“You said we’ll play the Prince saving the Princess today!”

“But we already played that yesterday, Lena.”

“Yesterday it was the dragon that kidnapped the princess but today the bad Black Magician will kidnap her.”

“Kidnapping again?”

“Come on, Leon. You said you’ll play with me!”

“How about we play other games? I got a new lego set here.”

“Wuu, wuu. Leon, you’re a liar! Wuuu!”

“But, but, I’ve been playing with dolls for days!”

“Wuu, wuu, wuu!”

“Quiet down, will you? What’s wrong? Are you guys hungry?”

“Wuu, wuu. Uncle Ken, Leon is a liar. Wuuu!”

“I am not.”

“Staph!” Crap, I burnt my tongue. And what’s with that plot? The Princess was kidnapped in consecutive occasions? Can’t a princess be dumber?

“Uncle, did you twist your tongue?”

“Lena! Getaway from Uncle, he’s a zombie now!”

Yes, currently, I am living with two highly imaginative kids. A girl and a boy; actually they’re twins. The girl’s name is Lena and the boy’s is Leon. No, they’re not my kids. They’re my brother’s. Though, we’re not blood related.

“I told you two monkeys to call me Big Brother. I’m only 23 years old. Where can you find a young and handsome uncle like me?” And what the hell, using me to get-away from playing dolls, Leon?

I can’t help retort that way since the kids won’t stop calling me uncle. The brat even said that I’m a zombie just because I burnt my tongue trying to cook lunch and curbing their fight at the same time. Where’s the justice in that?

“Okay. All done. Let’s eat.”

I called for the two of them to the dining table to eat lunch. I definitely couldn’t see Leon’s smug look towards me. No, I really don’t.

“Eat properly, brat. You’ll grow taller and faster at that.”

“I can eat ten plates of this.” Leon boasted.

I wanted to stretch those cheeks of this cheeky brat. But hey, that means my dish is really delicious, right?

“Alright, I forgive you.” I flashed him a dazzling smile.

“Huh? You’re a creepy uncle.”

“Hey, where did you learn such words?”

“From Gumball.” He answered.

“Who’s Gumball? Is it not Dragon Ball?”

“Gumball is Gumball, Uncle Ken.” He looked at me condescendingly.

I’m fed with this little brat. “Lena, who is Gumball?”

“Ghum-bawl? I’z Ghum-ball.”

She just talked with her mouth full! Argh! Twins! No, they’re not a bit MOE! Not a bit, I say!

I sighed and started eating, as well. I watched the kids as they finish their plates and it kind of gave me some sense of accomplishment.

Today is their third day with me. Although, Brother Benjie usually brings these kids here when his boss calls for him; this time is a bit special. Today is December 5 and these kids will stay with me until over Christmas. Scratch that, until over New Year.

Exactly, their father won’t be coming home before this year ends. Sad, indeed.

As for me, being left out, that’s quite normal. See here, I am just an orphan. I studied quite diligently, worked for years and was able to save a bit. I bought an old piece of land with a haunted bungalow house, tore it down and built a new and a three-story house. I had the first and second floors rented and the third floor solely for my lonesome vocation. A livelihood, living quarters and an otaku sanctuary in one. Perfect.

So basically, these two abandoned kids and an otaku-me will be celebrating—not, staying together and will give me a lot of headache until this stupid of a holiday comes to pass. Yes, exactly like that.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t hate Christmas. The latter hates me, instead. See those couples around? Yes, how come I don’t have one? I don’t have a family to celebrate this holiday with, okay fine. Then why is there no boobies, I mean girls, for me instead? Hey, Santa? Where are you? Com’ere. I promise I won’t hit you.

Okay, enough with my monologues. Where the heck are those kids??

“Uncle Ken, I want another.” Lena shouted from the kitchen.

What the—then little kiddo ask me, don’t just go running to the kitchen! That’s dangerous!

“It’s too high. I can’t reach.” Leon added.

“Alright. Calm down, little monkeys.” I followed them to the kitchen and poured them a second serving and brought their plates back to the dining table. “Are you usually like this at home?” I asked.

“Yes. Dad is always busy.” Leon answered proudly.

“Dad works everyday for Lena and Leon.” Lena sweetly added.

““Dad is the best.”” They both declared.

“Alright, alright. I’m not gonna take away your daddy.” These kids really love their dad, huh? Lucky you, Brother Benjie. But still we have the same luck towards girls. I’m feeling a bit proud.

I really wanted to keep on teasing these brats but I also have my work—cough, I mean my guild needed looking after. And there’s also my farm and city that needed attending. What? Did anyone have problems with me?

I cleaned up the table, washed the plates and led these little monkeys into their afternoon nap. Of course, they needed some pigging-up to be ready for slaughter. Oh, that’s a joke.