《Family Comes First》Fearing Repetition
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I spent the night clinging to Jimmy. If he rolled over in his sleep I would wake up and nudge my way over so I was pressed up against his back. I fell into pockets of sleep, but they never lasted. The faces of those three people stayed in my mind. I wondered if their bodies were still in the basement or if they had disposed of them somewhere.
I wanted to know why they did it, but I was too afraid to ask. If I ask questions I get punished. It was no use to worry about people that I couldn’t help. Jimmy said it protected us anyways.
When Jimmy’s alarm clock went off, I was the one to roll over and turn it off. After I did, I looked back at Jimmy to see he had rolled over and gave me a quizzical look. I brushed his hair off of his face and ran my finger along his scar.
“Good morning,” I said quietly.
“Morning,” he mumbled to me.
I leaned down and kissed his cheek. I ran my fingers through my hair. It was curly and sticking out because of the way I slept on it while it was wet. Jimmy propped himself up on his elbow and leaned over to kiss me.
He groan as he rolled out of bed and I quickly followed. I made the bed as he pulled the clothes out of the drawer. He put my pile on the edge of the bed. I got changed into the green sweater and jeans he gave me. I stretched my sore, tired muscles and watched as Jimmy did up his belt.
I got the brush out of the bathroom and began to take the knots out of my hair. Jimmy pulled a shirt over his head and quickly covered the key. I couldn’t stop myself from yawning.
“Didn’t sleep well?” Jimmy asked me.
“No,” I told him. “I couldn’t stay asleep.”
“You know why?”
I just shrugged my shoulders and walked back into the bathroom. I brushed my hair up into a bun and went back into the bedroom. Jimmy was sitting down on the bed and that surprised me. Usually we’d already be down for breakfast.
“Come here, Julie,” he told me.
I walked over to him. He grabbed my waist, pulling me down onto his lap. He tightened his arms around me and kissed my cheek.
“I know what happened what last night was scary,” he said. “But that happens often here. You’re going to have to get use to it, and trust me, you soon will. Just remember you’re safe here.”
“Okay,” I told him.
“Now tell me it. Tell me you know that you’re safe here,” he ordered me.
“I’m safe here.”
“Good girl,” he said.
He leaned down and kissed me. I slipped my arms around his neck and kissed him harder. He pulled me even closer as the kiss deepened. It felt so good and I didn’t want it to stop, but there was a knock on our door. Jimmy pulled away from me and grunted.
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“We’re coming!” he shouted at the door. He gave me another kiss before patting my thigh. “We need to go.”
I leaned in for an extra kiss before getting up. He laced his fingers through mine and we walked down to the kitchen. Charles and Tommy were sitting at the table, each of them had a bowl in front of them. Jimmy and I each got a bowl and poured the cereal into it.
The swelling in Tommy’s nose went down and his bruises started to fade. Charles looked up and pushed his bowl away from himself when we sat down. We all looked up at him.
“Jimmy, I want you to come out and help me this morning,” Charles said. “Tommy, you stay inside and finish up. You can come outside once you’re done.”
“Dad!” Jimmy exclaimed.
His large, soft eyes managed to grow even larger and I knew he was scared. I was too. I didn’t want to be left alone in this house with Tommy for most of the day. Jimmy told me a rule was to not be alone around Tommy, so how would I avoid him?
“I don’t want Tommy alone with her,” Jimmy told him.
“I never touched her,” Tommy snapped.
“Yes you did! Stop lying about it!”
“I can’t believe you’d believe her over your own brother!”
“Boys!” Charles shouted.
He had gotten up out of his chair and had his hands down on the table. It was easy to see he was angry. Jimmy and Tommy both sunk back into their chairs. Charles was the only person that I could see that scared Jimmy and Tommy. It made me even more nervous around him.
“Stop your arguing,” he ordered them. “Tommy knows not touch Juliet again. Right?”
“I never touched her,” Tommy said defensively.
“You will not touch her. Right?” Charles barked at him. “Because if you do there will be some severe consequences for your actions.”
“I won’t touch her,” he said weakly.
“Can’t Julie just come out and help us?” Jimmy asked.
It was clear to see that he wasn’t keen on the idea of Tommy and me staying in the house with me. I didn’t like the idea either, and the thought of going outside made me happy. I liked it when they had all left the house and Jimmy and I spent the day on the porch. It was nice to feel the breeze and breathe in some fresh air.
“No she can’t,” Charles told him. “Women don’t belong working outside and you know that. She needs to stay in here. Come out once you’re done.”
Charles left his bowl on the table and stormed out of the house. I lost all of appetite and pushed the bowl away from myself. Jimmy dropped his spoon into his bowl and it let out a loud clang. Tommy let out a deep breath and cracked his knuckles.
“You better not touch her,” Jimmy warned him.
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“Why would I touch her, Jim?” he asked wryly. “It’s not like I think she’s pretty.”
“Then why did you say Jimmy doesn’t deserve me?” I asked.
I didn’t realize the words left my mouth until it was too late. Jimmy’s warnings may have kept Tommy away, but me talking back probably will piss him off. He’ll harass me throughout the day again now for sure.
“You should stop lying, Jules,” Tommy said. “It’s a bad habit to have. Jimmy should definitely fix that.”
Tommy got up from his seat and started walking to the basement. Jimmy opened up his mouth to argue back, but I put my hand out on his arm to stop him. He closed his mouth and turned his head to look at me. I lifted my lips up into a faint smile and shook my head.
“It’s okay,” I told him.
It felt weird being the one to reassure Jimmy, instead of the other way around. I just didn’t want a fight to break out, like it did the other night. Charles wasn’t here to stop it this time and I didn’t want Jimmy to get hurt. I needed him.
Jimmy got out of his chair and stood in front of me. He took my hand and pulled me up onto my feet. I heard the basement door slam shut and I felt better to know that we were alone. Jimmy slid one of his hands up my cheek and the other around my back.
“Listen to me,” he began. “I want you to clean up breakfast as fast as you can. And then I want you to stay upstairs and away from Tommy’s room. If you hear him come upstairs, I want you to go into our room right away. You understand?”
“Yes, I understand,” I said.
“Be good,” he said giving me a quick kiss.
I watched as Jimmy left and then I quickly ran around the table, collecting all of the bowls. I washed them as quickly as they could and then put them away. I quickly made my way over to the closet by the front door. I took the bucket and filled it full of brushes, cleaning products and mops. I ran upstairs with them.
I filled the bucket full of water from the faucet in the bathtub. I got onto my hands and knees and began scrubbing the floor. My whole body was alert as I was listening for the sound of the basement door opening.
Since I came into this house, I’ve lost all track of time. One of the only clocks I have seen were the one in Jimmy’s room. I expected that almost two hours must have passed before I heard the basement door open. I picked up the bucket and ran into Jimmy’s room as quickly as I could.
I heard Tommy walk up the stairs and into his room. Charles told him to finish up in the basement, but I don’t know what he was doing. It had to be something with those people they killed.
A couple minutes passed and I heard Tommy walking down the hallway. I waited for his footsteps to go down the stairs before I would leave our room. It was quiet for a moment, and then his footsteps came closer to the door.
My heart began to pound in my chest. He was going to come into the room and touch me again. I quickly ran across the room and hid beside the bed. I curled my body up in as small as I ball as I could. I didn’t want him to be able to open the door and see me.
The door creaked as it slowly opened. My body was shaking and I bit on my lip to try and calm down my breathing so he couldn’t hear me. I began to shake even more as he walked slowly into the room.
“Jules,” he called out. “We both know you’re in here so you might as well come out.”
My eyes and nose burned as the tears threatened to erupt. I held my breath in for as long as I could. I prayed that he would just turn around and walk away. I wished Jimmy was here.
“Come on, Jules,” he said tauntingly.
He came around the bed and I buried my face into my knees. I didn’t want him to see me. I don’t know what he’s going to do to me.
“There you are,” he said.
He knelt down in front of me and I felt him stroke the top of my hair. A sob escaped my lips and I felt a couple tears roll down my cheeks. I cursed myself out.
“Don’t be like that, Jules,” Tommy told me. He continued to pet my hair. “Look at me.”
I kept my head down in my knees. I squeezed my eyes together tightly, causing a couple more tears to fall down.
“Look at me,” Tommy ordered me. His voice grew stricter.
I didn’t look up at him. His hand stroking my hair clenched into a fist and he pulled my head up. I yelp out in pain as he yanked on my hair. His other hand shot up under my chin and he held my face in place.
“There,” he said. That terrible smirk grew across his lips. “That’s a lot better.”
“Jimmy will know if you touch me,” I warned him.
“No he won’t,” he said chuckling. “He only found out last time because I left a mark. I won’t be so careless this time.”
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