Demon

Chief returned the next day, I had no idea where he had been but Rip wasn't with him and I had no idea what had happened or why he looked like he had bad news for me. I met him in the yard in front of the garage, "What happened? Where is she?" I asked.

"She's gone Demon, she doesn't want you to try and find her."

"No, fuck that, Chief. Where the fuck is she? If she thinks she can just run out on me and take my kid with her, the bitch is fucking wrong!" I raged, she can't leave me and take my kid away. It's not happening, I would find her eventually.

"She told me to tell you she miscarried, the baby didn't make it through the accident, Demon. She lost the baby the day before she was discharged, you would have known that if you had of bothered to visit her. Don't go looking for my fucking niece, Demon, she deserves better than a fuck up like you." He spat then stormed away.

She left me? And the baby was gone? I had so many questions that needed to be answered, I needed to find her fuck what chief said. She's my old lady and she belonged here with me even if there was no baby anymore.

~$~

It had been weeks since Rip left and I still had no idea where she was. The men that went with Chief to drop her off at this unknown location, they wouldn't tell me shit. I tried everything, bribery, threats, hell I even tried kicking them out of the MC, Chief put a stop to that though and almost put a bullet in me. Where was she?

I'm not giving up on her, she's mine.

~$~

Rip

It has been three months since I left Thorn, the first few days were rough for me. I didn't know anyone and I hated getting to know new people, the charter president had two kids around my age and they took me under their wing. Logan was 21 with the rugged good looks of a biker, he was a man whore like most young bikers. His sister, Loretta was 19 and not your typical biker chick, she would rock the leather and lace at the parties but she was a sweats and hoodie type of girl. They were the people that took me in when I arrived, their father, Priest, was amazing, anything I needed he was there.

By this time, I was five months pregnant, Logan and Loretta were supportive and came to all the scans and doctors' appointments. Everyone who didn't know the situation assumed Logan was the father, neither of us corrected them. It didn't affect Logan's sex life at all, he still managed to screw anything with legs.

I still hadn't decided if I was going to keep the baby or adopt the kid out. I would have to go back to Thorn eventually, the question was, did I go back as a mother or keep the story of the miscarriage and go back as the girl who lost her child. Either way there would be questions and I had a few more months to decide.

~$~

Demon

Six months, it had been six months since she left. I gave up looking for her about three months back, Chief put pressure on me to give it up. Shit went downhill when she left, I started drinking and fucked everything with legs. After a couple weeks of that, I started looking for her again but I didn't get anywhere. She was gone and I had to accept that, so Chief said. She would come back in her own time.

I had thrown myself into work at the garage and club business. I tried not to think about Rip and the baby and what could have been. She would be due right about now, I tried not to think about everything we would have missed, the family we missed out on. We wouldn't get to see our kid grow up, I wouldn't get to run the boys off that would try get into my daughter, I wouldn't get to have a beer with my son on his 16th birthday.

I couldn't think about all of that though, when I did, I would sit at the bar for days drowning in two or three bottles of whiskey before taking a couple of the whores to bed for a couple days. I needed to forget somehow, I needed to forget that I wasn't there when she needed me, that I wasn't there when she lost our baby.

I needed to forget her.

~$~

Rip

I was massive, I was the size of a fucking house and I could only waddle around at a snail's pace. I hated this part of pregnancy, I couldn't sleep, I could barely fit through the fucking door. I was grumpy and irritated with everything and the damn kid had stayed in there for an extra two fucking weeks. I was overdue and snapping at everyone, even Logan and Loretta had coped it.

I had an appointment with the midwife tomorrow to get induced, thank fuck, pregnancy was so overrated. I had finally decided what to do with the baby, I had found a nice couple to raise her and give her the kind of life I wouldn't be able to. They weren't a part of the life, they are as straight as you could get, I knew that because I had Hacker, the resident computer whiz, do a full and thorough search on them. I could tell you the name of his 1st grade imaginary friend if I wanted to. My child would have the life I would never be able to give her and the safety I would never be able to guarantee.

The day came to end slowly and after a sleepless night, my slow-moving body finally made it out of the house and the hospital, where I was met by Sam and John Wilson, the soon to be parents. After signing some papers and getting all sorted in the room I was induced. Things moved pretty quickly from there, one minute I was having light contractions, the next there was a small child forcing its way out. She cried and was handed straight to her new mum, I didn't want to hold her, I knew if I did I wouldn't want to give her away.

This way was better for her, better for both of us, everything sort of got fuzzy and faded to black after that.

~$~

Logan

I was there when she went into the room to be induced, I was there as the pain crossed her face while she gave birth to a strong baby girl, and I was there as she watched the nurse hand her child to her new mother. That was exactly what she wanted, she had told me her reasons behind not wanting to hold the baby and gain a connection. It would be a closed adoption for now, until she turned 18.

I was also there when Rip started to fade out, when her eyes became unfocused and she passed out. The nurses pushed us all out and the doctor called in for an operating room to be made ready immediately. I wouldn't have been told anything if they knew I wasn't the kids' dad, if they knew that I was just her friend.

"Whats happening?" I asked the nurse as they were rushing Rip onto an elevator.

"She's losing too much blood, we have to get her to surgery now." She was rushed but I wouldn't move, I needed more information. She shoved me out of the way and ran onto the elevator before I could press her for more.

I went and sat in the waiting room and called dad, he answered on the third ring. "Yeah, Logan everything go ok?"

"She's been taken to surgery, losing too much blood, they wouldn't tell me anything more than that."

"And the baby?"

"Yeah, the baby is fine, a healthy baby girl. Sam was holding her when shit went south."

"I'll call Chief and your mum and sister, we will be there soon, son."

It wasn't long before they were all in the waiting room with me, harassing the staff for information. Hours went by and we still hadn't heard anything, Chief and a couple of the Thorn charter rolled in, still nothing, she had been in there for hours.

"How much longer is this going to take!? She has been in there for fucking hours!" I yelled, at no one.

"Calm down, son, they will tell us when they know something." Dad said.

I was pacing the waiting room when the doctor came out. "Riley Burrows Family?"

Chief stood, "I'm her father."

"Miss Burrows had a tear in her uterine wall, it was causing internal bleeding. She lost a lot of blood and she then had respiratory issues and went into cardiac arrest." The doctor took a breath, just as I was about to tear his head off, he said, "We brought her back, she'll be in recovery for a few hours. One f the nurses will let you know when she is settled in her room."

There was a collective sigh of relief throughout the waiting room at the news.

"You should go home, Logan. Get some rest, I'll let you know if anything happens. Chief said, slapping me on the shoulder.

"Nah, I'll stay here. I want to be here when she wakes up." I said.

The waiting room soon emptied, leaving just me and Chief. We sat in silence, just waiting for the nurse to let us in to see Rip. She made it through surgery, she would be fine.