《The Adventures of Hood: Part 1 - The Book of Portals》Chapter 9: ‘The tragic demise of Barry Beerpots’
Advertisement
Hy-Jinx, snaps instantly out of her reverie, her eyes dotting the crowd to locate the heckler and upon doing so, stabs a finger pointedly towards them and exuberantly exclaims “Barry Beerpots it is!” - a devilish grin upon her face as if she’s secretly been wanting to sing this from the get go but needed permission…As if she’s deliberately bated them with a song so overly morose that it could not have not gotten this reaction. Without missing a beat she launches forth, the atmosphere instantly changing:
Barry Beerpots liked to drink
A small one every morn
Then follow it up with several sups
from his overflowing horn
Hey!
As Hy-Jinx begins to regale the inn with the one hundred and eight increasingly ruder and ruder verses of The Tragic Demise of Barry Beerpots, punctuated at various points by small dramatic asides to aid the narrative, Hood gathers his belongings and, shaking his head, makes his way barefoot through the boisterous crowd towards Millicent, to negotiate a room for the evening.
[Hood walking across the bar room, Hy-Jinx in the background]
By lunchtime he was feeling ill
By evening he was nasty
But he soaked it up and pulled around
By eating a Mencil pastie*.
[*a visual aside detailing the delights and size of the pasties of Mencil]
Hood holds up a single finger to communicate his needs - one single room, and only a single room, for he knows the old adage that a Jester’s place is by the fire, and judging by the reaction of the crowd there can be no argument with this wisdom.
He continued thus for six days hence
And never changed his britches
And so my friends it thus makes sense
As to why he got the itches
Millicent hands Hood a large iron key and motions to one of the servers to show Hood to his room, a surprisingly clean and spacious arrangement which promises a good night’s sleep.
And so he drank and itched and scratched
And itched and scratched some more
And the more he scratched the more he drank
To alleviate the sore.
Advertisement
- In Serial108 Chapters
Mother of Learning
Zorian is a teenage mage of humble birth and slightly above-average skill, attending his third year of education at Cyoria’s magical academy.He is a driven and irritable young man, consumed by a desire to ensure his own future and free himself of the influence of his family, whom he resents for favoring his brothers over him. Consequently, he has no time for pointless distractions or paying attention to other people’s problems.As it happens, time is something he is about to get plenty of. On the eve of the Cyoria’s annual summer festival, he is killed and brought back to the beginning of the month, just before he was about to take a train to Cyoria.Suddenly trapped in a time loop with no clear end or exit, Zorian will have to look both within and without to unravel the mystery before him. And he does have to unravel it, for the time loop hadn’t been made for his sake and dangers lurk everywhere…Repetition is the mother of learning, but Zorian will have to first make sure he survives to try again — in a world of magic, even a time traveler isn’t safe from those who wish him ill.
8 435 - In Serial44 Chapters
I'm a Kitsune?
Waking up as a starving infant was terrible, but finding out I'm a fuzzball was probably the highlight of my day.Fox ears and a tail? This is crazy, but at least I get to do nothing but relax in a crib for days and weeks at a time! There are just a few problems...
8 170 - In Serial12 Chapters
The popular kids
U moved to a new state which is California and u r from New York so u get to a new school with ur older brother Kobe
8 124 - In Serial13 Chapters
Living in my Own World!
Jacob was your ordinary successful game developer, being the developer of the most popular MMORPG out there. It had the best graphics, the best story, and more. But one day, he was sucked into his own world after being stabbed in the chest by a robber. He tests the waters and tries to use his admin panel to see if it worked, and it did! With this, he created a new body with no memories except those that were important to survival, with a little extra boost. In this world, the prodigy child Kas of the ex-noble family Ravenwood sets out to become the best adventurer! Author's Note: Please leave corrections or tips in the comments. I strive for 1,000 words at the very least. Also, this does not take place in a game, but the game's world, so there are no players, only the NPC's who have actual wills. Kas is basically God but he doesn't know it, and most likely will never have access to the admin panel because you need the password. Who knows though, he might get it one day with limitations!
8 165 - In Serial50 Chapters
Crimson
Akira Kurusu. Delinquent. Thief. Leader. Hero. Who is he? How many masks can one man wear?
8 204 - In Serial39 Chapters
Winter Solstice Mini Awards 2022 (Closed!)
Hello Everyone! As we all know, the holiday season is coming, and many traditions are being celebrated! However, some similarity is the celebration of Winter Solstice! This is why I welcome you to the Winter Solstice Mini Awards 2022! Which will be the last awards on the Philosopher Awards page for 2022! This award will be small, and writers with stories that have less than 5k reads will be allowed to sign up! I want more people's work to be noticed!Vampire/Werewolf slots are still open.
8 78

