call me pennywise, hell even call me bozo.

either way i was a clown.

"you missed me?" fezco pulled me in closer. i felt disgusted after having sex with him for multiple reasons.

"no, i've been figuring out life without you or michael." i admitted, "speaking of, how is he?" i raised up placing my shirt back on my body.

fez reached the end of my bed leaving his back turned towards me. "not sure." he replied quietly so i knew he was lying.

i placed my arm around his neck putting him into a playful headlock, "don't lie to me." i laughed but he quickly pushed me off of him.

his elbow hit my stomach pretty hard.

i grunted in pain trying not to be a baby about it.

"oh shit i'm sorry. i- i forgot." he continued blabbing on, but the minute he did that i felt the baby move. i placed my hand on my stomach.

he moved more and more.

without any words i felt different all i could do is cry.

"i didn't mean to hurt you ryder." everything about him had changed it's like he was upset about something. the sex wasn't bad so i don't know at this point.

i wiped my tears, "no, it's not that noah just moved for the first time."

"noah?" fez's voice softened.

i locked on to his electrifying blue eyes that made me feel how he did the first time. "i named him noah. i didn't think that yo-"

"no, no that's okay. i like it." he smiled back.

dismissing myself from our moment i made my way to the kitchen for food. "what's this?" i seen a few brown bags on the bar.

ashtray smiled, "axel brought us breakfast." turning back to look at fezco frowning. "this smells amazing." i ended up smiling myself at axel's kind thoughts.

"i'm gonna go tell him thank you." i made my way to the corner house. his wasn't much bigger than mine, but it was obvious he took care of it.

i knocked a few times before he opened the door shirtless. i forced myself to make eye contact, but i couldn't help myself.

he worked out, had his entire body tattooed and looked beyond attractive.

"good morning beautiful." he just woke up and already had me in my feels. "good morning. i just um wanted to say thank you for breakfast." i blushed.

"i'm sorry?" he smiled.

"the breakfast- um, i just woke you up, didn't i?" he shook his head in confusion. ashtray set me up for failure.

"i'm sorry, ashtray lied and said you brought breakfast." i felt like an idiot now. "no, that was not me, but let me take you for dinner?" he raised his arm above him leaning against the doorframe.

"i dunno.." i hesitated thinking about how fezco would react.

he smiled, "if this is about your baby's father-" "it's not. i'm just not sure if you can handle me for more than one hour." i lied.

"i'll be there at 7, ryder." axel grinned before i walked away in full embarrassment.

i walked back inside planning my revenge against ashtray.

they were both at the table eating the food.

"i'm gonna get you back." letting him know what he had coming to him. "i was thinking you can show me around later." fez spoke to us.

"that's all you, ashtray." i plopped a hash brown into my mouth. "why can't we all go?" he instantly replied back.

"i'm going out for dinner." i spoke a little lower hopefully he wouldn't make anything out of it even though it really wasn't his business.

fez moved his food away from him, "really? with who?" he questioned.

i picked up the rest of my food and went to my room but all he did was follow me.

"i know i messed up ryder, but please don't do this." he begged me. "you lost me, fez. i'm sorry, but i will compromise things with you for our child. that's all."

he still had a chance with me, but he wouldn't know that.

"don't play with me." everything about him became dark and mysterious. i knew what he was capable of and i didn't want any problems. "fez, it's not like that. okay? he's literally just a friend. stop!"

he wrapped his hand seductively around my neck bringing his mouth closer to my ear.

"you're still mine forever especially because you're holding my child. if i have to kill axel for you to realize that then so be it. remember, you chose this."

his words sent chills down my spine.

i believed every single word he told me.

axel is too precious and innocent to get wrapped up in my mess. "fine, but remember you chose to hurt me knowing how much i've been hurt."

fez looked as if he wanted to say something but i continued before he could get anything out.

"you planted your seed in me, fine. i know that it's killing you on the inside that all you'll ever be to me from here on out is a dick appointment. all you'll ever be to me is my child's father. knowing someone else will be touching me after i'm no longer pregnant is fucking you up in the head. right?"

my words hurt him because he pushed me against the wall, "look ryder, be careful with what you say to me." he tried the threatening scheme.

i wanted to hurt him like he hurt me.

"the way that axel kissed me, or the way his hands felt my body would of really pissed you off fez."

i flinched as he punched the wall right next to my head. he walked away then lowered himself to my level.

"you're testing me but it's not going to work. i fucked up, i'm sorry. dress pretty tonight." fezco kissed my forehead and walked out.

i wasn't sure if i wanted him to come back or if i wanted to go through with the freedom now that i had it.

i slid down the wall until my knees met my chest. looking down i was taken back by the blood dripping on my legs.

i looked around from where it could be until i felt my nose. i coughed that was felt deep into my chest making me feel super weak.

making my way to the restroom i continued to cough with only realizing i was coughing up blood.

i stumbled to the room with the boys, "h-help i'm bleeding."

fezco ran to my side to catch me before i fell over.

"i got you baby, don't worry." he reassured me.