《Of Misclicks and Magic》Sweating Bullets
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After the click of the door closing, I was petrified of what came next. The ornate office (or ornate as it could be for this little island) was decorated with countless paintings. Some very expensive looking vases were scattered about the tables around the room. The red rug was embroidered with a gold trim. But for such a dazzling room, I could only feel dread. I do not know what kind of connections he has on the mainland to import these luxurious items to this frontier. So much for the asceticism that the church so prides in. I guess it only applied to peons like me.
His gravelly voice spoke first to break the heavy silence, “I do not worry runt, I am not here to punish you.” So contrary to what I expected, the mask of calm on my face slipped off to show utter confusion without knowing it for a few seconds. I hurriedly reapplied my mask but it was too late, he saw it. I braved myself for a verbal assault only to be met with a neurotic laugh. “I said do not worry, runt, I like you. I am here to give you a deal, he would say before continuing. “Your idea to use holy water like a bomb was quite brilliant of you for your age. You have potential despite your weakness. You use your head unlike the bull-headed numbskulls known as your peers. I want to help you, the church needs more people who have functional brains.“
It sounded good on paper. Getting help from the head priest of the children’s wing would be a great boon. But I worry about his intentions and more importantly, the cost of this “favor.” He might be using me for his own purpose and unless I know for sure, it is best to reject. “I re—,” he put up his hand to motion me to cease talking. “I will say that this offer is something you should absolutely accept. It is a great opportunity for you.”
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Fuck. Realizing the meaning of his words, I internally throw a fit. This motherfucker! He was not giving me a choice in the first place!
“I… I humbly… accept your… offer.” It took all my will to hold back a stream of insults at this snapping turtle. I hate this! I never thought that he would take so much of an interest in me, the weakling of all the children, that he would trample my little free will afforded to me in this hell of an island. He only focuses on those he deems strong and “ideologically pure.” This is highly unusual for him. Why?
However, he was almost as bright as his room as I spat out those words. “Good choice, runt. Your work begins tomorrow by slaying a golem in the caves of our glorious island.”
A golem? A fucking golem? What the hell? I am not on that level yet! I do not have the firepower to inflict any damage that it would not just heal back! It heals though adding rocks to itself, something a cave has plenty of! You can kill it by hitting its core like a slime, but that is only if you can create an opening in its rock exoskeleton wherever the core might be… . All in all, a golem is a test of strength and endurance, which both I lack.
As if reading my mind, he would again speak, “I will give you a team for this. Come in Diego and Pucci.” With those words, a blond boy with sharp eyes and a lizard person (I am unsure of the gender, lizard people are hard to guess at). Were they waiting outside the whole time? That is a chilly thought. Diego wielded a halberd bigger than himself with a suit of armour that ill-fitted him. It truly amazes me that such a thing is possible, but I suppose it is a regular fantasy world after all. I could tell he disliked me by the disdainful look on his face. Pucci, however, I could not tell. If they hated, tolerated, or liked me, I did not know. Along with their spotless robes, Pucci had a bandolier of knives hanging on them. They probably specialized in knife throwing. The tips of countless blades had strange colors. Probably poison. Remind me to never piss him… her… whatever they are off.
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Great, more to deal with. Amaaaazing...
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