《I am a Spy》Pheromone lack problem
Advertisement
Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
It was a rainy Monday, on the most famous street in Rio de Janeiro... In the view of best buddies Enzo Carvalho and Vinicius Valverde, obviously. But our heroes were not at their homes tonight, but a few miles away, after watching a movie in one of the many movie theaters in the city. The decision to go to the farthest one in the capital was Enzo's fault, of course. And better: he did not explain to Vini why he had chosen that theater. And it didn't take long for their situation to go from bad to worse.
- Enzo, could you do me a favor and get some change for the bus?
- We don't need any change, just wait for the bus from our condominium to come by.
- It's 11:50, Enzo.
- And?
- So, unless you've hired a private driver to pick us up in the middle of the night in this hellhole, we're going to have to use the ordinary buses.
Enzo didn't really understand the situation, or what Vini had told him. Or even both.
- And how do we do this?
- What's this we thing? I just want you to change the bloody money. The driver probably won't have change, so let's make it easy for him.
- Aye, aye, Captain.
Enzo walked away from Vini, who waited patiently, alone, at a bus stop, without any cars or a lost soul.
- I got a date.
It was Vini's turn to be confused.
- Excuse me?
- I got a date. - Enzo repeated.
- How did you get a date? I just asked to go and change the money!
- Well, I didn't know exactly what to say and there was a very pretty unaccompanied girl. I asked her in my own sly way, and that was it!
Advertisement
As they climbed the stairs, the bus driver, a bald, black man with a wrinkled white shirt and a black tie, took the money from Enzo and smiled, after hearing Enzo's last sentence.
- Nice one, kid. - He said.
As both sat down on the bench in the back of the bus, Vini continued with his rants about dating and romantic life in general.
- You must be the only person who will exchange the money on the bus and ludicrously somehow gets along well.
- That's the difference between you and me, pal. - Enzo sat down next to him.
- The fact that I know what I'm doing?
Enzo shook his head, ignoring the provocation.
- Don't worry buddy, I have the solution to your pheromone lack problem.
- I'll give you a hundred bucks if you tell me what pheromones are.
- I don't need to know, dummy, I already have them. And that's what's keeping you from finding a nice gal.
- No, it isn't. The problem is that you have all the luck in the world all to yourself, and every other human being in the galaxy gets fucked because of it.
- What you need is a little confidence, Vini. How about starting with the basics. You want me to talk to Albania?
- Albania? - Vini shook his head. - She's a fucking slut!
- What an ugly, disrespectful word!
- But...?
- Yeah, she's a tramp all the same.
- What are your other options, Connor Mead?
- Well, there's Slovakia, Belgium and Austria.
Vini didn't seem convinced.
- How about Italy? Or Russia?
It was Enzo's turn to let out a brief laugh.
- Buddy, you don't get out of Auto School driving a Ferrari or a Porsche. Unless your parents are really damn stupid.
Advertisement
- What the fuck are you saying?
The bus made a sharp right turn. Instead of explaining, Enzo took advantage of the fact that there were no other passengers but Vini. He got up from his seat and walked over to the driver.
- Where are you going?
- Just follow me, dammit.
- Nothing good came of it after you said "follow me". Enzo ignored and walked to the driver. He tapped him twice on the back to get his attention, which confused Vini and the driver.
- What is wrong? - The driver asked, not comprehending.
- What is your name?
- Leandro.
- That's alright. Leandro, tell me. How many years have you been driving a bus?
- Since I was twenty. Why?
- I just want to prove a point to my horny and fragile friend.
- Oh, the friend without pheromones?
- Yes, yes.
- Shut the fuck up, you idiot. - Vini didn't like it.
- Anyway, could you just get on a bus and drive around like Keanu Reeves in Speed?
- Hell no, I had to take a boring company training course and get my bus driver's license first.
- In other words, you can't just drive a bus. You have to start from the basics.
- I get your point, Enzo, but there was no need to call out to the driver.
- Why not? He also deserves a little fun.
- I concur - Leandro agreed.
Advertisement
- In Serial23 Chapters
Maker Of Power
Reality turns Legend. Legend turns Myth. And Myth vanishes over time. But not these Myths. Not this Legends. Not this Reality. No. These are stories that everyone knows. Stories sang time and time again. Tales of magic powerful enough to rival whole kingdoms. And the people that wield that magic. Everyone knows them. The tale of Velacinir, the Great. The song of Alek, the Skilful. The Legend of Waner, the Lost Smith. The Myth of Kaveli, the Unifier. All people know these things. These Storys, Legends, Myths, Tales, Songs. And mostly everyone thinks they never happened. But they did. And I was part of them. All of them. I was there. I might not have been the one to kill the dragon. The one that found the skill of resurrection. The one that fought whole armies for their family. I might have not been those people but I was there. Because although I may have not done those things, the people that did it weren't created from night to day. They did not just appear. They were taught like everyone else. They were just better at the things that people taught them. That I taught them. Yes. I am not the one that songs are being written about. I may not be the one whose legends perdures even until today. But one thing I am. I am their teacher, their instructor. I am the one that made them what they became. I am... Who am I? I had many names through the ages, but there was one that stuck to me the most. I am the Maker of Power. But like the ones that I thought. I was also a normal person before everything that happened. And this is how it all happened. This is MY Story. MY Legend. MY Myth. MY Song and MY Tale. This is MY beginning. And YOU SHALL LEARN IT. ------------------- Release schedule: Nonexistent.
8 188 - In Serial24 Chapters
Where Dragons Rule: Dissent (old version)
This is an outdated version of the book. The up-to-date version is now available on Amazon Kindle https://www.royalroad.com/amazon/B09MCLS2YC After dragons drove her species to extinction, Aeris, the last Ardelle Celestial dragon has been raised as a pet by humans. Alone in the world and labeled a betrayer of her kind, Aeris must play the deadly game of dragon politics or forever live in isolation. Book 1 of the DRAGON series.
8 421 - In Serial9 Chapters
The Demon Child
Naruto has always been alone in the world. What happens when one day he isn't. A story of how one kind act can forever change the world.
8 158 - In Serial7 Chapters
Off the Vat
Sergeant Gonzal had a very good nose for trouble. But this time, rather than the Cloning vats, the reek of things rotting came from the Mess Hall. *** "Off the Vat" is a complete, very short novel (around 20,000 words across 7 chapters), inspired by the recloning mechanic that Sci Fi MMOs like EVE Online or The Repopulation use to explain why players respawn.
8 155 - In Serial116 Chapters
Animalistic Desires
I do not own the images in this story. What evil lurks in the hearts of most men, or in this case--mythical creatures? Amorous lust, desire, and obsession are what drives these seductively dark mythological beings to possess the reluctant objects of their affections. The human brides they seek belong to them, and only them. They will stop at nothing to make these fair maiden theirs. Even if it means resorting to abduction, seduction, murder, or even disregarding their chosen objects of desire's own free will. Nothing will stop them from claiming the passionate love that they seek.A complication of dark erotic stories of love, desire, passion, obsession, and even horror with supernatural and fantasy elements to fulfill your darkest desires. These seductive monsters are every man's nightmares, and every woman's fantasy. 18 +.Stories may contain trigger Warnings:NudityViolence MurderSexual AssaultAdult Language
8 176 - In Serial20 Chapters
Down (Sequel to Thug Love)
The Thug Passion Continues
8 215

