《By Myself》Chapter 1 – Those who live in fear [Epilogue]
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When morning shined through the canopy’s veil, it was basic instinct for Philad to wake up from her slumber. Her nest was built atop a large and sturdy oak, it wasn’t that high of an altitude to construct her hideout, but it was better than nothing.
The first thing she noticed was the stench her body emitted; the mixture of sweat, semen and blood permeated her cozy home with a smell her nose quickly abhorred, categorizing the scent as a nasty one she had to somehow get rid of. Maybe coating the entire nest with pollen would help mask the scent until she could clean it up.
Feeling tensed from the night she spent, she stretched her long limbs, opening her wings and extending her feathers as far as she could to alleviate her morning numbness. Fresh and ready, Philad jumped on top of the nest to retrieve her clothes, tainted in the dry blood she spilled last night. Removing it would prove to be a hassle, but she didn’t mind those things at all, as long as she could maintain the habit in decent shape it was worth it. The clothes had that much value in her eyes.
Folding it between her strong feathers, she went back inside to check on his guest and see if she could do anything more with him. However, the poor thing was now a bloody mess, only enough to sustain her for a day, or maybe two if the next hunt resulted in a fruitless effort to catch a prey. He was an interesting male to mate with, she never encountered a man who showed such feverish desire to claim her until now. Well, he was actually the first male she brought back home, nonetheless she didn’t expect him to embrace her so fiercely, he was so aggressive she felt a tinge of fear during the whole act, a cautious sentiment which whispered to her she shouldn’t let him continue that way. But it was so intense, so true… So oppressing, so terrifying.
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She was thankful it all ended well in the end, as inviting a member of the folk who extinguished her people was a risky gamble. What if he struggled to the end? What if he actually brought one of those short, sharp weapon with him and struck her during the act? What if it didn’t end well at all for her? The thoughts filled Philad’s head with dreadful pictures, seeing herself bathing in her own blood, drowning in agony while the human male would laugh at her, being glorified for striking down the last harpy. Appalled by the possibility, Philad found herself crooking in a corner, shaking in fear with the image of her own deceased body clear to her eyes. She shook her head to clear her mind of such negative thoughts, because she was still alive, because she was uninjured, because she could still live to see another day in this unequitable world. Her eyes met the man’s corpse, lying a short meter away from her.
She thanked him from the bottom of her heart for being such a compassionate mate, and also for being such a delicious midnight snack. She couldn’t tell if she was true to her origins, but the hunger she felt while he was on top of her grew stronger and stronger until she couldn’t resist anymore. A sad development, or a natural occurrence for her species? She didn’t knew. She wished she could have learnt about it, however, she never had the chance to be educated in those fields. That wasn’t so bad, she reassured herself, but probably an experience she wouldn’t relieve again for now.
Because it was time for breakfast, and also because her stomach growled with appetite, Philad took another bite in the man’s corpse. The tastiness of his flesh brought a faint joy to the harpy, a feeling she couldn’t exactly describe with her own words. Stains of blood coloured her jaw in a fluidic bright red, tickling her a bit as she wiped it with her wing’s feathers. She would wash them later in the morning, for now she had other things to think about.
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Hunting on the human’s town’s walls was the right choice, as they were leisurely strolling on top of them as if they asked to be picked by her talons and serve her as dinner. Boars, beers and hinds were quite nutritious, but because they were covered by the trees’ branches it didn’t help her at all in dropping on those kind of prey. Her eyes were sharp enough to scout through the canopy, however the simple thought of damaging her clothes prevented her from leaping too harshly on them, leaving her no choice but to sometimes feast on other delicacies. Herbs, flowers, roots, she even succeeded in gathering a few fruits to enjoy their sweetness, which was a rare memory she cherished from her childhood.
Her stomach half-filled with human’s meat, Philad once more jumped at the top of her nest to begin her short journey to the nearest river in order to properly clean herself and her garment. The habit was a refined robe her mother was dressed in for special ceremonies, a gown specifically made for those days when everyone gathered together in the same place to share their time in a joint gesture towards a greater being.
Before leaving, Philad repeated what her mother taught her to do every day whenever she saw the sun rising. Before the blazing light, the harpy kneeled, spreading her wings in a dignified manner which displayed all the respect and the love she felt for her goddess. There, a gentle hand caressed her cheek. She looked up to look at the person, but noticed she was alone since the beginning. Another illusion… No, another souvenir from her mother, an undying motherly love for her cherished daughter, or another sign she was loved back by the Day Goddess. A smile drew itself on her face: a joyful smile, but drawn on her sad expression for losing everything that day.
“The Day Goddess smile to every people who wake up on the morning, and who smile back at her.”
Philad remembered the words her mother taught her, a testimony from a past spent in the monastery as the priestess’s heir, still true and ingrained in her very soul to this day. It truly was a miracle she managed to survive for so long, but she only did because she was looked after by a greater being, someone who cared for her. After praying, Philad bowed one last time, then opened her wings to depart for the sky.
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