“Guild Leader,”

“Yeah?”

“I didn’t know that you already have kids.”

“Zip it. They are not mine.”

“Oh, from your ex then?”

“Do you have any death wish?”

“I do have one. I actually drool for that Flaming Warlord set of yours. Mind lending it to me?”

“Lend your sister. Lend your face.”

“I don’t have a sister but I do have a face. Are we on a deal?”

I heard loud laughter from my headpiece. This stupid Warrior, the Vice Guild Leader, was really happy today. I wonder if he found a girlfriend. Die, traitor!

“Jokes aside, are they really not yours?”

“Out. Let’s go to the arena.”

I heard him laughing again, “Okay, fine. Not yours.” But then some chuckles still escaped him.

“Too much happiness is unlucky. Go away. Don’t jinx this run.”

Currently, we are running an Instance Dungeon together with the other 28 guild members. This traitor is the tank, and I, as the Blademaster, am the main attacker.

I’m not gonna elaborate this game nor the name of that guy above since they are not the topic of this story. What’s really important is the event taking place in the background, I mean inside my house.

“Yummy! Hum~”

“This one is my favorite.”

“It’s a cat! Yey!”

“Are there no dogs? Uncle Ken?” Leon asked me.

What the heck? When you’re looking for dogs, do you really need to look at me instead? Whoa. I need to focus here. I almost died there.

“Find it yourself, brat.”

“Hmf.”

“I found a bunny! Cute!”

Stop imagining what they’re eating. Those are just cookies. Yes, animal shaped cookies.

The pretty Lady Chen from downstairs brought me some; sorry, actually it’s for the kids. Ever since she found out that I’m staying with a twin she can’t help asking about them, trying to play with them, and for many times now, she has brought sweets for these monkeys.

Honestly, I thought she has already fallen for me; but, no worries. I just know it’s only a matter of time. I wonder why I feel a bit itchy. I am not hallucinating.

I focused on my game once again and finished the dungeon quickly. Right after the run I thanked everyone and bade them goodbye. Some of them had the gall to even tease me. They said that I’m about to feed my kiddos. Heh. You’re all kiddos, you’re families are kiddos.

“Hey, where’s mine?” I asked the two.

“Sister Chen said that those are for the two of us.”

“Yeah, and so?” Why do I feel that this brat’s tongue has been changing scarily fast? He used to be a meek and cute monkey before.

“Gone.”

Dang, brat! He even flipped the bowl over to show that there’s really none left! Oh, there were bits of crumbs.

“Uncle Ken,” called little Lena.

“…what?” with bitter heart, I forced myself to ask back.

“Ah.” She pulled me down to her height level and said that.

“Ah?”

*Pwoosh* She agilely put a piece of cookies into my mouth. Oh my lovely angel Lena! Have I ever told you how wonderful you are? I feel sweetness overflowing from my mouth. I think maybe I’m really hallucinating. But I do feel sweet.

“Tsk.” I didn’t even bat an eye on Leon’s tut-tut.

***

I don’t really go out from my room that much. No, I’m not lazy; I just have many things to do inside. Whatever. I am proud of being an otaku, mind you. I earned it.

But, right now, I’m walking in this paved sidewalk with two kids pulling me from both sides. They seemed to be so eager to see the world. Ah, ignorance is bliss.

I heard that there would be an event today near the river banks and so there would also be many street vendors. That’s why I decided to bring these monkeys there. Wallet, check. My attire, double check. Handsomeness, infinity+1, perfect.

When we arrived in the venue, I learned that the so called event was some community contest. People were dancing, singing, doing tricks or trying to be some comedic idiot on the stage. Why are they killing their own grandfathers? That’s really not my problem so I just brought the kids along to find foods that will suit them.

“Wow!” exclaimed Lena.

I looked towards where she’s staring at and found the colorful and big cotton flowers. “Those are cotton candies. They come in varied designs like flowers and animals. But don’t be fooled they are mostly made of air, that’s all.”

I think someone murmured ‘stupid’ but I didn’t mind it. I know it’s not me it’s referring to

“She wants it.”

“Oh.” I stared at Leon who I really believed is currently looking at me contemptuously. This is another hallucination. Yeah.

I had no reason not to buy her one. I bought her the flower shape which was really huge for her size and a pig shape one for the cheeky Leon. I smugly looked at him who’s holding a pig cotton candy that’s half of his size.

By the way, I only bought ikayaki or the grilled squid for myself. No, I’m not being stingy.

We walked around the area and tried the other stalls since there were also shooting games, tossing games, guessing games and others games. I already miss my games.

We also saw some life size mannequins that were sporting fancy clothes by the center. When we neared them, they actually moved! That scared the soul out of me—I mean the kids. I noticed that Lena was really scared of those circus-looking guys, so I made sure not to walk near them again. Before the event finally ended, they lighted the fireworks.

It was wonderful. I hope the kids liked it. Right? I looked both my sides.

“Where is Lena?” I asked. Leon turned so quickly I was a bit worried with his neck. He had his eyes staring widely, almost popping at me.