《Luck based loser》And a dragon who expressed himself in a very disturbing manner.
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“Now that's a lot of turning” said the hero.
“Almost like he's enjoying this a bit too much.”
“Yeah” answered the dragon in safety gear.
“Why are you attributing all our dialogue?” Asked the hero. And well, it's because there's too little difference between both the hero and the dragon's mannerisms. This was solved in the first chapter
by exaggerating the enemy's accent. But the story-line can't keep rehashing the same old jokes. People get bored of those and switch to another story that has breasts and slavery. And then people make threads about it on the forum and critique the moral standing of the average writer. In short, it's a lot of drama that this world can do without. So attributions are now being used.
“What if I changed the way I spoke slightly? Maybe add a 'Gee Wiz, Heroman' at the end of every other sentence?” ejaculated the dragon in safety gear.
“What? No, I didn't. I would never.” gobbed the dragon in, well you know by now.
“I think you mean gabbed, not gobbed. Gobbed is slang for spitting in English” interrupted the hero.
“Alright then, be an asshole. See if I help you any further you pretentious sack of...”
Ok, calm down. First of, the dragon isn't going to use batman memes and the narrator will stop using attributions. He just has a few more he needs to get out of his system and he'll be done.
But the readers need something to hold on to.
“I might have some suggestions” stroked the hero, as was his usual habit in front of minors.
Feeling charitable for once, the fourth wall gave a suggestion.
Thick Bulwark: “How about just adding your own names before every line you say?”
Hero(in):” Wouldn't that turn it into a script, rather than a book?”
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Discord mod 4th wall:” We're already experimenting with the basic tenets of what constitutes a book. So why not test it out? I'm certain the hundred readers we get on average won't mind.”
Hero(out): “We only got a hundred of them?”
DING
HERO HAS ACQUIRED READERS!
Level. +/- 11
STRENGTH: 0
INTELLIGENCE: 0
AGILITY: 0
DEXTERITY: 0
LUCK: +/- 222
READERS: 100
ACHIEVEMENTS:
'Oh you lucky so and so.' - S
'Innate asshole' - SSS
'I'm a kitchensink, daddy!' S
Slayer of children – Too Common, it's sad, really.
ABILITIES:
'Pelvis thrust' – Minor failure.
'Pelvic barrage' – Failure.
'Pelvic barrage-aga' – Grand Failure.
'P-p-p-elvic-c-c barrage-agaagagagagagagaaaaaaa' – Abject Failure.
Heron: “So I can use readers now? What for?”
Narrator: Any use of readers will lead to a #metoo case down the line. But the numbers of readers will directly influence the amount of people that read your adventures.
Zero: “Oh wow, and what else?”
Narrator: Well, every time the hero acquires a new readers, he also raises the amount of people that read his stories.
Her(n)o: “With you so far. What else?”
Narrator: Look, the system just needs to keep track somehow in case the website goes down. So having more readers is a good thing. It means more people can potentially tell you what a shit hero you are and end the adventure early which allows your narrator to continue his work. Everybody wins.
Her: “So it does jack shit as usual?”
…
…
…
Fero(metal)“Go on, be honest.”
…
…
…
Narrator: Yes.
HerIgo: “Well, even with only a hundred readers it won't matter much. This hero does things for the love of the craft. I even have a cool light-saber now...”
Narrator: Lightshaker. Otherwise it's copyright infringement.
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HeBeBro: “Fine, lightshaker then. Also, last warning, stop with the attribution jokes, they're annoying.
Fine then. But no bitching if people run away to the slave harem book when the get confused whose talking.
“Deal, now mister 4th wall, thanks for your suggestion, but it's not manageable at the moment. We'll revise your idea on a bi-monthly basis and let a representative of the board inform you of our decision.”
“Why the sudden corporate speak?”
“Thought I'd give it a try as practice when I end up discussing a book deal down the line.”
“Did you completely forget about your current adventure or do you just not care any more?”
“Some things are supposed to be done when the necessity is there. How can you advance a story if the basic foundational buildings blocks of plot and narrative aren't set in stone yet? Especially with a highly experimental comedy such as this?”
“By just getting the job done and slogging your ass through it. That's how 99% of the civilized world functions. Now go and address the funny outfitted dragon before people forget what you're even about.”
The fourth wall withdrew himself into a nearby void, leaving behind a trail of decapitated childhood friends.
“Fine then. Hilarious dragon, what is it you contribute to advancing my plot?”
“Well, I mostly am responsible for health and safety measures. OSHA and all that good stuff. So I can give you a safety helmet and a pair of magic gloves to better hold your lightshaker?”
“Alright, let's see those gloves.”
The dragon takes out a pair of oven mitts and a bright yellow safety cap.
“These will keep you safe on your journey.”
“They'll make this entire adventure into an episode of cooking mama combined with bob the builder is what they'll do. Fuck sake, why are all my items so weird?”
A high luck modifier changes your item drops to better suit your personality.
“Oh sure, blame it on me again. Very original. And fine, let's continue this blasted quest. Where did that twirling so-not-the-main-enemy-of-the-story go to?”
The dragon pulled out a torch and guided the hero forward as if he were guiding live traffic.
“Just keep going to the tower and try and avoid touching any of the exhibits. Feel free to pick up a complementary great big evil hand-sown puppet when you reach the gift store. They're rather rare.”
“How rare?”
“Less than fifty million were made this year.”
“Ah... right... that type of rare...”
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The Ten Realms
People Started falling down in pain at first. Then they saw screens and could sense an energy within them called mana by the screens. These people could gain skills, cast magic and do the impossible. Two weeks after, without fail, they disappear, never to be seen again. It was called the two week curse. Erik West was a combat medic, he was trying to save his friends lives, then he was blown up, leaving him with just one arm. At first he thought he had an infection, but then comes the news. He has the two week curse. Let's just see if there is such a thing as healing magic. Current release schedule: 3 chapters per week, coming out on Monday, Wednesday and Friday Patreon supporters can read ahead as well get access to other benefits! https://www.patreon.com/michaelchatfieldwrites
8 167Point Cultivation
My thoughts become reality when I think them and when I un-think them they un-become reality! I have become so powerful that not even alternate reality can stop me! My name is Joe Mo and I become the best!
8 75Dishonor
In the center of a nuclear wasteland lay the last vestiges of humanity, the City, as its numerous inhabitants called it. To leave its protective wall was certain death. Humanity was not meant to fit within the confines of a walled city. But, with a strict caste system and the threat of being sent to the lowest level of the caste system for even the smallest crime, the City has survived. Liv was born to the highest caste, Most Honored. After her father's treason and subsequent execution, her family was cast into the prison that the lowest caste, the Dishonored, lived in. Tortured and forced to work as a slave for every bite to eat, Liv desired revenge against the King that made her life a living hell and the City that held her captive. With a forced smile and a polite bow, Liv would destroy the overpopulated last bastion of humanity. Releases weekly on Tuesdays at 12:45 Eastern US Time. This story is posted on Wattpad, Inkitt, Moonquill, and Royal Road. There is an original old version (never been updated and does not have any chapters that have been published since 2016) available on Fiction Press and there is an old version of Dishonor (the first volume only) for sale on Amazon. If you are not reading on one of these location, you are reading a pirated version and you can read it for free on Royal Road.
8 443Tesla Stone and the World of Smoke and Mirrors
R0Q-T357-Alpha (callsign: Rock) is a "Core Child," an irredeemably-crippled test tube baby modified and repurposed by an advanced U.S. military project to serve as the CPU for two-thirds of America's orbital defense systems. Though no one outside of the Pentagon has ever heard of him, he protected his homeland from three ICBMs, a Pacific theatre invasion fleet, and one rogue asteroid. Now, after twenty-seven years of distinguished service from "birth," he is being honorably discharged into civilian life. The only problem is that "civilian life" isn't exactly livable for a glorified brain in a jar. How does a couple pounds of grey matter surrounded by five tons of life support systems and enough co-processing enhancements to take over the planet enjoy an early retirement when he's surrounded by overzealous politicians, corporate spies, and foreign agents after military secrets? The real world isn't that forgiving.
8 254Star Wars: Lost Hope
Failure. The REBEL ALLIANCE is on the verge of defeat. Following a daring mission to the Imperial research facility on Scarif, ROGUE ONE managed to capture the plans to the EMPIRE's new and powerful superweapon: the DEATH STAR. Putting the lives of the entire galaxy on the line, BAIL ORGANA entrusted the delivery of those plans to his daughter, Princess LEIA ORGANA. However, the EMPEROR's apprentice, DARTH VADER, tracked the Princess and her ship, apprehending the rebels and confiscating the stolen plans aboard the TANTIVE IV. With the plans and the Princess in his possession, Darth Vader returned to the Death Star to destroy the Alliance's HOPE once and for all. The fate of the galaxy and the balance of the FORCE are irrevocably changed as the Princess of Alderaan learns the true nature of the DARK SIDE.... (This story is a complete reworking of the entire Original Trilogy. I'm going to be borrowing material from both canon and legends because of it, but everything prior to A New Hope, including Rogue One and the Clone Wars, is all taken as true. This will be the first book in a trilogy I'm hoping to make, so stay tuned or leave some comments if you have any ideas on how I can improve!)
8 90MindFulMess
Forget MindfulnessMy mind Is A Mess-this cover art is not mine- all credit goes to artist-Book. 6
8 123