《The Bloody Adventures of Vini and Enzo》The Egg
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Barra da Tijuca, Rio de Janeiro
Wednesday, 9:00 PM, Barra da Tijuca. Another day in the lives of Enzo Carvalho and Vinicius Valverde. After a long day at school, Vini invited Belgium to his apartment. Mr. Banks dropped her off punctually at the appointed time in front of the gate at Lake Buena Vista. He kissed her on the cheek and waited for her father's Volvo to speed up and disappear into the Avenue Prefeito Dulcídio Cardoso.
- So, what do we have for today? - Belgium asked.
- Nothing, just lots of food and drinks at Vini's. - Enzo simply replied.
- Hey, Enzo, aren't you bringing anyone?
- Not today, no.
- Actually, Enzo, you've been going to the singles club alone for a while now. - Vini clarified, which frustrated his friend.
- Ha, ha. You are funny as all get-out.
But Vini had a point. As it turned out, Enzo hadn't seriously been with anyone since... Well, Italy. Still, it could be worse.
- Hey, Enzo, if you want, I can give you the phone number of a friend of mine. - Belgium proposed.
- Oh, no, no, no. - Enzo shook his head. - I don't play that kind of game.
- What game? - Vini was stumped.
- You know, Vini. "Oh, I have a friend who is single, I think you guys would get along well". A short while later, bang! She keeps calling and texting away.
- Nobody calls people anymore, Enzo. - Belgium pointed out. - Besides, this friend of mine is not at all... Needy.
- Oh, sure. First, she comes with the "oh, I'm not needy" stuff. It's always like that, Belgium.
- Look, I wasn't going to say anything, but my sisters used to say that about you.
Well, that changes everything.
- How is that?
- Italy used to say that about you. "Look how he tries to impress me. "Look, my boyfriend is so silly". Russia also said the same thing: "Belgium, Enzo stays too long on my breasts, he looks like a baby wanting milk". "Next time I'll bring a bottle.
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- Okay, okay, I dig! - Enzo got tired of the references and flashbacks.
Vini could not feel more ashamed.
After Enzo's moments of embarrassment, he was quiet for a while, while Belgium and Vini arranged the couch to watch a movie on Telecine. That's when Vini's girlfriend stood up to get a drink. Enzo didn't immediately notice, but what was on the couch caught his attention.
- What the fuck?
A few hours later, Belgium was waiting at the gate of Lake, meanwhile Enzo remained with that disturbing image in his head. Vini approached him and said:
- Buddy, you've been quiet all night.
- It's just that...
- Not that it's exactly a problem, I'm not complaining, it's just that it was unusual.
- Vini, I think...
- What do you want to tell me?
- If you shut your trap, I might tell you!
Vini understood Enzo's frustration.
- All right, sorry.
- I think Belgium laid an egg.
Oh, no. That was too much. Vini simply shook his head and left Enzo behind at the gate of Lake. As the white Volvo pulled up, Vini said goodbye to Belgium with a kiss on the cheek.
- How are you, Mr. Banks? - Vini nodded.
- All great, Vini! - his father-in-law replied.
The next day Enzo was still wondering about it. Or more accurately, about this egg. Since Vini didn't make a fuss, he brought the egg supposedly from Belgium in his refrigerator. Who knows what would happen, but Enzo appeared to firmly believe in the possibility that all we know about biology and anatomy was wrong.
- Vini, I'm serious. I saw it! - Enzo told.
- You saw nothing, you idiot. - Vini remained skeptical. - You're trying to make me lose my mind.
- Vini, she got up and the egg was there!
- Enzo, buddy, you've said a lot of nonsense throughout our friendship, but it will take some time to get over this one.
- Great. If you don't want to believe me, that's fine. But I'll prove it to you!
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- Look, Enzo, if you do anything stupid, Belgium will get pissed off. And, obviously, it will be your fault!
- All right, all right, all right. But you will see, Vinicius Valverde.
Still, it could be worse.
The next day, Enzo stopped by the house of the Europe Sisters, with a single purpose. To prove that what he had seen was not a mirage or something in his mind. But logically he couldn't tell Belgium, so creativity must count for his plan to succeed.
- Enzo? - Italy greeted him, a little confused.
- Hi, Italy. - Enzo hugged her. - How are you?
- Fine, I guess.
- Is your sister here?
- Which one? I' ve got six, Enzo.
- I know, but the fun never goes away. Anyway, I wanted to talk to Belgium.
- Belgium? Belgium? Why?
- Actually, it's kind of a particular topic.
- Oh. It's okay. She's in her room. She's in her room. You know where it is.
Enzo took off his shoes and left them under the low-hanging fruit. The door to her room was closed. A potential problem. Any wrong move could bring irreparable consequences. Nevertheless... He knocked twice on the door.
- Enzo? - Belgium asked. - What are you doing here?
- Actually, I would like to talk to you.
- Is anything wrong?
- No, no.
Well, not yet. Because Enzo would need a lot of imagination to explain what he meant. But as it turned out, he wouldn't have a very clever way of explaining it. He sat down on the end of the bed and started to come up with a clever strategy. As he couldn't think of anything, he ignored the whole picture, including his embarrassment. So, instead of using words, he went for actions. Enzo leaned his body forward, closed his eyes, intending to kiss her. Belgium immediately pulled away.
- Enzo? What the fuck?
- Wait a minute.
- Are you completely out of your mind?
- Hold on!
- Enzo? What the hell is wrong with you?
But after the wait, nothing came out. Or happened.
- What the fuck? - Enzo was more than puzzled.
- Enzo? What are you doing? - It turned out that Belgium was not exactly understanding of what was going on.
- The book was wrong, then.
- Book?
- No, nothing.
- Enzo Carvalho. You'd better explain calmly what you are trying to do.
- It's just that I...
- I mean, I have an inkling of what happened. Your neediness is so bad that you decided to shoot all over the place.
- How's that again?
- Yes. My sisters tell me. First Italy, then Russia, and don't assume that I don't know about your affair with Albania. Now me. You are completely out of control!
- Albania? Who told you this?
- Vini.
- Vini! - Enzo hummed. - But it wasn't my fault.
- Just a moment, dummy. I'm going to the kitchen.
Belgium got up and left the room. As she left, an egg appeared on the bed. Enzo was incredulous.
- Fuck me!
As soon as Belgium returned, Enzo was not going to let the occasion go by.
- Belgium, are you laying eggs?
- What? - She started to laugh. - Have you gone crazy for good?
- Belgium, the egg popped up... As soon as you left!
- Honey, you need some air. Go to Italy's room, maybe she'll give you some warmth.
- Yeah, you're right. I think I'm going nuts.
Enzo stood up and went to Italy's room. But the story doesn't finish here, since Belgium needed to return the egg to the fridge. After all, Enzo was not going to fall for that story more than once. Apparently.
- Ha. - She laughed. - Silly, silly boy.
Still, could be worse...
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