A word which is defined as a longing for a home you can't return to, or one that was never yours. not necessarily a house, but a homely feeling such as love.

That's what I've felt for the past 21 years. Yes, 21 years of living in the same house, and I've never seen it as a home. It was more of a building that I slept and grew up in but not a home. A home is supposed to be a place where you feel warmth, safety, comfort, and above all..love. I've never felt any of those things from any member of my family, with the exception of my older sister of course. But sometimes, I can't help but be jealous of her because, in the eyes of my parents, she is the "perfect child" who can do no wrong while I'm just their second daughter who can never live up to their expectations or surpass whatever my sister has achieved.

My name is Shuijing.

.