《The Arrangement》18
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"What are you doing here?" Taehyung asked in a dangerously low voice. He had heard a laugh come from behind the couch, and when he turned to investigate, he was shocked to find Jungkook.
"I . . . I - " Jungkook stuttered before getting cut off.
"Get up," Taehyung said, eyes watching as the younger straightened. "Come with me."
Taehyung stalked into a hallway, away from the din and observation of other people. He tried taking deep, calming breaths as to not lose his shit on Jungkook. His control was barely hanging on by a thread.
When he put enough distance between them and the crowd, he spun to face Jungkook. "Why did you follow me here?"
Jungkook audibly swallowed. "I was curious."
"You were curious?" Taehyung repeated. "Don't you consider following me to be an invasion of my privacy?"
"Yes," Jungkook breathed. "I knew it was wrong. But I wanted to know where you were going and who you were meeting."
Taehyung strode forward. "You are not my parent, Jungkook, nor are you my lover or friend. You don't have the privilege of knowing those things about me."
"Then just tell me why, V. Tell me why you do this." He waved his arms in the direction of the photoshoot. "Why supply them with fake pictures so they can write false stories about you?"
"It doesn't matter!" He yelled, that tiny thread starting to unravel. No one had ever pushed him on this before.
Jungkook stepped closer. "I'm telling you it does! It matters to me, V. I'm trying to get to know you and I want to understand why you do this."
"Jungkook - "
The younger cut him off before Taehyung could scold him further. "What good does this do? Who are you trying to protect?"
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"Myself!" Taehyung exploded, losing all control. "Doing all this protects me."
Jungkook waited for him to go on.
"Fuck, do you think I enjoy this? Do you think I like living with all this fame? Everywhere I turn there are people trying to take what they can from me. People who will gladly misuse my name for their own benefit. I'm so tired of it," Taehyung said, staring into Jungkook's eyes.
Jungkook took another step forward and asked in a soft voice, "So why do you give them the power to write whatever the hell they want about you?"
Taehyung knew he shouldn't answer. The younger couldn't possibly understand. But yet . . .
He wanted to be able to tell someone.
And Jungkook was the first person ever to ask why he did the stupid, reckless things he did.
"When I first became V, the whole world was trying to learn my story. They tried so hard to dig into my past, to find something they could write about. Anywhere I went, I was chased and hounded by the paparazzi. I tried for so long to keep hidden, but I learned they'd never give up until they uncovered the truth about me. Or what they perceived to be the truth."
Jungkook listened quietly, remaining silent as Taehyung continued.
"I didn't want them to find that piece of me, Jungkook. If they did . . . it'd be over. So I learned to give them what they wanted to see. To control what information they get. If I keep them focused on this, then they won't dig deeper. They won't ask questions I don't want to answer. So they write things that are fake. But that's better than them writing the truth about me."
"That sounds very lonely and isolating," Jungkook said at last.
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"It is," Taehyung let out, his voice shaking.
He watched with stunned eyes as Jungkook closed the space between them, wrapping his arms around him in a protective hug. Jungkook pulled Taehyung's head into his chest, where the elder could hear his heart hammering away.
Jungkook ran his hand through Taehyung's hair in a soothing manner. "I won't press you for information, V. I won't ask what got you to this point. But . . . "
He pulled back so he could look Taehyung in the eyes.
"I'm not going to let you suffer alone. Whenever you need someone to talk to, or not talk to even, you can come to me."
Taehyung's heart lurched. "How can you say that? How can you be okay with that?"
"Because I've been there before," Jungkook said. "I've hid a part of myself from my family and friends, too. And even though I couldn't talk about what was going on, they were there for me anyway. So I will be that person for you."
The younger's hand, which had been carding through Taehyung's hair, shifted to cup the elder's cheek. Taehyung shivered at the light touch.
"I'm afraid," Taehyung admitted, knowing desperation was visible in his eyes. "I am shattered and I am so afraid. What if I let you in and you leave me again in the end?"
Taehyung flinched as he realized what he said - again - but Jungkook thankfully didn't catch that.
"You can trust me, V. I won't walk away from you," Jungkook murmured, his thumb rubbing soft circles on the elder's cheek.
Little did he know, he already had. But Taehyung pushed that fact aside for the time being. He let his mind tuck away the past so he could only focus on the present.
It was difficult, but Taehyung really did want to move forward. He wanted to believe people could change for the better. This person in front of him - this version of Jungkook - proved that it was possible to learn and grow, right?
If Jungkook could do it, maybe Taehyung could too.
"I don't want to push you away anymore," Taehyung said to Jungkook, placing his own hand on top of the boy's. But he also said it to himself. He didn't want to keep hiding who he was in the darkness and shadows.
Jungkook smiled at him, understanding and acceptance in his eyes. "Then don't."
The younger started to lean closer, his eyes flitting down to Taehyung's mouth.
"I'm still your mentor," he remarked, hating that boundary more than ever right now. "It would be wrong."
A chuckle escaped from Jungkook's throat. "I'm pretty much your mentor in life right now. So I say the two cancel each other out."
Taehyung felt a smile pull at his lips and he gave into it. He smiled big. "Well, with logic like that . . . "
He kissed Jungkook softly and tentatively, the way he wished their first kiss could have been. Not hot and heavy but full of hope and promise, of better days to come. It was that first step towards building a brighter future.
Jungkook pulled back first, an astonished look lighting up his face.
"What?" The elder questioned.
"You smiled," Jungkook explained. "I made you smile."
Jungkook was so happy that Taehyung couldn't refrain from smiling again.
And again.
And again.
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》 V A L E N W R I T I N G 《
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"love me and me only"|started: june 9, 2022 at 12:32 am|ended: n/a|finished editing: n/a
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