《The Journey of a Lazy Magician》Chapter 4: A rude ray of hope
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Gentle in when touched. It permeates an exquisite taste just from looking at her.
From just the smell you can tell that she’s the sweetest thing known in existence that not even magic can imitate.
She is but a perfect existence and now I am staring at her. Is my unworthy eyes even allowed to view such an existence?
Although she allowed me to and I shall take that blessing to heart!
It took a stance that suggests that I take her. No, she wants me to take her. Coincidentally, our intentions matched like how the notes of a piano compliments each other as they’re played by a skilled hand. It wasn’t an exaggeration that we are meant to be.
But, before a happy ending could be had, I thief stole her away from me.
Such an evil creature…! I won’t let it get away!
“I found the muffin first! Give it to me!”
“No! I haven’t eaten in days. I need this to survive!”
“So do I!”
Currently. I am in the midst of an intense battle.
The very monster that took away my princess, I argued with the monster to give my precious muffin back.
But the monster was feisty. It wouldn’t yield.
Troublesome is all I can say but for me, who has a strong affinity with such creatures like this, will hopefully be able to take it down.
“Obviously you won’t give it to me without any sort of reason so how about this—“
Its ears perk up when it heard that I want to make a negotiation.
“You give me half of it and I will do whatever you want? Here, I’ll cut it for you.”
“…That meant anything, ye? Ho Ho~ very well!”
… Easier than I thought…
And like that, whilst wearing the face of a victor, it handed me the muffin which I gulped down in an instant.
Shocked at my sudden action, it tried to take it out of my mouth desperately but unfortunately for her, I closed my mouth shut and thoroughly chewed it. Actually, now that I tasted it, it taste like the dough was made of sewer residue.
…Ugh… I think I’ll have a diarrhoea after digesting this…
I feel like my face turned green too….
“Eh!? Don’t just eat it all! I’m really serious when I said that I still haven’t eaten anything! At this point, I might die in just a few days of being an adventurer in this world!”
Adventurer in this world? What is she, an alien or just someone who succumbed to the delusion of being an otherworldly creature summoned here?
Probably the latter because I’ve seen people actually having that kind of delusion. It’s very pitiful.
Moving the spoiled muffin I’m eating to the side of my mouth and spoke:
“Dewn, are youw wiwlling to eat thiws muwffin like a how a baby biwrd eawts the foowd its mother chewed fowr hewr?” (Then are you willing to eat this muffin like how a baby bird eats the food its mother chewed for her?)
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“Ew! Of course not!”
Thought so.
I pushed it down my throat and left a really bad taste in my mouth.
“Now monster, what’re you doing here?”
“…Monster?”
The monster tilted its head in confusion.
Ah, right. She’s actually a girl. I haven’t eaten anything recently so maybe I’m going crazy and started to obsess on something as petty as a common muffin,
This “girl” wore her black hair to freely flow but was tied at the ends with a rubber. Her eyes shone blue as the sea and her proportions is like that of a teenager, I hate to admit it but she’s taller than me. Her fair skin readily accepts the sunlight and made her look radiant.
As for her clothes, it’s like that of an archer. A light leather tunic with sheen guards and leather wrist guard. Of course, bow and arrow on her back.
Right. Obviously she’s an archer.
And obviously, she’s broke like me if she went as far as to resort to eating garbage.
The reason being… I’m curious also but asking a stranger something like that is rude.
“Don’t mind that. I’m Isaac. Yours?”
“Kyle. So you’re Isaac? The Isaac who’s everyone’s bad mouthing?”
“…No, I don’t know such person.”
“Hmm? Says in the adventurer’s stone, the infamous con man Isaac is someone who is smaller than your average adult, green eyes that looked like he didn’t sleep in weeks, and has a hair that looked like a pigeon’s nest. You seem to fit the description.”
My hair does not look like that! Are you kidding me!?
Who is this girl!?
“Truthfully, I’m searching for you.”
She said that and accompanied with heavy sigh.
“Me?”
“Yes, that’s right. I had hoped that I would find an experienced magician that would help me here and when the news regarding on your status came up, seeing that you look like the person I wanted to find, I immediately searched for your whereabouts. But to think that I’ve found you searching for food in the garbage… I think I’m having second thoughts.”
“H-hey, though I may be in this pathetic state but it only happened because of some unfortunate incidents!”
“Yeah. Incidents you’ve caused.”
Giggling after she retorted, this girl…! Who does she think she is?
“If you talk like that to me then I’ll just leave you right now. You said that you made the effort to find me so I can give you my help, right? For whatever reason that is and to why me in particular, I don’t really care but I do care of how other people talk to me and from your speech, I can see that you’re someone I’d rather not be acquainted with.”
Her face, whilst giggling stiffened like she was being petrified by medusa.
In a panicked voice, she tried to find her words with ‘Um…’ and ‘uh…’ sounds.
“I-I apologise, alright. I was just shocked that my already rock bottom expectations towards you could actually go even lower than that so…”
“Huh? Are you mocking me or something? I’ll have you know that I have mastered all of the basic spells in existence! I know of a lot of combinations to use them with too and mastered it to the point that I can generate a power that equals to that of an advanced spell.”
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“Eek! N-No I’m not! I highly see you as someone great so please don’t leave like that. I really need your help. I really do.”
She begged me like a dog asking to be removed from its leash.
Thinking about this situation I’m in, isn’t this a perfect chance to get a teammate? I don’t like her attitude but she can certainly be of use for me. Is this a ray of hope for my desperate state? With her, I can finally go to quests without me doing all the work!
I mean, I can do quest myself and with the reward, could get me something to eat that’s actually edible but hey, it’s more efficient for my energy this way. Plus, quest consumes a lot of mana and I’d like to preserve mine.
But I have to ask…
“Why do you want my help so badly?”
“It’s because I need you to do a certain task… Erm… I think it’s better if don’t tell you since it’s not that important right now. So for now, if you’re ok with it, I’d like to be in your party. Since I am an archer, I think I can do things you normally aren’t able to do. I can provide more varied and expansive options regarding on doing things.”
She puffed her lacking chest proudly.
Whatever that task she spoke of might be, I’d rather not do it so I’m hesitant on accepting her as a teammate even though I need someone to help me with my quests since it will be troublesome in the future. I just want to get rich as fast as possible without doing much effort and having some kind of side goal would just hinder my progress.
But still, I need someone. Anyone for that matter and have them do as I say.
After thinking it thoroughly, I sent her an invite which she was shocked for a moment when she heard it from the adventurer’s stone but shortly afterwards, accepted it without any hesitation.
“… I didn’t think that you’ll do it that quickly. So does that mean that we’re comrades now? Sorry, I’m not used to this.”
“Aye. That’s basically it.”
A twisted grin formed on my face.
“It says that what I’ve just accepted is a slave contract. Eh?”
Pfft! I can hold it in! I can’t believe this girl didn’t notice!
“Oi! What’s the meaning of this!?”
“HAHAHA! Think of this as a punishment for the badmouthing you did! I already had enough of how people treated me and the cold gazes they look at me at and now you came here and did the same. Kyle, is it? From now on, you’re my slave! Bounded by an absolute obedience towards me! I have something special in store for you… hehehe.”
Yes! Tremble and regret of how stupid you are! Something like a slave contract with a clearly obvious warning sign and you didn’t even noticed it and accepted it immediately like it was natural, you did this to yourself! Although, a slave contract between adventurers will only last for a month or if I cancelled the contract but of course, there’s no reason to tell her about it.
“…! What the!? What horrible things are you going t-to do to me!? Could it be that you’ll do ‘that’? I-I understand. You’re a male and they have these kinds of urge. Erm… I don’t think that my body had matured yet so… just wait for a few more years alright?”
Just then, I bopped her on the head.
As she rubbed her forehead with her hand, I told her this:
“Idiot. I will never get controlled by those urges. My mind is like steel. It will not yield to my instinct to copulate. What do you think I am? A pervert? If I were to be, then I wouldn’t have been able to learn so much magic spells like I did and continue to get distracted by girl’s pantsu plus, I have a very distinct taste towards girls. See my hat? It’s dark. It’s the mark of an experienced magician.”
Kyle, still rubbing her head, looked at me with a playful smile.
“…Yeah, experienced in only basic spells…”
She whispered but I couldn’t quite hear it.
“What was that?”
“I-It’s nothing! Of course you aren’t. Actually, now that my expectations of you are so low and view you now as someone pathetic, I expected you to be that sort of guy who would lay a hand on any girl he sees and if the opportunity arises, he would, without any hesitation, do ‘that’. I was just testing you of course.”
She was testing me, but her trembling body isn’t convincing at all.
So now I got this girl in my party. Truth be told, even though I’d like anyone to join me, I am very wary about her. I mean, she’s too blunt! It hurts my ego…
Well, I just have to deal with her for now. Also, I’ll try to resist the best I can to punch her whenever she opens her mouth.
And so then and there I found someone willing to join me. With her name Kyle and being an archer, I think I can come up with something to make her useful.
“Alright, I’m starving. Kyle is it? We’ll go on a quest. A simple one and evaluate your skills there.”
“Oh ok. Then after, I presume that after that, we’ll eat something so we won’t die of starvation?”
“Aye.”
“What are you? A pirate?”
“Shut up or I’ll order you to eat dog poop.”
“…sorry.”
For some reason, I have a bad feeling about this…
And so does my fist. It really wants to hit her in the face.
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