Chapter 7

Sleepwalker, Dreamwalker

My dreams have been more vivid and realistic and reality has been more dissociative and faker. Then, I had a sign that connected to a pattern. It is 1:53 PM and my father took me outside to buy me some coffee which he promised to if I come with him to go to the doctor. As I walked outside, and went to town with him, I saw and felt everything was just a dream. And last night, I vividly remember every single detail of it rather than having to perceive this reality. I used to write 282,000 words worth of content for this one novel about my dream walking episodes. As where dreamwalking is something I found in an occultic book, meant to teach fledglings of this new age of vampires how to at least use their weak powers and master it. It had none of what I already learned throughout my decade and a year of being a vampire. However, it did have some content that I never knew about, which helped me a lot as an experienced vampire to gain more knowledge and abilities.

Dreamwalking is simply to have your mundane form which is your physical human body to be put to the alpha stage of deep sleep as your soul travels across places with a certain limit of how far and how long depending on your mastery of it. Then you do the next step which gives you the awareness of your astral surroundings but lets go of the fact you left your body, as your body is completely vulnerable. That is why vampires who sleep in the day are likely to get killed easily and are hard to wake up.

It is like astral projecting, except your body is asleep rather than having to be at the theta stage of meditative trance. Then, I managed to master dreamwalking to the point that I can be barely conscious of my surroundings to protect myself while my astral body has its own physical form that is my doppelganger.

I’ve done so much of that while I was auto-writing books whilst highly, if not, extremely (not exaggerated) caffeinated in order to help me focus on my astral self to keep moving forward. This was back a year ago starting two years ago in November and managed to keep myself half conscious during February of 2021. Then, it made me dissociate to the point that it is 24/7, and I have more vivid dreams that are more realistic than reality itself. Then, I finally gained the sign. I was playing ‘osu!’ in the daytime, right? And what happened was I had a song that I never knew it’d been there before. As a rhythm game player, I would love to beat every song and their levels.

As I started to play halfway through, it started the echoing lyrics, “This is a dream…” then I started shredding the keyboard and drifting my mouse all over the desktop until I finally got to achieve an SS rank, which is the highest, and it was modded with silver.

I had a revelation… that this daytime reality is none but a vampire’s dream yearning for human life and sunlight where I used to be happy, as if I was trapped in a house because it matches being trapped inside a coffin during the nighttime sleep of the true reality. Thus, having my “dreams” in the nighttime where I go around vamping out, feeding, socialising with other humanoid and non-humanoid creatures of the dark, going to places and terrorising people who wronged me. That is until I realise now that I am or may just be dreaming this daytime reality, and the true reality are the dreams of nighttime. Which makes sense because all of my dreams are nighttime, that is when I am truly awake.

No wonder why dreams are longer than the fast travelling pace of daytime. It is 6 AM then by a glimpse turns to 5 PM and I have to go do the chores and go to bed after doing my mundane things.

So, none of the hours of daytime that I’ve spent suffering from depression and other comorbid mental disorders never happened at all, and they never mattered to begin with. I just…

I don’t know anymore, to be truthful with you.

***

My current desires are just caffeine and nicotine. I got both of them. I keep getting more sales for my books. So, I indulge in them, yet, even if they may fill the empty void in my soul, nothing truly makes me happy. It’s what all I ever wanted, nothing more if I were to be honest. I don’t want riches, women, alcohol, or anything else. I don’t want luxurious cars, or a dream home. I just want coffee and cigarettes, that’s it. And I still feel empty inside, all hallowed up inside, thinking to myself… is this what life really has all to offer? I thought to myself for a moment, and thought to myself that my undead life is everlasting, immortal and eternal. I don’t want to get bored for the rest of my life. Now with this mindset, I was gluttonous for more things, even though I have no other desire, other than the ones hidden in my mind.

No matter how satisfied I am with overindulgence, nothing truly makes me happy. Especially when I had too much of everything I wanted within a day, finally resting at night, and waking up to the nightly reality, where I jump from rooftop to rooftops, lurking in the shadows, and preying on the weak.

My new desires with the non-content life I have makes me gluttonous to things that aren’t even in the material world, and are hidden away from my mind that even I don’t know them. But I have this feeling that I must have such a thing. Whatever desire that I don’t even know what it is to myself, I must have it! I will do what it takes, no matter what or who I sacrifice, I would never be happy but to have it.

That is until I realised it was blood all I ever needed. It is life, I want more of that crimson nectar that runs through the veins of the innocents. And I want to overindulge into drinking so much of it, like a drug, my sweet, bittersweet dopamine drug…!

I just couldn’t get enough of it! I want more! MORE BLOOD!