"Was bittersweet to say the least

One life begins, one comes undone"

✦

Like he said he would, Harry had waited.

A quarter of an hour later I was back at the porch, dressed and only physically ready to go on this walk with Harry and Bear. He was crouched down sillily ruffling Bear's ears.

"There she is," he cooed to the dog in a baby voice.

Bear stood up on four legs at my arrival, his tail wagging and tongue sloppily hanging out of his mouth.

"Hey," I greeted relatively flatly.

He sounded much more excited. "Bonjour!"

I didn't question his French. "Let's go?"

Bear took the lead and we all began walking, me besides Harry.

He kickstarted conversation. "Live with your boyfriend?" No, no, no. He had seen Matt drive away to work.

"No, he's—Matt's my husband." My voice cracked at the last word causing me to grimace.

Harry's eyes widened. "Oh." He glimpsed down to my hands, specifically my left hand. It felt like the ring was on fire.

His reaction was one I was used to since I looked quite young to already be married, especially when Matt and I went out together and I was still in my late teens.

I chose not to expand on the topic. "You moved in with your girlfriend, right?"

"Yeah, her name's Rose." His cheeks deflated and his lips closed.

"Where was she yesterday?" I hoped I wasn't being nosy.

"At her old place, getting stuff together and boxed."

"Where do you guys come from?"

"The Big Apple."

I spoke my immediate thoughts out loud. "What'd you come to a boring suburb like this for?" I asked almost incredulously.

"Well, it stays true to its nickname. That city just never sleeps, it's always go, go, go. Plus, Rose grew up here."

I can't say I remembered a Rose despite the fact that I've lived here my entire life. What was even weirder was that she came back to this rut.

"Isn't that what's nice about it? This town is always asleep. Life is monotonous here, everyday is a rerun of the last," I argued, unsure if I was speaking on behalf of the town or more so myself.

"New York is definitely hectic and sure you'll meet some interesting people, but it didn't feel like home. It's like everything belongs to everybody, making you feel insignificant. There's something nice about a small town; a familiarity you can never grasp there when you're a tiny piece of an ever changing crowd," he elaborated slowly with a low solemn lilt.

I wasn't expecting that, it felt as though he exposed a secret part of himself. "Sorry if I was being nosy."

He grunted.

"What?" I pouted my lips in confusion.

"Stop apologizing, I'm starting to think 'sorry' is your favorite word," he said, sort of jokingly but mostly seriously.

I bit my lip and stayed silent, not knowing how to answer.

"Promise me something—no more apologies."

"But... apologizing is nice?" I asserted but in a questioning manner since I didn't know how else to describe the necessity of apologizing.

"Yeah, when you do something wrong," he drawled in a way that cooperated with his original argument.

"Exactly." I sort of wanted to roll my eyes, he wasn't making sense.

"You didn't though." He continued hesitantly, "I think your just subconsciously seeking a sense of validation and approval... assurance that your not doing anything wrong."

If only he knew I had been. I'd been doing everything so wrong that my husband didn't want me anymore. I was no longer enough.

I let out a shaky breath and Bear halted to growl at an innocent squirrel, so we stopped strolling.

"I don't mean to offend you, so I'm sorry if I did." How ironic.

I tried to lighten the mood. "So it's fair for you to say sorry, but not me?"

Bear began his trot again.

"Well, I might've actually crossed a boundary for only knowing you a couple days," he said reluctantly.

"It's okay." I held my hands behind my back, twisting the ring but keeping it snug in its spot.

"Still, no more apologies, okay?"

"Alright," I conceded with a purposefully exaggerated huff.

He grinned and stuck out his pinky finger, making me raise my eyebrows in question, but he just waggled it around. The corners of my lips quirked.

I held up my left hand and did as he asked. His slender finger wrapped around my own for a fleeting second, pressing against the ring as it did.

"I've always wanted to live in New York," I revealed, resuming the forgotten conversation.

"You do," he quipped.

I let myself roll my eyes this time. "You know what I mean."

"How come?"

"I like the idea of being a part of something bigger than myself I guess. There's always something to focus your attention on, but here most of the times the most interesting thing going on is your own life."

"But don't you know everyone? I'd imagine you'd feel comfortable or at home everywhere since you know the people well and nothing changes drastically."

"The local florist or deli worker knowing my name and order by heart just isn't significant to me. People may know those things about me but it doesn't really mean anything since I'm not close with them. At the end of the day I'm just a passing face; someone they'd forget if I didn't show up ever again. Other than putting cash in their pockets often, I don't have an impact on them."

Harry brushed his free hand through his hair and narrowed his eyes.

"I mean, that's not the experience for everybody obviously... I think whether I live in a place with a million people or a hundred people, I'll still just fade into the background." My volume withered as I finished and my cheeks warmed up. I wished I could take back what I said. It was too personal. Did it sound like I was begging for pity?

"You have a habit of trivializing your own worth," he proclaimed while tightening his grasp on the leash. "People only know surface level details about you because that's all you let them know, not because they don't care."

Bear stopped again to investigate a dense, leafy bush.

I bit the inside of my cheek. He barley knew me, how would he know? Matt knew me quite well and it was easy enough for him to favor new company. Better company.

"You have a habit of romanticizing strangers." I forced a smile.

He shrugged with his lips pressed together. "Maybe, maybe not."

We watched Bear without a word until he finished his search and led us along our undirected journey.

"I actually have a habit of being right," he bantered. "We'll just have to get to know each other to verify this."

An actual smile slathered across my face. Harry opened his mouth as if to say something when mine spread but proceeded to close it.

"I guess so." I wasn't fidgeting with my ring anymore.

"We can start off slow before we get into the nitty gritty stuff." I gulped but he continued on. "Favorite movie?"

I contemplated his question for a moment.

"Actually, wait—lemme guess!"

"Go for it," I said even though there wasn't really a correct answer.

"Um... the Titanic?" He guessed confidently.

I disagreed immediately. "Definitely not. Jack saves Rose from her awful fiancé and then she just takes up the whole door and lets him drown—who knows where he would've ended up if he hadn't met her, maybe actually alive. It's messed up."

Harry processed my short rant. "He just wanted to get her out of the ocean as much as possible so she wouldn't freeze," he glanced over and met my eyes, "even if he died in the process—that's how much he loved her. He wouldn't let her die. He'd rather take the fall than go on without her and that was the best bet of achieving that."

We broke the intensifying eye content and looked ahead and pondered over his words. Matt would do the same right?

"Well, if love amounts to sacrifice, Rose must have not truly loved him, or at least not as much. She would've insisted he latched on too otherwise, whether that meant they still both sunk in the end or not. She sort of prioritized herself, so I wonder if she really loved him."

"Maybe she knew she would be fighting a losing war even if she tried," he contended.

"Or maybe it was an artistic choice and maybe just a scene movie with fictional characters who didn't actually make decisions for themselves."

We both chuckled lightly. "It wouldn't be the Titanic if he didn't die," he concurred.

"Hey—wait! Rose is your girlfriends name, it's too bad yours isn't Jack." My lips broadened and I let them reveal my teeth.

"Yeah..." He intently watched his feet, letting Bear act as his guide.

I almost nudged him with my shoulder but resisted. "Don't worry, I'm sure she'd let you on the door."

He ignored what I said. "So what's your actual favorite movie then?"

"I'm not sure," I admitted.

"More of a TV show person?"

"No, I'm even less of that kind of person."

"Why's that?"

I sighed. "My hu—Matt hates TV shows. He gets bored easily and just likes a quick concise story line, not something drawn out and lengthy." My smile slipped. "So, we would watch movies together instead."

"Do you like shows?"

"Yeah, it makes me sad when movies finish, I always just wish they wouldn't stop when I like the characters. As weird as it sounds I sort of miss 'em."

"No, I'm the same way," Harry dismissed my worries. "I'm in it for the long run."

"Me too..." I trailed off. Matt wasn't. But he used to be.

By now we had made it out of the development and were near the park I was at yesterday.

"I want to take you somewhere," Harry said, breaking the comfortable silence.

I quirked my eyebrow at his abrupt eagerness. "Okay?"

"So, another reason I moved here was so I can finally open up my shop."

"What's your shop?"

"A thrift store—it's where we bumped into each other yesterday." His smile was growing wider and wider as he elaborated about the store.

"That's so cool," I complimented honestly. He was passionate about it, I'd never felt that way about anything before. Except Matt.

"Yeah, I moved as soon as the space was available. It's not open yet, but I want to show you."

I wondered why he wanted to show me, but the fact that he did was flattering. "Thanks."

By now we had made it to the park I had been at yesterday, meaning we were only a couple minutes away from the his store.

"Why a thrift store?" I spoke my thoughts out loud.

Harry rubbed his chin with his hand and pulled on his bottom lip. "Well... I've always loved thrifting and vintage clothing and what not. I also am sort of into the environment."

"Vegan?" I surmised.

"No," he chortled. "The fashion industry is a leading source of pollution though."

"Oh."

"Yeah, so I've tried to buy recycled clothing as much as possible. The fact that you'll find old interesting pieces is just a plus."

Just then I noted his outfit. He was wearing slightly baggy jeans and a loose worn in band tee.

"You like fashion a lot?"

"I'm no fashion designer, but I've always been more into my style than others," he shrugged.

I've never been particular about my own style as it was never something I really cared for. "I like that."

Harry laughed. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. I could wear a potato sack for all I care. But, I admire those who put effort into it and exhibit individuality in what they wear," I elaborated.

Maybe that why Matt didn't love me. I dressed horribly. And I have no sense of individuality.

"Thanks. I'm into vintage clothing. The fit, the charm. I just like it."

I nodded in understanding. We were getting closer.

"Have you always wanted your own store?"

"Since I realized university wasn't for me."

I wished I went to college. I'm not sure what I would've gone for, but I just wished I could have.

We stood outside of it. Thrifted Styles.

"Get it, cause Styles is my last name." Harry Styles.

I let my lips curve as they pleased at his childlike glee. "I do. It's clever."

He unlocked the doors to the small store sandwiched in between two others.

Upon entering the first thing I noticed was the fairy lights strung from the ceiling, which he plugged in causing a cozy illumination.

Boxes were strewn about, which Bear had been sniffing through, dragging his leash, and a couple empty clothing racks were piled against the back wall. A checkout counter sat in the middle of the the wall to the right.

Once I finished looking around I looked back to Harry. He was studying me.

If the lights weren't causing some kind of illusion, I would've sworn he had a slight rosy tint to his dimpled cheeks. "I know there's not too much to it yet..." He trailed off, brushing his fingers through his hair.

"But it'll get there," I finished for him.

"That it will."

⇢ ⇢ ⇢

sorry if this is boring

there's not much action buttt

we're getting to know the characters

better here and building the

relationship... drama will come ;)

thank you for 3.5k reads

I practically exploded once I saw that

peace out ☺