《the hero, the villain,and the profiteer》cha 18 the cute corpse
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[yami sitting].....i miss the internet.......and music....music room, but dungeon....so haven, good....goblin band...first song.....me and mister wolf..duet with a baphomet?..no...too early.... mad art singing angel of the stage?....closer..but not yet...a cover of ugly {nicole}..PERFECT!
[tink] what are you babling about?..you don'tmake sence to listento when you talk like that.
[yami] i want to listen to music while i read...and toentertain the troopes,and bring a little culture to them.[meanwile 2 goblins are drinking tea mixed with alcohol and eating biscuts while chatting]
....oh,i just thought of a new setting for the normal path...puppet theater, and music...i'll write up the plan later.
[tink] good, somthing i can relate to: art,i was worried you were just a grubby little spork-eater.
[yami].....(summons a insectivoruos bat, it lands on his outstreached finger, and gestures to tink)...eat.
[tink]OH SHI-(bat screach inturupts her)
[yami]what were you worried i was?
[tink] ....A-..an uncultured person.
[yami] better...stop(the bat stops chasing tink)
[tink].... you are way too sensitive!
[yami, petting the bat]....no,i just demand respect.....(looks blankly into space)just...respect...to be heard....(tink slaps him out of it)...thank you.
[tink]im getting tired of you being all...neurotic....be somthing else as well!(she says with a finger point,and ba of hand on hip)
[yami] well i need distraction allot, and our home isn't a "hotbed of exciting ocurences"...yet...so your suffering and the nightl fights are most of my entertainment.
[tink] so you DO do it on perpose!
[yami]..not all of them..the dolls dress upwas unexpected..sspeaking of which..dress up time!
[tink]OH NO,NOT AGAIN!
[yami].don't worry,.i set up todays outfit.
[tink].....and thats...good?
[yami].it not frilly today...just ..macabre.
[tink]....can i kill one after?
[yami] yes.
[tink]...bring it on.
(the dolls rush in and swar the landed tink, dressing her in a black childs dress over a white undershirt a long coller, gels her hair to hold groups of strands togeather hairclip it so it stays back, applied black eyeshadow, and gave her a tiny contactlens to make one of her eyes look milky white, and powdered hefaceto look paper white )
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[tink].*cof, koff*...i guess another refrence i don't get.
[yami]..yes....and it just made me think of the next floor planed...and since we got enough mana to do it since last week when i drew the plan up.
[tink] finaly,progress, i was begining to get bored of watching goblins explode afterf picking a fight with the mad arts.
[yami] TO THE PALANQUIN!
[tink] we can teleport.
[yami]...I DON'T CARE...i wanna ride it.....
[tink]...okay...just...weird.
(they go to a couch atached to 2 poles, after they get on 4 goblins pick it up and walk in unison)
[yami](stares at her).....[should i?]....ima gonna overwrite your mind again to make this more fun!
[tink]as long as you change me back aftarwards you f%^king man-child piece of s%# ^&*^%$%^ cornflakes %^&*&^%$%^&^%$%^&*-
[yami]alright,i will, bye{snaps fingers}
[tink]......[in a childs tone] oh,hello, there, your big and sickly looking, you want some soup?
[yami]...yes...this will do.
[tink] do what?
[yami].......never you mind.
[tink]...oka~~~y.....why are you wearing a bathrobe?
[yami] it's confortable.
[tink, peeks behind the robe] EEEW,your nakie!
[yami].heeey,...i have shorts on under it.
[tink] yeah, right....why is everything so big?
[yami] well, your a fairy,so-
[tink]REALY? WUUHOOOOOO[flys around yami's head] eedididididididi
[yami](is pretty happy for seeing the little freak happy of once)
[tink, seeing the bat].*GASP*..BIG KITTY!(hugs it's neck).mmmm, i love kitty,kittys soo special..(hugs tighter, snaping the bats neck)..(lets go).......kitty sleepy.(flys to the front windo)..ooh,what are those short green people?
[yami] goblins
[tink]...goblets?
[yami]..no,goblins.
[tink]...giblets?
[yami]...yeah.
[tink]........(thay pass the 1st floor boss)..oooooh, a flamin goat man with boobies!
[yami]*mq*..yes....that is a flamin goatman with boobies.
(the baphomet is not happy at being called that, especialy couse it was meditating)
[tink](knots atiny arrow) FOR THE HORD!(let it loose,going 5 in)....(throws it, and i hits it right in the tit)..yeah,..got it
[yami]halt,..i godda staple the map to the leads head.
[lead god] ?sboj tihs eht teg ew od yhw....
(he staples it to a head bourd strapped the lead gobs head)*chnk*..owwwww(the tip go's through it)
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[yami]MUSH!(cracks a whip)
(the gobs are going fasher to end this quicker, yami chooses a random dead end, due to some ants crawling into the box)
(he makes a huge room, sets up the border to look like a fence with rolling hills beyond, and makes the ground grassy)
[yami]...now,,,who wants zombies?!
[tink] oooh,..i do!
[yami] and a biiig house filled with art..mad art that is.
[tink] EFIN-A!
(a two story old looking building rises up from the ground in the center of the graveyard)
[yami] im gonna make them look like people's loved ones to them.(he makes a spawn point for zombies, and enchants both the headstones and the zombies to automaticly look like dead versions of whoever looks at its loved ones, with illusion
[tink](pokes one)..ooh, it's gooopy.(pokes more)
[yami]....hmmm,...maybe i should turn her back, it was funny, but it's dificult to consentrate on the task with her like that.{and hard to write}
(he returns her real memories)
[tink]...i can't say i liked that....but i didn't hate it.....(takes out her contact lense)....the zombie idea is a good one....maybe also have some of the art inside there also show the party's fallen too, you know..in scenes of enending agony?
[yami]...that idea was very atractive; got any more?
[tink] i guess you plan to have the entrance to the next one be in the building?
[yami] yes,..and your idea gave me another...but i can't do it...i don't have the magic..douse magic that can make reality generaly more maliable exist here?
[tink]...what IS your plan before i tell you.
[yami] paintings that suck tresspasers in...litteraly.
[tink]...yes a branch of magic that can do stuff like that exists, but for now,lets settle for the illusion paintings..the magic is high level and for the most part illegal by the gods...
[yami]....HEY, MANAGER,..IS THE SITUATION DIRE ENOUGH FOR MY USE OF IT TO BE ALLOWED?
[dg{dungeon god}]...well...not yet;... but...well,...i will add the start of the branch to your insentive...
PS..im actualy getting pretty excited by the prospect of my last bastion of existance being as secure as you seem to be making it....and no, you are not considered feared yet...1 kingdom fearing you is enough.[that will give my other dms enough time to hear and be inspired to rebel]...OH,...did that come out?!...ignore that last part, BYE!
[yami]...well, it seems he's regrowing his cojones the more i make...neat.
[tink]..please...don't talk about our god's "cojones".
[yami] yeah, i know you love them and can't stop thinkin bout them
[tink](angry blush face) yooooooooouuuuuu.......just do your job.
[yami]1rst floor had cave paintings, but here(opens door)will be figurative(creates mad arts reminicent of the works of francis bacon)..wait on those canvaces to strike intruders.(the art creatures slither onto the old looking canvaces)
[tink]..i don't know what you meant by figurative, but those are some scary paintings...perfectfor the ambiance of the floor..death,ghosts, undead,mourning, ..but what of the boss?
[yami](thinks).........................................................................................................................my mind has compiled a duo boss..lets seeifi can order the parts(checks the monster list)...hmmm,tweeking will be required, but theese 2 will do-....can i edit the bosses before i make them?
[tink]..wha-...oh......well, it's common to have a steady stream of dificulty,let me see what you are thinking of.(sees the 2 he is talking about,yami tells her the tweeks)....seems like it's doable
[yami] they also wander around.
[tink] that is more dificult..depends on how you set up the floor.
[ yami] the large area is 1 room, and this mansion isn't seperate, so i assume it's doable?
[tink] yes
[yami] okay(he creates a large rotting humanoid wearing a mask brandashing a large blade, and a tiny pale humanoid riding on his sholder wearing a dress, almost directing him)
[snap] howdy, im snap, but you can call me poppy, and this is monk
[monk](greating grunt)
[yami] yes,..you can play with whoever enters this place, that is your house(points to the mansion) and don't forget, you two are the boss here....on your property....this...this whole area.
[snap] oooh, it's soo pretty, (hugs monks head) don't you think monk?
[monk](afirmative grunt)
(yami and tink leave to put the finishing touches on the room)
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