《Because of Karson》Chapter 24
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"You're so beautiful," Jason whispered as he grabbed my waist. I felt my body tense under his touch as I whimpered in pain.
"P-please, let me go," I trembled as I stared into his black eyes. He wore an evil smirk as he kissed down my neck. I struggled, trying to push him off, but he roughly punched me in my abdomen in return.
I heaved, coughing as I tried to catch my breath."S-stop."
"Don't tell me what to fucking do," he growled as he tightly gripped my hair. He pulled my hair as my head jerked up, looking directly into his eyes. I screamed in pain, my scalp burning as he continued to pull. "Take it off, now."
My body jerked up, breathing heavy as I looked around the room. I felt disoriented as I stared into the darkness. My hands began to shake as a bead of sweat ran along my forehead. I had tears streaming down my face as I remembered the nightmare I just had.
It was a recurring dream that only started after a few nights ago. When he touched me, it triggered memories from a few years ago. I vividly remembered the encounter that happened when I was only 15. I whimpered as I remembered every detail from that night.
I trembled, covering my mouth with my hand as I tried not to wake anyone else up. I shakily looked at the clock on the bedside table. 4:15am.
I rubbed a shaky hand over my face, wiping away the sweat that grazed the back of my neck. I moved my legs over as they dangled on the side of the bed before I slowly got up. Tears still streamed down my face as I let them fall freely.
My knees gave out as I got up, holding onto the nightstand to regain my balance. I took a shaky breath as I walked to the bedroom door. I reached my hand out, grabbing the doorknob and slowly turning it so it wouldn't creak open.
I looked down the hall to make sure no one was there. I released a huge breath, relief washing over me as I slowly made my way to the nearest bathroom to freshen up.
I dragged my hand along the wall to guide myself to the bathroom. There were no lights on, so I struggled as I squinted my eyes to try and see ahead of me.
I ran my hand along the wall and stopped when I felt something unusual. I gasped in surprise when someone caught my wrist.
"Princess?" I almost screamed in horror when I heard Karson whisper my name. My heart began to pound in my chest as more tears streamed down my cheeks. I stumbled back, I thought no one was awake.
I violently shook my head as I felt him grab wrist once more. I flinched as his skin made contact with mine, memories of Jason touching me clouding my thoughts. I whimpered as my body felt weak.
"I-I'm sorry for waking you up," my voice came out shaky as the hallway light turned on. I squinted my eyes as they tried to adjust to the bright light. At some point, Karson let go of my hand and turned on the light. I was too shaken up to realize it.
"You're crying," Karson pointed out as he narrowed his eyes at me. His eyes scanned every inch of my face before meeting my gaze. I looked at his beautiful green eyes, noticing that his under eye bags were darker than before. He's been awake this whole time.
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"Why are you awake?" I sniffled, quickly rubbing my eyes to eliminate any trace of me crying, even though he already saw my tear stained cheeks.
"Why are you crying?" He pushed, his arms crossing in defense. His eyes grew darker as he stared at my tear-brimmed eyes longer. I felt a lump grow in the back of my throat as I choked down the tears.
"I'm not crying," I lied.
"Cut the bullshit, Dakota," he growled as he took a step forward.
"So what if I'm crying?" I hissed, my emotions turning into rage as I pushed my sadness down further and further. I didn't know how much longer I was able to keep everything inside.
"Obviously something is wrong," he growled, his freckles on display as the dim lighting shined on them.
"So?" I scoffed, whispering because I didn't want to wake anyone up.
"So?" He echoed as his rose in anger. "There has been something that's been bugging you since you got here. Why the fuck are you crying?"
I felt tears of anger roll down my face as I stared at him. The tears made my vision blurry, but as they fell one by one, I could see him more clearly. "Why do you fucking care?"
"I don't fucking care!" He harshly whispered. I felt my breath get lodged in my throat as my gut twisted in agony when he admitted he truly didn't care. Why did it hurt so much? "I just want to know why the fuck you're up this early crying. What is wrong with you?"
"God, you're infuriating! You don't give a fuck about me, yet you get mad when I don't tell you why I'm crying? It doesn't make any fucking sense! Why should I even tell you to begin with!?" I pushed my finger into his chest as more tears fell down my face in frustration. "You get mad at me for absolutely no reason and then you ask me what's wrong? You! You're the only person who makes me fucking livid. You make me feel insane. I don't even know-"
"Dakota," his rough voice cut me off as he held both of my wrists.
"I don't understand why you treat me like shit. First with Brody, then Jason, and now you? And Jason, God I can't even put into words how much I hate him. H-he-" I trembled, a sob threatening to break through. I kept rambling, not realizing how much I was truly hurting until now. The thought of Jason's hands on my body made me nauseous as my stomach clenched in pain.
"Princess," Karson whispered, his voice softer as his eyes held a look of concern.
"J-Jason is such a dick, too. The way he t-touches-" I couldn't finish my sentence before I completely broke down, my exterior finally crumbling into pieces. I held my good hand over my mouth, trying to keep the sobs in as I shut my eyes.
My body felt weak as my knees hit the ground. Karson caught me in his muscular arms, hugging my body tight as he slid down the wall, cradling my shaking figure.
"Shh, I got you," Karson whispered as my head fell into the crook of his neck. I was practically sitting on his lap as he repositioned my body to sit on his legs. I wrapped my arms around his neck as I let every tear fall.
"I'm so sorry," I mumbled into his shirt, but he just shook his head.
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"Stop talking, princess," he whispered as he gently ran his fingers through my hair. I felt my body begin to shake as I grabbed a fist full of his shirt. Take it off.
I winced as those words replayed in my head. My mother was in the kitchen, downing another beer as her daughter was getting assaulted in the room next to her. She didn't care, she never did. I was only 15.
Karson had one hand wrapped around my waist as his other hand gently raked through my hair. He pulled my body against him, holding me tighter as my sobs grew louder. I cradled him, my legs on either side of his waist as our chests were pressed together.
His cologne filled my nostrils, the strong smell distracting me from my horrid thoughts. The way he smelled almost had me drooling, he smelled so fucking good.
He rubbed my back soothingly as I continued to cry. I felt so pathetic as he held me tightly. He has seen me in my most vulnerable state and I'm not sure how I feel about it. If I'm lucky, he won't make fun of me about it tomorrow. But as of right now, I didn't care. I just needed someone, anyone.
"I'm ruining your shirt," I mumbled into his shoulder. His body slightly shook under me from his small bubble of laughter that came out as he shook his head.
My body felt drained as I let the last tear fall. I sniffled as I just rested my head on his shoulder. My head was turned to where I just stared at the empty hall ahead of me. I inhaled a sharp breath, and shakily exhaled after a few moments.
"Don't worry about it," he responded as he continued to rub my back.
His voice sounded so gentle. I've never seen this side of him before and it made me feel weird. Who would've thought that there was a soft side under his tough exterior?
I sighed as I matched our breathing pattern. His chest rose as my chest rose along with him. I focused on my breathing so I could calm down. My face felt sticky and my throat was sore. I was so tired, but I didn't bother moving.
"I'm sorry you have to see me like this," I quietly apologized as I let my voice sound weak and vulnerable. I was tired of pretending.
"Don't be sorry, princess," he mumbled as he moved my hair to one side. "You've been acting like you're fine all day. I knew you were going to breakdown at some point." His voice held sincerity, not a single ounce of sarcasm hidden between his words.
His fingers grazed over my neck, sending chills down my spine as I held my breath. I shakily released my breath when he rested his head against the wall. I was still cradling him, our bodies tightly pressed up against each other. We fell into a comfortable silence as I finally decided to lift my head up from off his shoulder.
I slowly lifted my head as I stared into his emerald eyes. They were breathtaking. I sniffled once more as he wore an unreadable expression. He slowly raised his hand off my waist and gently wiped the remaining tears underneath my eyes. I gave him a sad smile as my cheeks grew red from embarrassment.
"God, I must look fucking insane," I groaned as I rubbed my hand over my face. I gently moved my legs to one side of his body as he helped me get up. My legs were shaky, but not as weak as before.
He quickly got up after me, standing directly in front of me as I crossed my arms to cover my body. "You look fine, princess."
I rolled my eyes, knowing damn well he was just saying that to make me feel better. "Why do you even call me that? It's stupid."
He looked at me with his eyebrows raised. "Stop pretending you hate it, princess."
I gaped at him, my mouth slightly ajar as I stared at him with wide eyes. He chuckled, showing off his dimples as he lightly shook his head. I mentally cursed myself, because deep down I knew that princess gave me a giddy feeling in my stomach every time he called me that.
"Whatever," I mumbled as I wiped my eyes once more.
Karson cleared his throat as every ounce of playfulness disappeared from his eyes. His face was hard as he looked at me with an intense gaze. "Do you want to talk about it?"
I lightly shook my head, too embarrassed to get any words out. This was a mistake. I knew tomorrow he would go back to being a dick, so why bother trying to have a conversation when he would use it against me the next day? It wasn't worth it.
"Just don't go too fucking hard on the jokes tomorrow," I sarcastically joked as a sad smile grazed my lips.
His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What are you talking about?"
"Oh come on," I rolled my eyes. "I wouldn't be surprised if you went around telling people how pathetic I looked just now."
His eyes grew a shade darker, pissed as those words fell from my mouth. "Why the fuck would I do that?"
"Have you met yourself, Karson? You've literally talked shit about my dead dad," I snorted as I blinked at him, my mouth dry.
"Fuck," he cursed under breath, not knowing what else to say.
"Thank you for helping me," I smiled, trying to redirect the conversation. "But just promise me to not go around telling anyone. I'm already embarrassed as it is."
"I won't fucking tell anyone," he growled, almost closing the distance between us. I smelled his minty breath fan across my face as I looked up to reach his gaze.
My eyes felt puffy and swollen, so I was internally cringing as I thought about him being able to see every imperfection. We were so close that I could see the golden specks swimming in his eyes, making them even more capturing. God, I could stare into his eyes all day.
"Thank you," I breathed as my heart beat loudly in my chest. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck raise as shivers ran down my spine. I was nervous.
"If you want to talk about what happened tonight," he started, never once breaking eye contact with me. "I promise I'll be there to listen, okay?"
My eyes widened in shock as I heard the promise fall from his mouth. Karson? As in, the Karson Ryder was being nice? "Okay."
He reached out to lightly trace his fingers along my jaw, tracing the bruise I forgot I had. I closed my eyes, breathing out as I let his hand travel up to cup my cheek. He ran his thumb along my lower lip like how he did in the dining room, causing me to freeze for a few seconds.
I opened my eyes to see him staring directly into mine. "No more crying, okay?"
I gave a breathless laugh because we both knew that I wasn't capable of doing that. He released his hand from my face and stuffed them in his pockets. "No guarantee, Ryder."
It was so odd to see him like this. He didn't wear his usual smirk and he wasn't being an ass. He didn't look like himself, with his under-eye bags and droopy eyes. In fact, he looked absolutely drained. Maybe he was so exhausted that he wasn't thinking straight and didn't know it was me he was talking to. I slightly laughed to myself as I thought of how ridiculous that sounded. Of course he knew it was me.
I randomly felt like crying again. What the fuck is wrong with me? Am I about to start my period?
"Dakota," his voice sounded rough as my name rolled off his tongue.
I cleared my throat. "I'm going back to bed."
I turned on my heel to walk back to the guest bedroom as a lump began to form in the back of my throat. The thought of sitting alone in the dark, surrounded by my thoughts made me nauseous. I knew I wasn't going to be able to go back to sleep because my thoughts wouldn't stop racing.
Karson grabbed my wrist and twisted me to face him once more. I breathed out in annoyance as he held me still. I could feel my eyes begin to water as I held back a whimper. Why am I so emotional?
He pulled me into his chest, the smell of his cologne engulfing me. My body stiffened as my head buried into his chest. He rested his head on top of my head as he wrapped his arms around my neck. I slowly relaxed my tense muscles and allowed myself to wrap my arms around around his waist.
We were hugging. What the fuck.
The warmth of his body encased my shaking figure. I clawed at his shirt, getting a handful as I squeezed my eyes shut. I let the tears fall again, huffing in defeat.
He pulled away, but still held onto my shoulders. He frowned when he saw the lonely tear that fell down my cheek. He shook his head. "What did I tell you, princess?"
"No crying, blah blah," I rolled my eyes. "But I did say no guarantee."
He lightly shook his head as his thumb wiped away the single tear. "Try and get some sleep, okay?"
I huffed. "I'll try."
I looked at him one last time before I was finally able to walk back into my room. When I looked back, he was already gone, disappearing down the stairs as he left me to turn off the hallway light. I flicked the switch and went back into the dark room.
I crawled back into bed, cradling my injured hand as I looked up at the ceiling. My pulse increased as I thought about Karson's arms wrapped around me. I wish he acted more like this. The way our skin touched each other, feeling cold after he pulled away. I wish I could relive that moment. I felt safe in his arms.
If he acted like this more often, maybe my feelings towards Karson would be completely different. Maybe I wouldn't hate him. Maybe I would've fallen for him. All of these 'maybes'.
Maybe there is more to Karson than I thought. His tough exterior could be an act, or maybe, deep down he is just as vulnerable as I was tonight. I closed my eyes as silent tears slowly fell down my cheeks. I knew he told me not to cry, but it was the only way I knew how to get rid of my cooped up emotions. I let the tears fall until the morning came. I was never able to fall asleep, so I just stared at the ceiling until the rest of the house woke up.
~•~•~
I never got out of bed until I heard Braxton's voice yelling at Colton from downstairs. I groaned, rubbing my puffy eyes as my sore body got out of bed. My muscles felt tense and my neck was sore from laying in one position the whole night.
I was exhausted. I could barely keep my eyes open, but being tired was better than having a nightmare about Jason. I glanced at myself in the nearest mirror and sucked in a sharp breath when I saw my appearance.
My hair was tangled, strands sticking out in many different directions. My blue eyes were dull and my face was pale.
I quickly raked through my locks, hissing in pain when I got caught in a tangle of hair. I patted down my hair until it looked somewhat decent. My eyes didn't look too puffy, but if you stared long enough, it's easy to tell that I've been crying.
I looked at my reflection one more time. "Good enough."
My tear stained face was better as I continued to wipe away the sticky residue. My hair wasn't as tangled, but my eyes still held that dull look. I don't fucking care anymore.
I huffed as I stepped out of the bedroom and headed downstairs. I took slow steps, yawning with every step I took. I eventually reached the bottom and noticed my siblings sitting at the dining table as they stuffed their faces with cereal.
I walked up to them and roughly sat down in a chair that was across the table from Jace. He looked up, raising his eyebrows as he took in my appearance. "You look like shit."
I glared at him. "Thanks."
"How is your hand, sissy?" Olivia asked as she tried fitting a cheerio around her finger. She gave up and threw the cheerio down in frustration when it kept breaking into small pieces.
"It's better, gorgeous. Karson helped me feel a lot better," I smiled at my baby sister.
"Oh, I'm sure he did," Braxton cut in, winking as he sat next to me. I glared at him, flipping him off as I realized how dirty that truly sounded. I scoffed in disgust as Colton barked a laugh.
"Fuck you," I mumbled under my breath for only Braxton to hear. He lightly chuckled, patting me on the back as he relaxed in his chair. He kicked his feet in the air and placed his two feet on top of the dining table. He wiggled his toes causing Jace to gag.
"Look who it is!" Braxton yelled, pointing towards the bottom of the stairs. "The gremlin finally woke up!"
"Fuck off," Karson growled as he walked over to us. He looked better than he did last night. His under eye bags weren't as dark and he changed into another set of clothes. The look he held last night was gone, replacing it with a look of hatred. There is the Karson we all knew and loved.
Karson hit the back of Braxton's head as he walked behind my chair. Braxton hissed in pain as he swatted Karson's hand away. Karson sat down at the end of the table, sitting across from Olivia. He never bothered to glance in my direction, he just stared straight ahead.
Before I could force myself to move my eyes away from him, his gaze met mine. He raised one of his eyebrows, smirking as he winked at me. I scoffed in annoyance as I mirrored his smirk.
"Come on, you two," Braxton started, playfully rolling his eyes as he looked between Karson and I. "No eye fucking each other this early in the morning, please."
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Terminal
My heart was shattered that day. It was on that day that I realized that life had an end, and that mine was coming. It was on that day that I realized that I was going to die. Leukemia, they told me. It's almost over. I didn't know what to do after that. I thought that maybe it would be best to die right then, get it over with. I thought that I could push myself away from all my friends, all my family, stop them from missing me after I was gone. I thought that I could handle it on my own, that perhaps the world was better off without me. I was wrong. So please help me, I'm dying. Save me, I'm falling. They tell me I won't survive. Please catch me, because if you don't, I'll shatter. I can't grab on anymore, I can't keep fighting. It's going to swallow me up. My name is Alyssa Gray, and by the time you finish reading this, I'll be dead. ________________________________ A few warnings and things to note: -I've put up the tramatising content tag due to a lot of mentions on death, dying, illness, and a mother who tends to be rather cruel. I know that I take a perspective that many will strongly disagree with, and I'm okay with that. Just be warned that this isn't lighthearted stuff. This is real, and death is real, and this part streaches beyond the fiction into reality. -I'm going to say a minor spoiler, but I don't want it to take you unaware because it is something to be aware of. At one point, my MC attempts suicide and fails. It's a very violent scene and I will put up the gore tag after writing this, and it's also just really depressing. If this will be triggering, you need to be aware of this before you read it. -This is a christian book. It may go against some of your beliefs. I hope that you can read and comment anyway even if some of it does not sit well with you. Credits for the cover go to the user 'Media in Sanity'. Your help and assitance has meant so much to me, God bless you in your writing and your endevours. A proud member of WriTE. I've promised to finish this fiction and update it at least once a month. My schedule is very irregular, and I'm working on that, but I'm going to do everything I can to make sure that this book stays out there. I'm not ending it until it's done.
8 177Stranded
Sinclair brothers x a stranded bimbo reader.
8 181Collateral Damage
Alexander Sullivan is the CEO of a financing company, who despite his better judgment, lends out a considerable sum to a desperate man. Sure enough the man is injured, and with no assets, and no property offers up his only daughter as collateral. Alexander is hesitant to take her, not wanting to be apart of such a shady arrangement. He offers a new contract, giving her time to pay her fathers debts off. However, he finds himself attached to her, and wanting to stake his claim more than he thought he would.
8 126Coach Y/LN (Meagan/You) ✔️
Y/N Y/LN is a high school girls basketball coach. She was once a young striving athlete looking to enter the WNBA. She had everything she ever wanted until one of her biggest supporters was torn away from her. They try to make it work through long distance but things happen and it ends badly.Years later they meet again and everything comes at Y/N full force. Things are uncovered and a huge life change takes place. Can Y/N get the life she's always wanted, or will things get in the way?Y/N is g!p (intersex)Mature ContentCover created by @Rocket771
8 200His Name Was Tate
"Why do you keep doing stuff like that?" I asked in a whisper.I walk over to him and grab his arm to stop him from painting. His body stiffened under my touch, and I couldn't help but smile at his reaction. "What do you want from me, Tate?" I asked arms made its way around his waist. I could feel my stomach jump to my throat. I laid my head on his back, rubbing my face against him. Engulfing myself in his scent. My heart began to pound uncontrollably but I quickly regain control before I continued. "Earlier today you said you'd never see me more than a friend." His breathing was uneven. Like he was nervous. "But the way you look at me, the way you talk to me? They say something completely different." He became even more ridged under my touch. I could help but giggled at his demeanor. The usual cool, collected Tate was now at my mercy. "Do you want me as a friend-" I said in a whisper. I began to become more bold and allowed my hands to travel. They landed over his chest and I could feel his heart thumping und my hand. While the other hand glided over is abs. "-or do you want me?" I asked.He removed my hands off of him and turned so that he was facing me. The look in his eyes rocked me to my core. There was a hunger in them. And it terrified me, but in a good way. In a way I wanted to explore. A smile soon crossed his lips. He was so close that I could feel his breath. "Your treading on dangerous waters, Little owl." He said in a low tone that made my body shiver. I ignored the pounding in my head and lungs and began to move a little closer so that our bodies were flushed against each other. His arms wrapped around me quickly holding me against him. "I like danger." I said in a whisper. "I know what I want." I said I'm a drunken daze. "And what is that?" He said in a chuckle."You."Read up on the love story of Tate and Meloni. Will this cool and calculated playboy be able to resist the charms of the innocent yet strong girl with a deadly secret?
8 198Becoming His Male Empress (BxBxMPREG)
SECOND CHANCES, I didn't believe in it, I have never been known to the world, I was born disfigured, useless and without a name. To the General, my father I should never have been born, I was conceived by a maid and caused his most beloved wife to never forgive him.Hidden and forgotten until I was needed to take my sisters' place, she was to become the Emperor's Empress as I was made to believe but eloped with her lover. A crime that will lead to the death of nine generations of the general's family descendants, therefore I was made to take her place and if caught I will have to take the blame and say it was due to my GREED.I wondered why the General's manor will allow a disfigured person like me to pose as my sister but before marrying the Emperor, I was assassinated, I heard my killers say " this way the generals manor will never be caught since the empress elect to be was assassinated before arriving at the imperial palace", they never planned on letting me enter the palace, I was their scapegoat to save their necks but I never thought I will get a second chance at life, a second chance to change my fate. In my past life, I was born to never be loved but to be used and discarded but not in this life, I don't care if I am not loved but I won't be used and discarded.BOOK COVER BY @silentscarlettt#Please note that NONE of the artworks/pictures in this story belongs to me, I DID NOT DRAW THEM and all credit goes to the artist but NOTE that the story itself is my ORIGINAL WORK, Also I am an Amateur writer so read at your own risk.COPYRIGHT LAWS APPLIESPLEASE DON'T REPOST THIS STORY ANYWHERE WITHOUT MY EXPRESS PERMISSION.I CAN NEVER GIVE ANYONE PERMISSION TO POST THE ENGLISH VERSION OF THIS STORY ANYWHERE AND IF I WHERE TO POST IT SOMEWHERE I WILL TELL MY READERS WHERE THAT WILL BE, SO IF YOU SEE IT PLEASE LET ME KNOW. THANKS.#boyslove- 12/06/18-highest ranking #1HF-30/09/18-highest ranking #01
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