In spite of it being lunch time, the restaurant was relatively empty save for the waitress cleaning tables. It was an upper-class establishment though a bit run down with chipped tables and dim lighting. The entire place was unremarkable but acceptable. Soft jazz covers of the top hundred radio songs played in the background.

Ellis and Roman sat in a booth across from each other, both picking away at their food. Although Roman had complained more than he ate. Apparently taking Ellis’s car was a personal offense though he wouldn’t actually explain it; He would huff and pout but offer no reason. Even though Roman was being less than pleasant, it was still nice to be there.

“Did the tongue piercing hurt?” Ellis asked as he picked up a piece of sushi with his chopsticks

“Like a bitch.” Roman replied.

“Worse than your ears?”

“Yeah.” Roman nodded. “I actually ended up having the hoop in my left ear ripped out while I was at camp. Not fun, needed stitches.”

It was rare that Roman offered information about his time away or what had led up to him leaving. Over time, it had become a point of curiosity for Ellis but he hadn’t built up the courage to ask him. Mostly because he wasn’t sure if he really wanted to know. As much as he and Roman disagreed, he didn’t want harm to come his way.

“I don’t like it. Take it out.” Ellis waggled his finger at Roman.

“And I don’t like that you only wear the school uniform but I live with it.” He stuck out his tongue. “Out of our friends, I am not even close to the worst decision maker.” Ellis only half disagreed with him

“I assume you're talking about Fletcher. He told me about the night of the wake-a-thon.” Ellis paused to eat another piece of sushi. “What do you think about the whole thing?”

“Kid needs a wakeup call but he’ll never listen to me.” Roman used his hands to eat his food. Ellis took a guess that he didn’t know how to use chopsticks.

“I wouldn’t say-”

“Sorry! You don’t believe in love cause your parents got divorced but the rest of the world isn’t that jaded. Love takes work.” Roman said in a surprisingly good impression of Fletcher. “You can’t tell me that isn’t exactly what he would say.”

“I can talk to him.” Ellis said as Roman adamantly shook his head.

Roman shifted the topic to an obscure story involving a poodle, a swing set and Warren. Of course, Warren would have been there. In the middle of his never-ending monologue, he started to unbutton his dress shirt to reveal his white undershirt. God he’s so weird, Ellis thought although he found it a little endearing. As Roman crumpled the shirt into a ball, Ellis noticed a thin but long white scar that ran along his forearm and a deeper scar on his inner arm.

“What happened there?” Ellis pointed with his chopsticks

“Oh this?” Roman pointed at the thin scar. “Car surfing with Warren. In hindsight neither of us had our license yet so probably shouldn’t have done that.”

On many levels, Roman concerned Ellis. The self-destructive moments had been building up Roman’s entire life and it seemed as he got older the moments became more frequent and life threatening. Ellis usually went back and forth with the reasoning; he couldn’t decide if Roman was just stupid or if he lacked the foresight to understand he wasn’t invincible. Perhaps he was aware and didn’t care. It didn’t matter in the end, there was no fixing Roman’s devil-may-care attitude.

“What about the other one?”

“Uh...” Roman twisted his arm to look at the scar. The placement was suspicious with the scar being tightly tucked away under his upper arm. It didn’t seem like a place one could easily get hurt. “Camp.”

Awkwardly, Roman smiled before reaching over and grabbing a piece of sushi off Ellis’s plate with his grubby hands. Ellis stabbed him with a chopstick. He only laughed in reply and tossed his head back. The song switched to something familiar but Ellis couldn’t remember the name. Loudly, Roman sang along without a care in the world nor shame. Part of Ellis thought it was incredibly embarrassing but there was something magnetic about him. In small doses, Ellis understood what other people liked in Roman; his strong sense of self and little care for what people thought of him.

“Aren’t you worried? With the visions of you drowning?” Ellis said, hoping to end the singing.

“No way. I’m a great swimmer. If you recall, I do believe I kicked your ass at swim.” Roman said with a halfcocked grin.

“You beat me once by half a second, I’d hardly say you were better than me.” Ellis paused “I suppose the vision may not be literal. Symbolic of something, maybe?”

“Hey, you’re the one with magic powers, not me. Anyways, are we carpooling to the tunnels or are you going to give me a ride?”

“We can go together provided you promise not to sing in public anymore.”

“Deal.” Roman said with a soft laugh.

***

When they arrived at the tunnels, Sam and Fletcher were already there. Sam outstretched on the hood of a baby blue bronco from the 60’s. Ellis assumed it must have belonged to his parents. The Schuyler’s owned an extensive collection of vintage cars. Fletcher leaned his hip against the car while waving his hands around clearly frustrated about something. Ellis parked the car close to the tunnel entrance.

“You’re late. Again.” Sam snipped as he launched himself off the hood. “Did you pull the fire alarm too?”

“Nope, I’d guess an angry eight grader. Those kids have no fear or morals.” Roman shot back. “Actually-”

“Roman.” Fletcher said with venom in his voice. “Are you deaf or stupid?”

Roman first looked to Ellis then to Sam as if he was checking for something. His expression shifted quickly from anger to acceptance. Just as he was about to speak, he stopped again. Slowly, his chest rose and fell as Fletcher glared daggers into his chest. Roman for quite possibly the first time was thinking before he spoke.

“I understand-” He started before Fletcher cut him off with a shushing motion.

“I said be civil towards Beck, not to push her around like a rag doll.”

“Yes.” Roman closed his eyes and tilted his head back, almost like a prayer. “I told her politely to stop touching me, she didn’t. I reacted. I understand why you’re upset but I won’t apologize.”

“Fucking typical.” Fletcher snapped. “Let's just go. I’ll get over it. I always do.” There was something more to what Fletcher said but Ellis didn’t have a chance to pry before Fletcher sped into the tunnels. Roman and Sam exchanged a look before following after him.

It took some time for Fletcher to finally calm down enough so that Sam could take the lead. Roman hung to the back. Ellis debated if it was to give Fletcher space or he was looking for an opportunity to leave. The tunnels were damper and colder than usual. The air smelling of mildew and something rotting. Circling around the tunnel, Sam found the same archway they had the first time they’d come to tunnels although Ellis remembered it being closer to the entrance. Sam traced his fingers over the wall before knocking on it. Nothing happened but that was what Ellis expected and what the laws of physics stated.

“What are you thinking?” Ellis asked as Roman and Sam communicated silently.

“Well thinking we need magic words to open it. I mean where else would you keep a spell book besides in a magic tunnel?” Sam explained as if it was obvious. “Open sesame.”

As expected, the wall remained firmly in its place. Roman gave the wall a kick and laughed a bit as if to ease the tension but no one joined him. Fletcher started inspecting it closely, his eyes darting around all the graffiti.

“Witches wouldn’t be dumb enough to actually write the spell on the archway, right?” Fletcher asked.

“Huh? You mean the ‘as above so below’?” Sam asked.

“Yeah, just thought it might have something to do with it. It’s not exactly a match for the rest of the graffiti here.” Fletcher made a good point.

“Well magic boy Sammy-” Roman started.

“Don’t call me Sammy.”

“Sam said it. Didn’t work. What else you got?” Roman’s tone was pleasant but it didn’t match his expression.

As Roman and Sam continued with their feeble attempts to open the door, Fletcher took a big step back and knelt down. He spoke softly, almost inaudible to the air. Ellis took a guess it was the Henry Miller kid that seemingly had become Fletcher’s constant tag along. Slowly, Fletcher stood again and faced the archway and said,

“As above, so below.”

The bricks twisted and warped to create an entrance to pure darkness. Wide-eyed, Roman and Sam turned to face Fletcher who offered no explanation. Confidently, Fletcher strutted into the dark. Following after, Sam tried to keep up. Unlike the other boys, Ellis had foresight. He pulled out his cellphone and turned the flashlight on. A step away from entering the tunnel, he noticed Roman wasn’t following.

“Coming?” Ellis asked as he looked back at him.

“It’s just- It's...Uh...” Roman struggled as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“Dark?” Ellis offered.

“Yes.” Roman said. “And creepy. Plus, ya know, Fletcher’s mad at me...” He was looking for a way out. Permission to leave. Unusual considering he was always asking for forgiveness not permission. Ellis decided not to read into it and to give Roman a little breathing room.

“You can wait in the car, you know?”

Bobbing his head, Roman looked grateful. Ellis waved him off and headed into the darkness. The pitter patter of footsteps echoed through the unexplored tunnel. His flashlight did little help but it was enough to guide him back to Sam and Fletcher who’d pulled out their own phones to see. In the small shine of the light, they looked at wall markings. Ellis recognized them as wiccan symbols but that was no surprise considering where they were.

“Wonder why the door didn’t work for me.” Sam asked quietly but his voice still echoed.

“The wild flowers were a symbol for the Cadière’s family. Maybe only they can open the door.” Ellis guessed. “I mean Fletcher’s family is French. It’s not too far a shot to say they could be related.”

The entire environment changed with the feeling of the unknown hanging above them. Compared to the rest of the tunnels, it was narrower but cleaner. There were no branches off from the main tunnel, it simply led into depths of the dark. Ellis traced his hand along the wall until they reached what felt like a door. Feeling around, he could feel splintering wood and cool metal. He pushed on the handle and entered another room just as dark as before. Ellis reached his hand back and grabbed one of the boy's arms. Based on the boniness, he guessed it was Sam.

“Where-” Sam paused. “How-”

“I don’t know.” Ellis replied unsure of both what Sam was trying to say and anything else going on around them. “Fletcher?” There was no reply.

“Fletch?” Sam’s voice croaked.

Footsteps echoed through the tunnel, making it hard to determine exactly where they came from. Straining his eyes, Ellis tried to see Fletcher. The footsteps were getting closer. Feebly, the two continued to call out for him. Please be Roman, please be Roman, Ellis hoped as the footsteps grew louder.

“Guys?” The moment Fletcher walked over the threshold the room jumped to life. Candles lighting without anyone touching them. “What’s wrong?”

“Where were you?” Sam asked, clearly pretending not to care.

“Behind you. I dropped my phone. Besides the point-” Fletcher said looking around the room. “Where’s this book?”

Lit up, the room was much less ominous. If anything, it reminded Ellis of an attic, overcrowded and filled with junk. The brick walls were lined with rickety shelves. Jars were laid out around the room all filled with herbs or some sort of liquid. In the center of the room was a rotting wooden pedestal with a thick leather-bound book on it. Much like Roman’s journal, the leather had the wildflower symbol imprinted on it.

“Grab it and go. This place gives me the creeps.” Sam said, already walking back towards the main tunnel.

Fletcher grabbed the book off of the pedestal and headed after him. Ellis took a minute to take in the room once more. Something was off putting about it. Perhaps the familiarity was nagging at him. Shaking his head, he decided whatever it was it certainly didn’t matter now.

Navigating out of the tunnel was far easier than in. Ellis followed the dim light outside until he made his way back to the cars. Roman was sitting on the hood of Ellis’s car chewing on licorice. Not only did Ellis find his choice of seat disrespectful, it was the fact that either Roman carried licorice around with him or he went to buy some. Licorice wasn’t even a good snack.

“We got the book.” Fletcher said, holding it up. Roman still chewing, opened his mouth to speak before nodding like a bobble head.

Plopping the book down in the car hood, Fletcher started flipping through looking for the spell Davis asked for. Roman leaned over to look at it while Sam and Ellis hovered around them. About halfway through he found the Obliitus Itsortis page. The words were made up of the English alphabet but Ellis couldn't discern the meaning. Surrounding the passage were more drawings of what looked to be white lilies. Roman dove his face into the book and said,

“Yup that’s Latin.”

“So, you can read-”

“I barely passed, so no.” Roman said with an astounding amount of confidence. “In fact, some would say I only passed because I cheated on the exam.”

“That’s fine. I can figure it out. Either get Ross to translate it or Beck and I can work through it.” Fletcher replied, shutting the book.

“Fun.” Roman replied and looked over to Sam. “Can you drop me back at the school so I can grab my car? I don’t want my mom to figure out I ditched both football practice and school.” Sam nodded along.

“I can give you a ride.” Ellis directed the statement towards Fletcher who still hadn’t fully released the tension between himself and Roman. “So, we get the translation and go from there.

Driving with Fletcher was nicer than being around most people. He was soft spoken but never awkward. There was never a doubt if he wanted to be there or not. Fletcher leaned back in his seat, running his fingers through a curl while complaining about how his hair could never sit the way he wanted it. His curls were one of Ellis’s favorite things about him. It wasn’t the look of them but rather what it meant. Fletcher rarely would let his hair be natural as it seemed to make him anxious but being allowed to it meant he was comfortable. At least that was what Ellis assumed. It wasn’t a long drive but Ellis took his time, taking a backroad just to spend a few more minutes with him.

“I got an email from some university recruiters. I think I have a real shot with the swimming stuff.” The way Fletcher downplayed his accomplishments was an art form or pure delusion. “I have a bunch of meetings set for March break.”

“Any idea where you want to go?” Ellis asked silently, hoping for him to list off the same schools that he’d had been eyeing.

“Not sure. Got to talk to Beck about it. We’re planning to go to the same university so the swim scholarship is pretty important. Don’t think I’d get into the same school as her with my grades.”

Ellis tapped his thumbs against the wheel as he considered what to say. It wasn’t even an argument that Fletcher was brilliant but for some reason he couldn’t see that. In the back of Ellis’s mind was a small voice telling him to explain why following Beck for the rest of his life was a bad idea but Ellis knew better than to say it. Fletcher was sensitive, and any sign of disapproval tended to drive him away. Roman was right, Fletcher wouldn’t listen to them. He’d have to learn on his own. Sitting in the prolonged silence, Ellis kept flapping his mouth open and closed trying to find the words he needed.

“Just say it. Get it over with. You think I’m stupid for staying.” Fletcher practically read Ellis’s mind.

“Yes, but that’s your choice not mine.” Ellis tried to sound diplomatic.

“Nothing else you want to say?”

It sounded like Fletcher was fishing for something but Ellis wasn’t about to indulge him. Ellis had always had a less than stellar opinion of Beck but seeing what she did to Fletcher left him feeling disgusted. She always carried herself as if she was without fault and she forced that perception onto Fletcher. She had him wrapped around her finger. The whole situation left Ellis feeling wronged in some way, though he wasn’t involved. His heart yearned for Fletcher to be happy again, to drop the dejected look that’d become a permanent fixture in his life.

Fletcher didn’t love Beck. He loved the idea of her. That was the only way Ellis could comprehend how it had gone so far.

Pulling off the road, Ellis found a small makeshift dirt parking lot. He assumed it was for ATV riders or something of that sort. He pulled the car to the very back of the parking lot and parked it. He couldn’t keep his opinion to himself any longer.

“Why did you stop?” Fletcher asked but it wasn’t a question.

“Break up with her. Seriously, stop torturing yourself.” Ellis didn’t look at Fletcher right away. He let his words hang for a moment before staring into Fletcher’s eyes. “She cheated on you and you’re just okay with that? I know you think you love her but I think you’re just punishing yourself. She looks at Roman like she used to look at you. I care about you and I can’t stand to see her walk all over you like you’re a doormat.”

“Honestly-” Fletcher’s voice cracked. “I’d expect an ambush from Roman. Not from you. My love life isn’t your business.”

“Okay, yeah it’s not my business but you are still my friend. I don’t think this is good for you.”

Fletcher huffed and surveyed the surroundings before his eyes darted to the door handle. He didn’t make a motion to leave but turned to Ellis with a bored expression. Ellis let out a long breath and rested his head against the steering wheel. Navigating feels wasn’t a strong point of his, but he was willing to try for Fletcher.

“So, you’re alright with the shit she pulls?” Ellis asked

“I love her-”

“That’s not a yes!”

“Compromise is part of relationships- If you want to have this conversation with me, the least you could do is look me in the fucking eyes.” Fletcher sniped as he smacked his hand against the dashboard.

Ellis lifted his head, slowly looking at Fletcher’s scowl. Opinions didn’t matter anymore. What Beck did or didn’t do wasn’t an issue. Fletcher’s inability to be happy because of her was the problem. Ellis would have done anything to make him happy.

“Compromise is who does the dishes, not who you slept with.” Ellis tried to keep his voice even but he could feel the bitterness seeping out.

“You don’t get it.” Fletcher slouched deeper into the seat. “Just take me home.”

“Then explain it! Because I can’t figure out why someone as good as you would do this.”

“I’m not good.” He snorted. “I am mediocre at best, fumbling through life because all I've got is the fact, I can swim faster than the average person. I’m not smart or charming. I’m not even a decent person. After what we did, the only word that should be used to describe me is selfish.”

“Fletch-”

“Beck is as good as it gets for me.” Fletcher paused. “And maybe I deserve that.”

Insecurity was something that Fletcher had been plagued by his entire life but Ellis never realized how deep it ran through him. His perception of himself was so far from the truth. Unbuckling himself, Ellis twisted his shoulders to look Fletcher in the eyes.

“You are beyond good. You are one of the best people I’ve ever met. You’ve never hurt anyone. You’re kind and compassionate. Everyone likes you. Even ignoring your accomplishments, you are fantastic. You are the type of person who can make someone believe in kindness again.”

“We killed someone, Ellis. Nothing I do can redeem me.” Fletcher let out a long sigh.

“That wasn’t your fault. It was mine.”

Fletcher looked at Ellis for the first time in a while. He really looked at Ellis as if he was more than a simple friend. Staring into Fletcher's green eyes, Ellis noticed the pretty flecks of gold laced throughout them. He wasn’t just pretty, he was extraordinary. The way his lips curled into a soft pout, his freckled skin and broad shoulders came together and painted a picture of a boy who was kind yet strong.

Ellis leaned in closer to Fletcher. His heart raced. The smell of flowers and chlorine was overwhelming yet it felt like home. Without a thought, Ellis placed his hand on Fletcher’s shoulder and kissed him. He tasted like chocolate. It was a serene moment, no one else was around, no distractions, not even a sound. It was just the two of them.

Pulling back, Ellis noticed Fletcher furrowed brow and twitching mouth. He tried desperately to speak but the words weren’t there. As the seconds ticked on, Fletcher’s usual calm demeanor faded, replaced by an increasing panic.

Oh no, Ellis thought, I’ve ruined everything.

“I have to go.” Fletcher blurted out as he pulled at the door handle with hands shaking so badly, Ellis was surprised he could even get a grip.

“Wait! I’m sorry. I can still-”

Fletcher slammed the door shut and jogged off in a direction opposite of his house. Ellis laid his head on the wheel and started to rationalize but he couldn’t convince himself that there was a way past his discretion.

“Fuck.”