The… notifications popped into my head the instant I woke up. It was hard to tell what the time was, considering that we were inside a glowing pyramid-thing with no windows, but I didn’t feel rested. That could have been from all my activity yesterday or from sleeping on a table though…

I felt bad disturbing Elsie’s slumber, but I needed answers, so I shook her awake.

“Wha… what is it?” She groaned, opening one eye to glare at me.

“Why did my head just talk to me and say I gained classes and skills? You never said that would happen!”

“Wait,” Elsie popped up, suddenly excited, “you have skills? And a class! No fair, I want them!”

“You want the babysitter class?”

“That’s a class?”

“Apparently. Anyways, please explain what is going on. I did not sign up for someone to mess with my head.”

“I don’t know, I’ve never gotten any! Carter and I can’t get them. Arantia says it’s because we aren’t part of the system, so I guess you are! Ooh I wonder if you’ll keep them when we go home? You could be super OP!”

“Okay… I guess that makes sense. I haven’t reacted to the world the same way as you in any other instances, so I suppose it is reasonable that this is the same. But why didn’t you tell me about the system?”

“Dunno. I didn’t think of it. It’s not important to me since I can’t get anything from it.”

“Does everyone in this world have classes and levels?”

“Probably. Again, I don’t know. Did you get any cool skills? Let’s test them out!”

“Uh…” I think back on the skills I had heard this morning, and suddenly a message popped into my head. It was both spoken by an androgynous voice and displayed in glowing text in front of me.

[Would you like to review your skills?]

“Sure,” I said aloud, looking at the screen. Elsie followed my eyes as they stared at what must have looked like empty space to her.

“Are you talking to yourself? That’s weird.” She stated.

“No, I’m talking to the system.”

“Woah, you can do that? I want to do that! Hey System! I’m Elsie! Nice to meet you!”

The system just ignored her and a list of skills popped into my eyes.

Classes: [Babysitter, lvl4] [Negotiator, lvl 2]

Skills: [Bandaging Owchies] [Finding Shelter] [Finding Food] [Basic Translation: Xamxa] [It’s for the Children]

Auras: [Calming Presence]

[click any skill for more details]

I clicked [Bandaging Ouchies], since it was the first skill on my list. I saw my hand touch where the screen was, but I felt nothing but air as my hand slid through. Nonetheless, the words changed.

[Bandaging Owchies: Skill, Tier 1. Conjures a band-aid that can be placed on any minor injury on people 12 or younger. Refresh time: 1 hour]

That was actually pretty convenient. “Give me your hand,” I said to Elsie, who was still attempting to commune with a system she could not see or hear. I tugged the band-aid off her finger; it was already loose due to time and Elsie’s fiddling with it.

“Bandage Ouchie!” I yelled. Elsie stared at me, first in awe, but it turned to ridicule when nothing happened.

[Would you like to activate the skill: Bandaging Owchies?]

“Yes,” I said, slightly embarrassed at having yelled my skill which resulted in nothing. This time however, red boxes began popping up everywhere.

[Error: User not found]

[Error: Foreign presence detected]

[Error: Unknown Error]

[Error: Unknown Error]

[Error: Unknown Error]

[Error: Entity unknown. Rerouting. Please stand by]

“Uh… I think I broke the system,” I said to Elsie, who was looking at me like a crazy person, supposedly because she couldn’t see the boxes. She spent five minutes attempting to talk to air and she thinks I'm the crazy one?

Finally, a blue screen appeared.

[Rerouted. Activating Skill.]

…aaaaand, a shit ton of band-aids were dumped on top of me from out of nowhere.