"I shouldve listened to my momma and never let you in my life!"

I woke up hearing Gina's voice fade away repeating the same sentence over and over. I had to take a cold ass shower to cool off cause my body felt like inferno on Earth. I Changed my sheets to dry ones since I sweated a rain storm through the whole night. "I made my own key to yo house by the way" Peanut popped his head in with a bowl of cereal in his hand.

I stopped dead in my tracks with a confused look plastered on my face. "Nigga when did you do that?" I asked.

He scooped some milk and cereal onto his spoon and inserted it into his mouth,pulling the spoon out, and placing it back in the bowl. "Lastnight" he said in a duh tone while crunching loudly. From where I stood this nigga ate some of my Cinnamon toast crunch cereal.

I didn't have time to fight this nigga for stealing my keys or my cereal so I just strolled into my walk in closet, shutting the door behind me to get dressed.

"Shit as much as you call us over...

we deserve a key" Peanut yelled through the door.

*

"Ginnaaa" I say in a sing song tune making her giggle after she opened the door to reveal a giddy me with a box of pizza and DVDs at hand. I decided to go spend time with her since I ain' have shit else to do. She said her momma wouldn't be home for the whole day so I could come chill with her.

We went in her room instead of her living room cause she said its more comfortable in her bed than the couch that was covered with plastic. I didnt argue and only followed her to her purple room. It was nicely decorated, fit for a girl like Gina. A book shelf full of books, her own computer desk and a bed that could fit two to three people.

Gina took one of my dvd cases that held different movies and popped the DVD into the player. I opened the top of the pizza box lid, handing Gina a paper plate.

The movie played as we ate in silence but I couldnt help to not stare at Gina most of the time through the whole movie. She had a smile that I couldnt get over.

I could never show or tell her how I feel. It would only leave me vulnerable to attack and my last relationships taught me to act as if I didnt have a heart but as of right now, I was slipping up because of her. She got some sauce on the side of her cheek making me want to inform her that she to wipe it off.

"Gina" I said getting her attention, I pointed at where the sauce was located. "You got a little sumn sumn".

"Oh damn" she said lifting her fingers up to wipe it off, but kept missin where it was. I decided to wipe it off with my thumb. She looked dumbfounded and stuck when I placed my thumb on her cheek softly to wipe it all up. I got napkin, cleaned the sauce off my thumb, and trash bucket the now used tissue. She thanked me and I just nodded my head.

The movie was about a hour and twenty minutes long. And just when I was about to pop another movie in, Gina looked at the time and jumped up, almost tripping off the bed. "My mom gonna be home in any minute you gotta go!" She urged dashing out the room. I chuckled, not looking to clean up and only walked out the room.

She held the door open and I smiled at her. "You know, I had a nice time" she said tipping her head side way with her hands on her hips when I entered the hallway and turned around. I leaned forward to kiss her cheek only to whisper "me too, Gina". I heard her breath hitch abruptly confirming that I did have an effect on her.

"Bye" she said closing the door slowly. "Bye" I repeated, walking down the steps. Realizing she never closed the door and watched me leave until I was outside.

*

"Soft pussy bitch" Peanut shouted with each word. I threw one of my tennis balls at him which landed on his head.

"Do you want me to call my momma again?" He asked, glaring at me. I shrugged and threw another one at me. I wonder what Gina doing right about now.

"Im gonna go see Gina" I said grabbing my keys. Chris sucked his teeth "nigga you was just there" he said looking at my hand that held the keys. "So?" I scrunched my face up. "So.. nigga calm down before she take you as one of them soft hood niggas" Chris said texting on his phone. I rolled my eyes up to the ceiling and set the keys down.

From the start, I didnt want to make it seem like she was making me soft and here I was, seeing her twice in one day. I couldnt get enough of Gina. I enjoyed her company like it was comforting. Texting her asking if she wanted to facetime made my heart beat quickly, knowing I'd get to see her face once more. "Nigga you need to get hard again" Peanut said plucking behind my neck.

"Ouch, dumb bitch" I said sending him my meanest look while rubbing the back of my neck where he plucked me. "I like her and her company thats all" I confessed, hoping she wouldnt hear it as I was facetiming her at that moment.

"Nigga make her chase you for once" Peanut grumbled while opening my refrigerator. "Hey Kay" Gina said sweetly.

"Hey kayy" Peanut made his voice girly clearly mocking her, I lifted my fist up making him flinch and run to the couch. "You okay?" I asked looking at her curly hair dangle over her forehead. She nodded while smiling. I loved how her dimples showed themselves to me. Chris appeared behind me in the camera in the corner, smiling goofily.

"That's Chris right?" She asked.

"Yeah Lil Kay" He confirmed for me just when I was about to. "He inlo-..oof!" I elbowed his stomach and felt his presence disappear from behind me. He coughed continuously and kept repeating "you fucking bitch".

"What you doing tomorrow?" I asked hoping she'd say nothing. "Uh, I got work from 9-5" she informed me. My baby work. "I'll pick you up from ya job which is..?" I told her, waiting for her to tell me where she worked.

"Intern at a model agency" she finished.

"You should be one of the models" I said setting my head into the palm of my hand. "Yo, I gotta tell you something real quick" Peanut said standing beside me with a look that said 'hang up'. I nodded my head and averted my attention back to Gina. "Just call me later" She said smiling. "Aight ma" With that said I hung up.

"We gotta shoot up somebody business in a hour" he informed me cutting his phone off. "Im not even gonna ask why" I said sighing. The van that held all our guns was parked in the back way was already loaded. Peanut only got serious when it came to business so he was already out the door while we got informed late about the mission.

"Lets roll out" Chris said, and we were on our way.

*-*

"Nigga get up!" I shouted at Peanut trying to sound brave and not effected about what just happened. He was shot in his stomache when we pulled up to our target's business. He shook his head to side as blood slipped from his mouth. I looked up and seen Chris still shooting at the building where the shooters were.

Chris ducked and looked back at Peanut with sadness written all over his face.

"We gotta get him to a hospital. NOW" he yelled. I nodded my head, going around Peanut's body to drag him into the back of the van. "Cover me!" I shouted to Chris. He began shooting once more before running to the drivers seat.

"Stay alive brother" I said patting Peanut's cheek. He grinned, with blood staining his teeth. "Aye'.. I hope you and that girl become one happy family bro" he said coughing.

"Naw bro, you gon' be apart of that family man whatchu' saying dont talk like that" I said patting his face a little harder. "Nigga stop slapping me" he grunted. I stopped and chuckled.

A tear slipped from my eye, landing on his head. " and stop crying too damn" he said jokingly. I wiped my eyes quickly to shake off the fact I was crying.

"Like I said man..one big happy family..." he said drifting off, glancing up at the ceiling. "Peanut?" I said widening my eyes. "Ayo Peanut get up!" I yelled watching him never blink his eyes.

I felt the bulge in my throat rise as hot tears spilled from my eyes. "Shit!" Chris shouted in defeat, hitting the steering wheel. My vision was blurry as I pulled his eyelids down. Sobbing loudly, I held him close to me.

"My brotha' man..."

*-*

"Make sure the body can't be found" I said weakily to Chris who only nodded before pulling off with Peanut in the back covered up with a blanket.

I walked into my apartment complex emotionally drained. Locking my door behind me, I felt my phone vibrate.

Slipping my phone out, Gina's caller ID popped up. I couldn't talk to nobody right now. I just lost my boy and im fucked up for life.

She left a voicemail minutes later and I decided to listen to it. Atleast I didn't have to answer her concerned questions.

"Heyyyy.. umm, I was just calling to ask if you were okay... i seen Chris pull up at a light.. and he started crying on the spot.. and Yeah.. you okay? You can tell me anything.. Im a good listener and well.. yeah.. call me when you get this or something. Bye Kayden".

I wiped my eyes vigorously as I imagined Chris crying at the light. We really fucked up right now. I need somebody right now. Peanut been my boy since forever, and just losing him just like that caused a tear in my heart. I done lost half of me in one day. So I tap a view things on my phone , and the next thing I know, Gina's at the door.

*-*

"Damn..." she whispered, sitting beside me on the couch. I nodded my head slowly, fighting back the urges to cry. I can't cry in front of a girl. I bawled my fist up, digging my nails into the palm. She seen this and placed her hands on mine.

"Let it out Kay.." she said softly. I started breathing rapidly, she held her arms out and I entered her embrace. I felt like a big baby by the way she was holding me.

My head was placed on her chest. Her arm was directly under my neck as she held me. I sobbed out loud clenching onto her arm. It felt so hard to breathe, but it felt a little easier knowing she was here for me. She wiped the tears off my cheeks as I sniffled. "He was my other half Gina" I said, interrupted by my hiccuping. She hummed a tune while caressing my cheeks.

I felt sleepy, quickly getting up. I grabbed her hand and led her to my bedroom. I wasnt in the mood for sex. It would be more comfortable and warmer if we laid in here.

She got on the bed without a word, taking her flats off. I slipped my shirt off and jeans. Gina watched me intently as I walked towards her. Pulling the covers back, we both slid under.

I placed myself beside of her but keeping my upper body on her. My head placed onto her chest and my arm wrapped around her stomache as I listened to her heart beat.

She began to caress my face and it put me to sleep as my mind kept repeating Peanut's words just before he died in my arms:

big happy family

One happy family.

One big family

One .. big.. happy..