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Dedication: WetBelle for the awesome cover on the side - thank you. :)

Any of you guys do trailers/covers or want to try and do one? If so, let me know! My email is Contacting me via email is the only way you will get a response as I hardly check my wattpad mail anymore.

Recap:

His fingers gently caressed my chin. He left a trail of soft kisses across my jawline and onto my neck. He tilted my head back and pressed his lips to my ear.

"You're the only one who can make me feel alive."

Sparks of electricity shot through my veins. I collapsed into bed and snuggled against him, loving every second of it. Eventually, I fell into a comfortable and deep sleep, my thoughts on Carter the entire time.

Tonight, would have to be the second most amazing night of my life.

I was dreading returning back to reality in the morning...

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After spending longer than I should have gazing at his peaceful, sleeping face with a love-sick smile on my face, I bailed. I must admit, I most likely broke my record in getting ready, as I was up and out of the house within twenty minutes. Once I had put a safe distance between me and the house, I sunk to the ground and buried my face into my thighs.

Last night was stupid.

Okay, so it was the best night I have had since my sixteenth birthday and I still felt giddy when I thought about his lips against mine, but it was still stupid. I was not the type of person to cheat on my boyfriend, and yet, I went ahead and did it. Even though I had the same thing happen to me a year ago and it had crushed my heart and ruined the best thing I had in my life.

I was a stupid, stupid girl.

I realise I'm over-using the word stupid, but that's the only word that feels adequate enough to describe myself right now. The headache, sore throat and exhaustion probably didn't help brain processing either.

Guilt hung heavily in my chest as I took a moment to be ashamed of myself. I had to tell Aiden and I had to tell him today. I had to tell the boy who loved me and would do anything for me, that I had such little respect towards him that I cheated on him. Not just one little kiss that meant nothing, either.

I was a horrible human being.

School loomed over me and a feeling of dread spread through my veins, the closer I got. I was never particularly thrilled to be here, but today even more than usual. Slowly, my body came to a stop as I took a moment to mentally prepare myself for what I had to do. I didn't have a speech prepared. I was just going to tell him what happened and I was sorry. What's done is done and there was no going back.

With my mouth dry, eyes stinging and head hanging, I dragged my feet through the entrance. I wandered over to our usual spot and he wasn't there. Sweeping my eyes through the area, I realised he mustn't be here yet. I fumbled for my phone and retrieved it from my pocket. My heart felt as though it dropped into my stomach.

'Hey, I'm going camping for a few days and won't have reception. Sorry about the short notice, I wasn't going to go but decided to last minute. Talk when we get back? Love you. X'

Well that's just great.

Reluctantly, I dialled his number, hoping he hadn't left already. Straight to voice mail. The same thing happened the second time. Sighing, I ran my fingers through my hair. Of course this would happen to me.

"He's gone camping." a voice said behind me.

My head whipped to the right, so fast I may have got whiplash, upon hearing Mercedes' voice.

"Oh really? I didn't realise my boyfriend had gone camping. But I know I can always rely on you to fill me in on everything he's doing. Thanks for keeping such a close eye on him." I spat, sarcasm dripping from my voice.

She stared at me, startled. "I didn't mean to-"

"Save it." I pushed around her and strode towards school. I only made it a step in before the bell signalled loudly, thank God.

Now I was more confused than ever with what to do. In one way, I want Aiden to break up with me, so I don't hurt his feelings (more than I already have), so I can move on with Carter. But then again, Aiden does make me happy and I sort of don't want to break up? Also, I have the nagging voice of letting Mercedes be with him but she really gets under my skin. Seeing them together infuriates me so I don't want to do that either.

This was way more drama then I wanted right now.

My phone vibrated and I hastily grabbed it out again. Unfortunately, it wasn't Aiden. It was mum just asking me how everything was going and to ring her when I got the chance. It was nice, but I still hoped it was Aiden, telling me we needed to talk. Or that he loved me no matter what and nothing could break us.

It's sad that I don't even know what I want anymore.

"You do realise the bell rang about three minutes ago?" his smooth voice cut through my mental debate.

I jumped in surprise, not noticing he had crept up on me. I tried to avoid staring at him, but the brief second I had, his appearance made my throat go dry. He looked amazing, as always. Last night's memories burned my mind and made me suddenly flustered.

"Crap."

"About last night..." he trailed off, almost nervously.

Carter, nervous? That's new.

"I'll talk to you about it later."

I doubted that I would, but it was a solid excuse not to undergo the conversation now. If we got into it, I wouldn't be making it to class anytime soon.

"I just-"

Again, I walked away as someone was trying to tell me something. I made it to English without a detention, which was the only good thing that's happened today.

Was the universe trying to let me know I shouldn't break up with Aiden? This camping trip came at an extremely inappropriate time. Or maybe it was appropriate? Should I think everything through before I break it off with him? Should I just tell him everything and let him decide? Surely he would have to get rid of me after this, right?

I rubbed my hands over my face, groaning.

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I disturbing you Ms Adams?"

"What?" I asked, blinking back into reality. I then realised that my groan was very load, causing heads to swivel my way.

"I beg your pardon." she corrected.

"What?" I repeated more slowly this time.

"I'm not in the mood for your rudeness today, Lacey." she said, irritated. "Pay attention or leave. I don't care which one."

Sighing deeply through my nose, I dropped my gaze and continued reading along with the class. I needed to focus on my school work, not my teenage drama. Soon enough, my mind wandered and I was gazing out the window, pondering about my life once more. I vacantly stared at the large tree which was perched in the centre of the ground. Aiden and I often lounged underneath it, seeking its shade. If I did break it off with him, I would miss our lazy hangouts there. I would miss him running his hand through my hair...

"Lacey, could you read the next paragraph?"

"No, I'm good." I replied automatically, not even processing what I said, unable to drag my eyes from the tree.

"Grow up Lacey, you're a senior now. If you don't want to learn, then just go. Stop disrupting everyone else."

Grow up Lacey. Her words stuck to me, although I'm unsure why.

"Saying no to reading something, which doesn't have any relevance by the way, is not disrupting the class. You stopping and making that comment is what has disrupted the class." I snapped. I blinked and sat still for a second, not having expected those words to come out of my mouth. By the look on Mrs Caden's face, she didn't expect it either.

She stared at me for a moment, irritation evident on her face. She sighed and clicked her fingers at the door.

"Just go."

"Gladly." I retorted, suddenly annoyed at this whole situation. School sucks.

Snatching up my stuff, I stormed out. My cheeks were flushed from anger as I jammed my things into my bag. I muttered some profanities under my breath. Without bothering to wait for her to come out and lecture me, I just left. I didn't need to deal with this today. My mind was too preoccupied.

Okay, so my attendance level is beginning to dwell, but until my parents come home and I put much-needed distance between Carter, I couldn't really care less. My world will settle back into its usual routine soon and I will be fine.

I hope.

So, I ran. I ran hard and I ran fast. My sides were aching, my legs burning. I only stopped when I found it difficult to breathe. Leaning over, I rested my hands on my knees, my chest heaving. Right here, right now, I wish I could dig myself a hole and bury myself into it.

Running was my escape from life. It was only temporary, but it helped me feel as though I was somewhat sane. Although anyone watching me would probably think otherwise.

My old, favourite song 'Wake me up, when September ends' by Greenday suddenly had some relevance in my life.

This was going to be a long few days.

***

A long few days was an exaggeration. The amount of time I have spent couped up in my room, repeating Prison Break over and over again was ridiculous. My eyes just had to rest on Carter and tingles began in my toes. And spread through my entire body like I had been lit on fire.

Groaning with frustration, I ran my fingers through my hair. This much stress, would not be good for my cardiac system. I need fresh air. Emerging from underneath my blankets, I scrambled to my feet. I listened for Carter, but was only met with his blaring music. I wasn't going to be able to hear his footsteps over that.

Edging out of my room silently, I padded across the hall towards the stairs. I smirked when I thought I had made it. Too soon.

"Lacey-"

As if his voice triggered my feet, I bolted down the stairs and slammed the door behind me. I pressed my forehead to it, wanting nothing else to do except punch a hole through it. While my mind was processing ways to inflict damage on myself, I didn't realise someone was behind me.

"Er- Lace?"

I jumped about a metre in the air, whirling around, coming face to face with my boyfriend. I sighed in relief and pulled him to me. I buried my face into his chest and wrapped my arms securely around him. I had never been so glad to see him. Except, I had to tell him the worst possible news and I may never see him after this.

Oh, the irony.

"Hey," he laughed, hugging me back. He removed his arms and gave me a lope-sided smile. "What's up?"

His kind voice put me over the edge. Suddenly, I burst into tears. Not just silent tears rolling down my cheeks. Giant, chest-wracking sobs violently bursting through my body.

"Woah," he exclaimed, cupping my face with his palms. He bent so he was eye level with me. "What's wrong?"

"I am a horrible human being and the worst girlfriend you could possibly ever ask. You deserve s-so much better. I-I-I'm so sorry." I stammered like an idiot. I pulled my face from him and cried harder, if even possible.

"No you're not?"

"I am. Honestly. You don't understand."

"Help me to." he said softly, making things even worse.

I wanted him to be mad. Angry. Throw things. His soft, gentle nature was making this much harder than it already was. I grabbed his hand and pulled him after to me. I sat on the steps, hastily wiping at my cheeks. He was silent as he waited for me to speak.

"I don't know how to say this, so I'm going to say it straight-forward. Okay?"

"Okay..." he trailed off, nervously rubbing the back of his neck.

"I cheated on you." I stated bluntly.

Silence.

It was deafening. I gulped, burying my face into my hands.

"Carter?" he asked in a quiet voice.

"Yes."

"Was it just a kiss?" he asked even more quietly.

It was my turn to be silent.

He raised his hand to his face. I didn't dare look at him. I couldn't bring myself to. We sat in silence for a long time. Eventually, I peeked a glance at him.

For the love of God, he was crying. I lost it.

I cried. He cried. We cried together. Over what I did.

"My God, will you shut up!?" Carter yelled, banging the door open. "It is a bloody sob fest out here. This isn't a charity house. This isn't a home for the lost and deprived. This is my house. Get the bloody hell out or shut up before I-"

Aiden was up like a strike of lightening had struck him. His fist was projected into his face before I could blink. Carter cried out in shock. Aiden pulled him towards us before slamming his back into the wall. He kneed him in the stomach, before Carter fought back.

Carter grabbed fistfuls of his shirt and threw him, literally threw him off the porch. A strangled cry tore from my throat as Aiden landed in a painful sprawl on the cement. Carter pushed past me to go at him again but I reefed him back. He shoved me away and I slapped him. My hand stung and his face was red. He staggered to the side and I pushed him. He fell hard backwards and I didn't stop to watch. I jumped down and frantically ran my hands over Aiden.

"Are you hurt? Are you okay?" I asked in blind panic, my hands hastily prodding his body.

His hands were red raw and his knuckle split. He jerked his hands away. Hurt washed over me. I deserved it. Instantly, I stopped and pulled back. Of course he wouldn't want me touch him. Not after what I did.

He leapt to his feet and I followed, at a much slower rate.

"I hate you."

At first, I thought his venomous words were directed at me and I almost crumbled. But his gaze was locked on Carter, who was still sitting, hastily wiping at his blood-soaked face.

"I hate you so fucking much," his sentence didn't finish as he screamed in rage. This was the first time in my life I had heard Aiden swear. "You toy with her like you toy with every other girl at school. You're such a jerk. I hate you. I hate you so damn much. I can't stand to even look at you."

Carter glared back, but didn't utter a word. Which I was thankful for. Aiden's eyes then swivelled towards me. I took a step back.

"And you." he said, his voice level and low. "I thought you were better than this."

A strange sound left my lips. I can't quite describe what it was, but embarrassingly enough, it happened. He turned and walked away from me. He could have said anything to me, and I would have taken it head on. Those seven words, were enough to undo me.

If only he had said anything else. Because he was absolutely right.

Without looking back at Carter, I took off towards my car. I was in no position to drive but I had to get away. Anywhere, away from him. So, I went to the only place I could think of.

Our cubby.

***

It had been a long time since I felt the need to come here.

I sat on the front, leaning back on one of the railings. Just being here, I instantly felt an overwhelming sense of security and comfort. The amazing memories I had here was enough to keep me sane. Although the memories were with the person I was trying to get away from.

I had no Mercedes.

No Carter.

No Aiden.

Sure, I had other friends, but they were just people I hung out at school and parties. We were friends because we went to school together. Not because we're all that compatible. For so long, I've been wrapped and consumed in Carter Williams, I've ignored everyone else.

I was able to break free from that and socialise amongst a new group. Aiden and his friends. They were great. Not the most fun people, but they were nice and I got along with them fine. I guess I won't be spending much time with them anymore.

I literally had no one. Not even my parents were here.

Although this sounds sad, I didn't actually care all that much. I made the decision long ago that I didn't need many friends and I now had to stick with it. I had myself, my sanity (kind of), and a long life ahead of me.

I need to get out of this town and away from Carter. That is the only hope I have, to becoming normal. To live a normal and healthy life, without him.

Even after everything, the thought of being away from him brought a dull ache to my chest. I sighed and closed my eyes. I was exhausted. I have a good life, don't get me wrong, but the people in it aren't so good. Or the decisions I made with these people, rather.

I sat there, pondering about my life. I was tempted to hop in my car, drive until I had no petrol and let myself be away for a while. But no. I let myself come back to the very place I should be avoiding. Anything to do with Carter was trouble.

Lying back, I let my eyelids close. I focused on breathing in the fresh air. I'm not sure how much time passed, but I didn't remain alone. His footsteps could be heard but I didn't move. It remained silent for a while before I eventually peered up at Carter who sat at my feet. The blood was gone from his face, but his eye had a tinge of purple around it already.

However, he didn't seem as calm and collected as he usually was. I stared at the mark on his face that was already beginning to swell.

Must have been a good hit.

"I'm sorry."

Reluctantly, I sat up. I didn't respond.

"For everything. Not just today."

My heart rate began to pick up. For so long, I have wanted him to say sorry. And mean it. Was he really about to, after all this time? I sucked in a breath as he ran his hand restlessly through his hair. He actually looked nervous. For the second time today, I made him nervous.

He turned and looked at me dead in the eyes. "I am honestly sorry for everything. You're the most beautiful and amazing girl in the world. I let you slip through my fingers. There are things about that night that you do not know, or understand. And when you're ready, I will tell you. God, I'm so sorry Lacey. For that night. For this past year. I have gone out of my way to cover the hurt I feel from not being close to you. To cover the guilt I feel over what has happened. I love you. I always have loved you and I always will. I screwed things up, I know. I honestly can't tell you how sorry I am. I hope one day, we can move on and you can forgive me, for all that I have done. I have wanted to say this for so long, but have been afraid. It scares me to think you actually hate me. That deep inside, you actually will never forgive me. That things will really never be the same. You don't understand how much it hurts, to see you with him. With Aiden. Every day I had to see that. To see you with him. It was like I didn't even matter. That's why I am with so many girls. They're all attempts to get me over you. To distract me. No one will ever be able to replace you. No one, will ever mean as much to me, as you do."

My mouth was open as I gazed at him.