There are a few things that I know I don’t know about Lilith.

I knew that she and God had a falling out before I was born, and I knew that the falling out had nothing to do with her leaving Heaven without permission nor did it have anything to do with her being unwilling to be with Uncle Adam, but I knew it was bad.

One time, when I was playing with one of the souls in Heaven, we accidentally knocked over a box at Lilith’s and my place. A bracelet made out of leaves and grass fell out of it, and I thought it was weird because it was green and healthy even though it must’ve been at least a couple of centuries old. I remembered thinking that it was beautiful, and I was about to reach for it when Grandpop stopped me and magically dragged me out of the house. The soul I was playing with was right behind me.

Grandpop told me that He did that because He wanted to play with us that day, but when I got home, I noticed that the bracelet had been put away and a new safe had been installed in the house at a spot where I was too short to reach. Lilith acted like it was nothing, but there were no thieves in Heaven, so why did Lilith build a safe

9-year-old me hadn’t learned how to deal with curiosity because I hadn’t gone through puberty yet, and I couldn’t control my hormones and synapses. In the end, I kept staring at Lilith during dinner even though she tried to distract me with potato chips and ice cream.

“It was my… negligence,” confessed Lilith.

“I wasn’t curious!” I was a little too loud and too quick to answer, “I was just admiring the safe because it’s so… big and… shiny.”

Lilith stared at me with a raised brow. I held on for as long as I could before I confessed.

“I was a tiny bit curious.”

Lilith chuckled and patted my head.

“It’s normal to be curious,” Lilith said, “You’re still young.”

I cuddled up in Lilith’s arms then. “What do you mean by ‘negligence’? Is that bracelet my sibling?”

“No, silly,” said Lilith as she kissed my forehead, “That is a gift from a friend. She… She’s not around anymore because I… uhm… I didn’t pay enough attention to her, and she got lost because of it.”

“Why not just go look for her?” I asked then sat up as a brilliant idea hit me, “I know, I’ll sneak into Grandpop’s courtyard to see if I can find anything out!”

“You just want to play by the Forbidden Tree again, don’t you?”

“No… Maybe… Yes…”

Lilith laughed as I pouted.

I forgot all about the bracelet the next day, and went around heaven, wreaking havoc and skipping class as I usually did.

______________________________________________________________________

I haven’t thought about that bracelet until Lilith takes it out of her closet as Michael and I are discussing wind velocity. Lilith is pulling a heavy suitcase that she had made out of thin air in one hand and is holding a transparent box with the bracelet in it in her other hand. Michael seems taken aback when he sees that bracelet, but he doesn’t mention anything.

“Hey, mom,” I say, “Uncle Michael and I were just discussing wind velocity. I think the best way out of the island is by walking North, but Uncle Michael thinks East is easier.”

“Go South,” ordered Lilith, “The False Messiah is probably waiting for you there. Tell him I’m not in a good mood and if he walks in again, I will kill him.”

“Mom, killing’s a sin,” I complain.

“So is taking a daughter away from her mother,” Lilith says then looks up at the sky, “But someone doesn’t seem to mind committing it!”

“Well, you’re gonna be fun to be around,” comments Michael.

Michael and I laugh together.

“Shut up,” orders Lilith before she turns to me. She grips the bracelet tighter in her hand before she says, “Michael, would you mind giving me and my daughter some space?”

“Sure,” Michael says before he gets up to fly away, “I’ll get dinner ready.”

“Thank you,” Lilith says but it seems like she is thanking him for leaving rather than for dinner. When Lilith turns to me, she smiles and says, “I packed you some food, some water, some armor, some weapons – don’t abuse them, some winter wear, some summer wear, some…”

“Mom,” I interrupt her before she goes on, “I’ll be fine.”

“You say that, but you’ve never dealt with any other humans before, and the demons… they can be… overwhelming,” warns Lilith.

“I’m human,” I remind Lilith, “I can literally kill them with my mind.”

“No!” shouts Lilith.

“Calm down, mom. I’m not actually going to kill anyone. I know it’s a sin,” I roll my eyes at Lilith, “I just meant that I am more than capable of defending myself.”

“Just… don’t project your thoughts into the demons… or the fallen angels. I don’t want you to open your mind to them.”

“Why not?” I asked, “That’s like one of the best perks of being a human. Besides, the only one that might be powerful enough to turn the tables on me is the Devil… and maybe the False Messiah?”

Lilith has turned so pale that she looks like one of the Daughters of Eve. I reach out to hold her hand and send minor vibrations through our touch to help calm her anxiety and regulate her hormones. It works for a while, but Lilith withdraws her hand before I can remove her anxiety completely. I don’t understand why she does that, but I am used to it because every time I helped her with her anxiety she would say the same thing over and over again.

“Mothers need to worry,” Lilith says, “It’s in our nature.”

“And normally, I’d be okay with that, but I get the feeling that your anxiety is in your way this time,” I say before I look to the bracelet that Lilith is holding. Lilith reacts by hiding the bracelet again, “Mom, I’m not 9 anymore. In fact, I haven’t been 9 in a while now. No matter what you have to say, you can say it because I won’t judge you or love you any less.”

I reach out to hold Lilith’s hand again before I continue to say what I need to say, “Because you taught me to be better than that.”

Lilith smiles at that, but she still sounds nervous as she says, “I won’t be so sure if I were you.”

“Come on, how bad could it be? Were you responsible for Lucifer’s fall? If so… no judgment from me, and I still love you all the same,” I say, “Us humans can be pretty amazing when we want to be.”

“That’s the thing…” says Lilith, “You’re not human.”

“……”

Typical humans sometimes receive new information so wild that their brains had to pause to take some time to register and analyze the information that they had just received. They call it being surprised.

For someone like me, surprises are… rare. I had been living in Heaven and was tutored by the best that Heaven has to offer so I am able to realize my full potential and could anticipate/predict most things before they happen.

One of the more maternal souls in heaven tried to throw me a surprise birthday party when I was eight years old. Not only did I saw it coming before she even started planning for it, I asked for a unicorn-shaped cake. That started a decade-long experiment in Heaven where dozens of souls got together to try and surprise me every year on my birthday, but they kept failing until Grandpop got involved with my surprise on my 18th birthday.

Lilith’s confession feels even more far-fetched than the surprise that God had personally planned.

I frown at Lilith’s words. Then, I look at my hand… REALLY look at it. My eyes zoom in ways that a typical human couldn’t, and I checked everything, even my DNA, and… everything looks good. They look similar to Lilith’s, and since she never ate the Forbidden Fruit, she is the very definition of ‘human’ so…

“How exactly am I not human?” I ask.

“You are. From my side,” Lilith says before she takes a deep breath and continues, “But you have two parents.”

I deliberate for a long moment before I reply, “Yeah, now that you mention it, you getting pregnant after drinking a potion is a pretty obvious lie.”

Lilith stares like she doesn’t know what to say, but if I’m being honest, I’m more upset about believing in Lilith’s lie. I mean, I can’t choose my parents, but believing in a lie? That is practically the definition of ‘dumb’.

Still, this isn’t the time to be upset about my intelligence, not when Lilith is struggling the way she is.

“I’m fine with it, mom. So I’m not human. My physical and mental capabilities never defined me anyway. I am still me,” I reassure Lilith, “What am I though? And do I want to know who my dad is?”

“No, you don’t want to know who your other parent is,” answers Lilith. I am not surprised by her response because if she kept me in the dark about it for so long, it must’ve been someone really bad.

“So I am a half-human and a half…?”

“A half… angel.”