I've been driving around for at least a half hour trying to find the perfect lunch for Phoenix and I.

Now that I was back in school, Phoenix surprised me with lunch twice, once a grilled chicken salad with my favorite dressing and the second time a bacon cheese burger and the best fries that were foodgasm worthy.

Today I decided to return the favor and surprise him at his work while he was at lunch. It took me forever to think of a perfect lunch idea.

I decided on one of the best taco trucks that I've ever had in Seattle. The line of course was as long as usual and it was absolutely freezing but I braved through it, getting myself a chicken quesadilla and him a super burrito.

Once I had our food neatly tucked in bags, I made my way to small outdoor market that looked really cute and friendly. I looked around and found someone selling fresh roses that were too cute to deny. I payed for a dozen roses in an assortment of colors before heading back to my car. Girls aren't the only ones who love flowers I think.

As I drove I couldn't help but feel giddy with excitement. I couldn't wait to see his face when I for once surprised him.

I then pulled up to the police station and had to look around to make sure Phoenixes squad car was there , meaning he was there.

I made sure to check my hair and outfit multiple times in the small mirrors of my car. I left the gym earlier so my hair was natural and in a ponytail, and I had on my workout outfit still, yoga pants that hit just above my ankles and a black sports bra, along with a windbreaker I left open.

I walked into the station where a middle age women sat at the front desk.

It wasn't all stainless steal and creepy looking, it was actually pretty warm and had a very inviting atmosphere.

"How can I help you?" She asked sweetly making me smile.

"Um yeah, I'm here for Phoenix Adams, I think he's on lunch I brought him some." I said gesturing to the bag of food in my hands.

"He's a lucky fellow!" He gushed. "I'll buzz you in, go straight through the doors and turn left, you'll probably hear them getting all rowdy in there." She told me rolling her eyes and flicking her hand.

"Thank so much! Have a really good day." I replied following her instructions.

My stomach turned in knots a little, it was making me a little nervous that Phoenix was with all his guys, meaning I would have the extra attention on me. I felt automatically self conscious at my no makeup and exposing top.

I gave myself a little pep talk, and slightly melted my fear away.

I followed the lady's instructions and easily heard the laughter of multiple guys.

I turned left and followed the loud talking until I came up to a room with the door closed. I knocked twice to let them know I was coming in before I actually walked in.

I spotted Phoenix right away and he spotted me too and smiled widely at him and held up the food.

He was leaving against a counter on the opposite side of the door , while a few other guys were standing too and a few were sitting at round small tables.

"Surprise!" I said happily holding up the bag.

All of the guys turned to look at me and I recognized a few like the hot guy Roger I had met at the holiday party and few others I seen at that holiday party. They all stopped their conversation to stare at me, making me a queasy.

"Hey guys." I said smiling at each of them before setting the food down on a nearby table, trying to make the atmosphere a bit more relaxing.

"That for me?" Roger asked , smirking at me while his eyes traveled up and down.

"Phoenix has been surprising me with lunch and I decided to return the favor." I explained , ignoring his stares.

"Has he know?" Roger asked me questioningly.

"Yeah , totally. It's been really sweet , because he's a sweet guy." I babbled a little nervously while making my way over to Phoenix finally.

All of the guys bursted into laughter making me confused.

"Phoenix is a sweet guy now. Phoenix how about you buy me lunch and surprise me." one of the guys mocked him in an over exaggerated high pitch voice that may have been meant to be mine.

"Bring me flowers too!" Another guy joined and soon they were all back to laughing at Phoenix's expense.

Roger just smirked and I rolled my eyes at all of them , turning back to Nix who was bright red and clenching his jaw at their boyish taunting.

"So do you want to eat here? Or I seen a bench at the little park about a block from her-" I began but was cut off.

"Maybe you should go, and I'll meet you later." Phoenix said handing me my purse that I set down on the table.

"Why are you busy? Did I come at a wrong time?" I asked him seriously wondering if I did something wrong.

"Aw what's wrong Nix doesn't want to go on his little lunch date anymore?" Joined in another officer in the background.

I took the food out of the bag anyways and handed Phoenix his burrito that was encased in a styrofoam box.

"We can eat here?" I offered quietly, not liking the look he was giving me. Maybe he would rather stay close to base?

His poster changed and his arms were crossed across his chest, just like all of his co workers when they were making fun of him.

I handed him the box but he pushed it away from me and began to feel my own face begin to get a little warmer that he was treating me like I was some sleazy girl who wouldn't stop following him around.

"Take it." I said through gritted teeth.

"No Amelia." He said back but lower, saying my real name instead of my usual 'Mia'

I pushed it on him to take it one more time and he gently pushed it away, except I didn't have a firm hold on it and the smothered burrito that was in the container flipped out and onto a new Nike windbreaker I recently bought.

My mouth was open wide and the room was quite for the first time since I got here.

"Mia, I'm sorry I didn't mean t-" Phoenix reached for my arm but I jerked it away.

"Never talk to me again." I told him turning around quickly and storming out to hide myself from the horrible embarrassing incident that just happened.

The guys all burst into "ooooooooooos" behind me as I hastily grabbed my items.

I shoved open the doors forcefully and I was thankful the receptionist lady wasn't there to witness the hot tears of embarrassment running down my face.

I got in my car and turned the heat up before taking my soiled jacket off and throwing it into the backseat.

My tears clouded my vision so I swiped at them hastily before I drove so I wouldn't wreck. The last thing I needed was another cast on my arm.

As I was pulling out I seen all of the boys emerge out of the station and get into their cars, including Phoenix who I seen give my car a glance before getting into his car with his partner.

I laughed but the laugh was dry with no emotion.

I made my way back to my apartment where I had to brave the cold because my sweater was soiled.

I got in and the first thing I did was check my phone to see if their was an apology text. There wasn't one, making my eyes spring another set of tears.

I started running a hot shower to relax me , but the tears kept rolling down my face. I felt a little pathetic but mostly confused. I felt like we were really close and it would be ok for me to bring him lunch infront of his friends but I was obviously wrong. For Christ sake I asked the guy to move in with me, we were going to discuss that tonight but that wasn't going to happen.

To him I was probably just a pointless fling. I mean I'm not even twenty yet, only 19 and still a teenager and I'm still in college . He's 22, really hot, and already has his career going for him. What more could I of offered.

I took a long deep shower and eventually made myself get out before I turned into a prune.

I wanted to feel better, but being humiliated by some one you really care about has an affect.

I dressed in a long sleep tee and turned my Tv on that was in my room while I laid in my bed and put on a Disney movie ,then picked up my phone and was surprised that it had many texts from Phoenix.

"

" "

I sat in pondering for a while on what to reply before angrily typing "

I set my phone on the side table by my bed and wiped my eyes, deciding I wouldn't shed any more tears on the subject. I am Mia Hale not Mia Fail.