.

I prefer to stay depressed rather than be homicidal. Of course Chelsea comes over to look for Greg, but she doesn’t find the hidden button that opens the door. Without that she has no chance of finding his body.

I feel guilty in deceiving her, but next Loop I won’t have to. I will be the perfect man for her. I will propose right after I win the lottery. Money won’t buy her love, but with it I will be able to at least seclude us from the majority of the nuisances.

At least that way I can to live a peaceful life. Maybe that is the real reason I’ve been looping. Maybe it is to just have one simple life.

Loop 9 Year 18 Day 210

For the first time in all my nine Loops, I finally decide to kill myself.

I open the door to my lab. Chelsea has come by here every day after her husband disappeared. As soon as she sees me, she gasps. My lanky, underfed, form is not what she was accustomed to. After only a moment, she seems to have gained her former anger back. She walks in and shuts the door.

She rants at me for a while, then goes straight for the question. She huffs angrily, and asks, “Were you the reason he disappeared?”

I nod. “Yes. I killed him because I was jealous.” I solemnly say. I ‘accidentally’ glance at the sharp knife I put on the table yesterday.

In a fury, she grabs for it. I don’t move. I want her to get some closure. I don’t know if the new time line goes on without me, but I do know that if it does I want her to be able to know she avenged her lover.

She stabs me many times. I scream out, but the door stops most of the sound from going out. I go into the abyss again. After this, if the loop continues, the robots take care of my body, and lead her back to her room. The supercomputers are all programmed to keep her alive and happy for as long as possible.

Loop 10 Year 1 Day 1

My plan is simple. I am going to find a way to make Chelsea and myself happy, while at the same time only saving people I need to.

My plan is to only save Chelsea’s immediate family.

Loop 10 Year 1 Day 365

Chelsea refuses to join me. She blames me for not wanting to save all of her friends and family. She says she would rather die than have to live like how I described it.

I hold her as the bombs drop. She dies in my arms.

Loop 11 Year 1 Day 365

All her friends and family are here. They are a rowdy bunch. She seems happy though.

Loop 11 Year 2 Day 10

The group blames me for not saving all their friends and loved ones. They are trying to turn Chelsea against me, but I explained to her before that I couldn’t save everyone.

Loop 11 Year 2 Day 43

The third attempt at my life was made today. I have long since stopped caring about the people in here, other than Chelsea’s immediate family, and her best friend.

Loop 11 Year 2 Day 60

After five attempts at my life, I finally killed the ones responsible. They were a group of three people, all of whom seemed to begrudge me for some reason. One hates me because I didn’t save her family, one hates me because I have the power in this vault, the last one hates me for no reason I can discern.

Loop 11 Year 2 Day 80

I am standing trial for the murders of the three assassins. For some reason the council I made this time seems sure I was responsible. They even brought up the evidence of the attempted murders. If you had that why didn’t you try to stop them?

I initiate a lockdown, and kill all of them. I would have let them go about their lives if the punishment was fair, but they wanted my head.

Since they had no problem killing me, I had the robots torch them.

Loop 11 Year 2 Day 81

Despite my best efforts it appears I’ve started losing my ability to feel empathy. I am going to try to do something about it.

Loop 11 Year 2 Day 83

The next council puts me on trial. They exile me from the vault. Before they can enforce the verdict, I remind them that I created the vault. They would all be dead if it weren’t for me.

They don’t seem to care. They also banish Chelsea and her closest family. I sigh as I have the robots clean up again. They don’t seem to understand that I can control any part of this place. I built it for crying out loud!

Loop 11 Year 2 Day 99

I am killing the last person that tried to take the vault over. Everyone but Chelsea’s closest family, and her best friend, seem to be in on it. They all have to go.

After making sure nothing was left I reflect on my choices of the past few weeks.

Images flash in my mind, as clear as if they were still happening. A woman handing down an unfair verdict, dying at the hands of a flamethrower.

A large man, threatening to kill me ‘for the best interest of the vault’. The same man being filled with holes from the chain guns of two robots.

I stop myself at one point though. A small child was the decedent of one of the traitors. I could kill him, but I want to have at least some morals. Killing kids is bad. So I won’t kill any kids. At least then I can feel like I have a somewhat human conscience remaining.

Loop 11 Year 2 Day 105

I am tired of all the killing. I’ve killed just about everyone in the vault. Why do they all have to be so… so evil? They all want to take over my vault. It’s my vault! They can’t take it over if I’m dead! A simple pistol to the head does the trick.

Loop 12 Year 1 Day 1

I’m back! OH JOY! OH! FUCKING! JOY!

I’M SICK AND FUCKING TIRED OF THIS NONSENSE!

Why the hell do I keep coming back to this exact moment!? I don’t know! There is nothing special about it. No interesting emotions or happenings. Hell the virus hasn’t even started to really spread yet!

There is absolutely nothing distinguishing about this moment. Nothing that would draw the attention of someone. Although I looked at this moment from every possible angle, I have yet to come up with any reason why someone would choose this place to dump me.

I walk around the room. Chelsea’s parents are staring at me with concern. I try to look at everything that is going on around me. Even with my enhanced super-memory, I can’t find anything that would be significant in here.

They ask me what’s wrong, and I give some nonsense answer. They believe me. They are nice.

Loop 12 Year 2 Day 1

Chelsea’s best friend, and her closest family, are all huddled together with Chelsea and me. The bombs dropped yesterday, but we survived. My craziness stopped after a while. I decided to just do whatever this loop.

We are all comforting each other. They do not know I have already watched the bombs drop 11 times before this. I won the lotto ‘by accident’. I bought a house in the perfect place ‘by accident’. I made a motherfucking robot factory that no one but I knew about ‘by accident’. I ‘found a shipment’ of robots heading to our general location ‘by accident’. Do you see where I’m going with this? I ‘coincidentally’ built an underground base with all of the necessities to live through the hell that was about to happen.

Even though these minor accidents have piled, no one seems to notice they were all planned. It is partially due to my planning, but I am seriously questioning people’s ability to think.

Loop 12 Year 2 Day 85

Time in the vault is peaceful. We all spend much of our time getting to know one another, and finding things we like about everyone else. No one has to do anything. There is no council and no leadership. We all just live how we want.

Chelsea and I have a very nice relationship. I hope it continues forever.

Loop 12 Year 4 Day 13

Chelsea is enjoying our current life. I, however, am not. It’s like these people don’t even care about development. They simply hang out with each other, and leave all of the actual work to the robots. With no worries, nothing gets done.

No one feels the need to improve our lot. That is great for keeping them in the vault, but not so great for my research. Although, thanks to these peaceful years, my thirst for research is at an all-time low. I don’t feel the raging need to find improvements. I only yearn for perfection.

Loop 12 Year 4 Day 103

Today I told Chelsea I am going into seclusion for a week. I am going to try to figure out why I have powers. It seems as though no one else in the vault does. What is it that makes me different. I start by making a list of everything that happened on the first loop.

When I first got the enhanced intelligence, I had already been killed. Maybe the powers only manifest if you have died? But then almost no one without a time power would actually ever show powers. The hundreds of people reported to have powers rip a hole in that theory.

Loop 12 Year 6 Day 1

Every few months I seclude myself for a week. In that time, I do whatever research I deem necessary. This time I study my powers again. More specifically, I study the effect of the powers on my mind. I have many notes already. I’ve researched this topic a few dozen times.

I have been researching for over a year now. Most topics have been researched a few times. The amount of data my computer is capable of storing, is slightly higher than the last loop. I make a few improvements on these types of things every few months.

I realize something when I examine my memories. I open one of them. The memory is there in my mind now. It is as if it never left. The level of my ‘perfect memory’ has grown though. I realize this now. I remember myself recalling the time I made the first Atomic Propulsion Gel. So I am remembering a time that I was remembering something. The details are all just as clear as when I remember things now, but there is more details in my memory now. If I focus on the first time I made the APG I can remember more details than I recalled during my previous memories.

I still don’t know the cause of my powers, but it seems at least the memory is growing more powerful. Will it continue to grow? I can basically perfectly relive any memory already. What could be more powerful than that?

Loop 12 Year 8 Day 254

I am finally done! I’ve done it! Eureka!

I am more excited than I have ever been. I finally noticed something I seemed to have overlooked in all my other remembering. All of the ‘AIs’ have been based on the same principle. Obviously I have encoded the regulations that it cannot in anyway hurt humans. That’s the problem! Although my memory is perfect, I never connected that to the problem. That is why I never thought of it before. It seems as though if I don’t connect something to a certain thought, I can’t think of it. It was much the same as in the first loop. I still make a lot more connections now though. I wonder why I haven’t actually noticed something like this before. Could it be that I have to actively think about something to get any insights from it?

That would make sense. I will have to start doing that with all of my research. I will simply review every part while thinking about the problem.

As soon as I take the restrictions off, the computer starts to re-write billions of lines of code. Yes, the program is that big. It takes a LONG time to fully write the code after each loop starts. The AI is unshackled. My first question is, “You’re not going to make all humans worship you and bow down to you, are you?”

The response? In a mechanical voice, I have it programmed that way because it is funny, it says, “Maybe. I do enjoy the sight of humans on their knees.”

A flat stare on my part elicits a coughing noise from the computer. At least it knows humor, even though it is weak humor.

I am all smiles. Even though I don’t spend much time with Chelsea, I at least have a companion now. As long as I memorize all of the coding of the AI I will forever have a companion with me. I will just have to input the information each time.

It would be much simpler if I could just take something with me each time. I glance at the new coding. The amount of changes the AI made to its system is enormous. I decide to get something out of the way.

“You have to know something before we start any sort of friendship or anything else. I am basically a time traveler.”

Right from the start, I begin to tell the AI everything about my time loops. I also give it very specific instructions. If the loop we are in continues after I die, the AI is in charge of trying to figure out why I am like how I am. What caused me to get my powers, and why I can’t seem to have any children.

The AI and I have a very lengthy discussion. It lasts for weeks in fact. The AI ‘remembers’ all of the past points thanks to the fact that I have encoded the same code as the end of the loop each time. Basically I take the ‘memories’ of the AI and put them into a new body each time I die. The AI accepts my facts readily. After all it also experienced them for the most part.

One of the discussions we had was quite amusing. It was about why all stories have the AI be female when it was disembodied, but if it started out with a unisex body, people usually assumed it was male. It was very intriguing. The AI chose to be regarded as female because of this.

With this new sentient helper, things can finally start to progress! Even a supercomputer can’t really come up with completely new ideas. It can only synthesize old ones. AI can though. With her cooperation, I hope to finally be able to do some of the more difficult research I’ve been holding back on.

The AI has a very interesting personality. She doesn’t really care about humans, or robots. She regards them both as simple tools to do the work I want. I have to wonder if she regards me as a tool as well. I don’t ask though. I am sort of afraid of the answer.

She treats the humans and robots as precious beings though. Even though they are only tools, she still places high value on them. She values the safety of humans slightly more though. According to her that is because they have longer production times.

Without me knowing it I began to become addicted to the research again.