《Devour The Sun》Chapter 8: Facing the Endless Void
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Later that evening Erica found herself sitting alone by a campfire. Every inch of her body ached from her encounter with the giants just a few hours ago, each breath sending a surge of pain throughout her chest. She couldn’t help but feel battered, like a piece of dough in the hands of an unskilled baker. Though her injuries weren't much of a concern to her, as her own health had stopped being a priority many years ago. The pain was bearable thanks to the dragon, but everything else felt beyond overwhelming.
Death was never something she had thought much about in the past. It was sad and inevitable, yet it had always felt so distant. Up until her encounter with the giants, she always thought that she would fear the deaths of those she cared for more than her own eventually inescapable end, but oh how wrong she was. The paralysing fear which overcame her while trapped in the giant's firm grip was like nothing she had ever felt before. She could effortlessly describe the anger, grief and guilt she had felt when Molly or her mother had passed, but when faced with the terror of what appeared to be certain death she was left speechless.
That same tongue-tied sensation is what had caused the dragon to leave her alone for a while, to give her a chance to think things through. However, processing the events and emotions which had bubbled up in the last few days quickly proved to be no easy task.
Every time she closed her eyes she couldn’t help but see the eyes of someone else looking back at her. Molly’s dull, lifeless gaze, the giant's torn and despaired expression, Doctor Witherbarks fearful stare after she had attacked him. Each set of eyes associated with a different set of emotions, which mixed together into some twisted form of bitterness, confusion and exhaustion.
What made everything seem so complicated was the opportunity which had shown itself within the pain and chaos. The grief and guilt surrounding the death of her daughter crashing into the eagerness and hope she’d been given in the promise of a better future. The resentment and rage hailing from the doctor's betrayal violently colliding with the bubbling excitement deriving from someone believing in her, which was then shadowed by the doubt her lacking self-esteem created within her. The fear of death and the remorse over the fate of the giants facing off against the incredible rush of successfully doing what should be impossible.
A small part of her wanted to celebrate, she had cleared the first of many hurdles on her journey to get her daughter back. She had successfully pulled off the unimaginable, thanks to Dror’Khanik, the dragon who for some unfathomable reason believed in her. Though another part of her wanted to cry, as she had never before been this terrified. She had looked death in the eyes and been narrowly saved by a being capable of cheating death. She had panicked, cried, screamed and ran for her life. If she really was a hero like Dror’Khanik said, then she was probably the most pathetic hero she had ever seen or heard of… If this was the first of many challenges she would have to face to see her daughter again, then what would the next challenge look like? And what would the last challenge look like?
While the tragic death of her daughter was the heaviest of the burdens on her mind, she also couldn’t shake the thought that she had taken the life of another. The look of despair that had been plastered on the face of one of the giants filled her with guilt, as it meant they had been sentient enough to mourn the deaths of one another. It didn’t help that she couldn’t tell them apart all that easily now that they were all clad in heavy, full body armour. Their massive silhouettes now stood unnervingly still at one end of the glade each, like guardian statues which Erica wasn’t sure if they were alive or dead. She had not expected their expressions to be so… human, and Erica couldn’t help but feel like a monster for being the cause of their demise.
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“Dror’Khanik… are you there?” She asked the depths of her mind, still unsure of how her means of communication with the dragon worked.
“Yes, have you managed to put your thoughts in order?” The dragon’s deep and resonating voice echoed throughout her head.
“Not exactly, but I was hoping you could help me put the remaining pieces in place…”
“I see… and how can I be of assistance?” The dragon curiously asked as the soothing heat once again surrounded her.
“Why do you believe in me so much? I genuinely don’t get it. I am not a fighter, nor a hero for that matter. I am just a waitress, I don’t know how to fight. I thought I was going to die more times than I can count to when I was face to face with the giants, and you want to pull me into this entire mess… why?” Erica questioned the voice in her head, hoping to get some concrete answers as to what purpose she could possibly serve in this mess.
“Your idea of what makes a fighter is flawed. A fighter is not simply someone who knows how to throw a punch or wield a sword, it is someone who keeps going even when the odds of success are not in their favour. For years you were told that your daughter was destined to die, yet every single day you kept fighting. You got up in the morning to return to a job where you were disrespected by those around you, you skipped lunch to head home to feed your daughter, you stayed up late treating her despite the risk of getting sick yourself. You fought through your exhaustion despite everything around you telling you to give up… That is what makes you a fighter. The strengths you keep convincing yourself that you do not possess are called resilience and determination, and it is but the foundation of the potential you possess.” The dragon argued in a stern tone which sent chills down Erica’s spine. Even though she struggled to imagine herself in the ways he described, there was something within his reasoning which made sense.
“You put too much faith in me…” She responded with a forced chuckle as the pit of her stomach ached from the overwhelming mixture of emotions which constantly jumbled her thoughts. All of the pain and all her worries seemed so heavy, yet the feeling of finally being seen and understood made her feel so light. As if someone had finally seen and acknowledged all of her efforts and struggles, even if she herself failed to admit to it.
“Not at all, while you may not have any experience which will save you in a fight, your ability to stand back up when you are beaten down sets you apart from countless others. Everyone starts at the bottom of the mountain, but only those who possess the strength to stand back up when they fall will reach the top. You can study and train to get strong or smart, but determination and resilience… those are the qualities which will separate the great and the mediocre.”
“And you are trying to tell me that I am great…?” Erica asked in a doubtful tone.
“No, but you have the potential to be, and I can help you reach that potential.” The dragon said in a tone so confident it left Erica speechless. It felt strange to be believed in and encouraged. Almost as strange as the fact that she, a peasant hailing from nowhere special, was speaking to a dragon.
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“I-I am not sure what to say…” Erica mumbled, astonished at the fact that someone would speak about her in this way.
“You don’t have to say anything, you simply have to make a choice. To do what is needed and reclaim your daughter's soul, to accept my aid and be the warrior I know you can be. Or; to give up before you even tried, and return to a mediocre life where you will never be able to look upon your daughter's face again… The choice is yours, and neither path will be an easy one… I will not force you to stand up for yourself and fight for what is rightfully yours, but if you choose to fight then I do not want to see doubt in your eyes; I want to see confidence and hope… I will only ask you this once… are you willing to fight?” Dror’Khanik asked her, every word of his confident and inspiring. His very presence radiated power and demanded respect, yet he spoke so highly of a simple waitress. Even though she felt helpless, inadequate and worthless, his words made her want to fight. Like a ray of light guiding her way towards the exit of the seemingly endless system of caves she had been trapped in.
She closed her eyes for a moment and saw the face of her daughter, yet for the first time since her death, her expression was not cold or fearful. On her face a bright smile was plastered, with tears of happiness running down her face. Her eyes were closed, yet she still radiated hope and joy. With the weight of the dragon’s words on her shoulders, she asked herself if she was capable of facing what was to come, and to her own surprise she found only one answer. Yes, or at the very least she knew that she would never forgive herself if she did not try. The pit in her stomach could grow to the size of an endless void, and she’d still do whatever was necessary to make her daughter happy.
“I want to fight…” Her voice trembled as she spoke, yet simply saying those words brought her a smidgen of confidence.
“Then I shall give you the tools you need to succeed.” The dragon responded in a hopeful manner. “Once you feel ready, I have more instructions for you.”
“I think I am ready now.” She stated as a faint smile fell upon her lips. At the bottom of the pits of her fear and insecurities, she had found a glimmer of hope… something her life had been lacking for many years.
“How delightful, little one… then you must begin your journey eastward. Twelve days from here, you may find an old hideaway once used by ancient wizards who declared war on this world. It has stood empty and undiscovered for over 800 years, and now it will serve as your temporary home. With the aid of the giants you should be able to reach these caverns within just a few days, and from there we will begin properly preparing for everything that is to come.”
“800 years? Don’t tell me…” Erica voiced her trail of thoughts. Could it be a coincidence? Or was she truly about to wander towards a remnant of the tragic war whose outcome still defined her kingdom to this very day?
“Your intuition is correct.” The dragon interrupted her. “The caverns once served as a base of operations for the five necromancers that almost conquered this continent.”
“The Undying…” Erica whispered over her breath.
“Correct. A rather ironic name now, considering almost half of them have met their demise.”
“Half of them? What do you mean half of them? Every year the entirety of Strathos celebrates their death!” Erica argued anxiously.
“Little one, one does not become ancient by mere chance. Those who are ancient have mastered the art of cheating death. Though there is no need to worry, the remnants of The Undying are fighting amongst themselves, with time they will bring about each other's demise until none of them remain.” Dror’Khanik stated, as if the known world’s most terrifying necromancers were insects in comparison to himself. Necromancers who brought so much terror and death to the kingdoms of Strathos, that international holidays were elected to celebrate their demise. Countless memorials existed in the kingdom of Elladonia alone, and the deadlands to the north stood as a testament to the Undying’s terrifying power. Their destructive magic had destroyed a third of the kingdom, rendering the very soil infertile and the waters polluted. If the monstrous strength of the undying failed to even faze the dragon, then what sort of powers did he possess?
“And you are sure they won’t return to this hideout of yours?” Erica asked anxiously, fearing even the thought of stepping on the same floors as the five legendary wizards who had ended countless lives in mere months.
“The remnants of the Undying fear one another, they will not go where the others may find them. You have no reason to worry.” The dragon reassured her.
“You say that but I can think of countless reasons to worry… So I’m just going to have to trust you on this…” A heavy sigh leaving her lips.
“These worries will be the greatest obstacle in your journey to reclaim the life of your daughter. Abolishing those will be your most important task, and as time passes that will only get easier.” He sternly told her, and Erica couldn’t help but feel as though he was lecturing her.
“I’ll take your word for it…” She said with a gentle sigh and stumbled to her feet as her chest still ached from her encounter with the giants.
“Then I shall leave you to your journey. The giants are at your disposal, be sure to make use of them...”
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