There's nothing worse than coming to the rink before school. I need to pick up my skates, I dropped them off to get the blades sharpened but they were so backed up it took almost a week to get them back. I wouldn't be wasting any time doing it either, my back-up skates weren't as nice.

Today is Thursday, the week has been boring to say the least. Sabrina's threats of dumping me for not telling her I loved her had of course turned out to be false. She was clinging on to me now more than ever and I wanted her to give me a bit of space.

I'd turned sixteen two days ago and mom and dad gave me my first car. I was so happy, I wouldn't have to take the bus to practices now. 

I hadn't heard anything back from Sasha or her brothers, I know I didn't deserve to either. Why would she tell me anything? I wished I could tell her in person but I seriously doubted her brothers even passed on the message. I'd been lumped in with Jake and his nonstop teasing and none of them saw me as anything other than an enemy.

I walk to the counter to wait for my skates, it's been a long time since I've been here this early. Then I can hear the distinctive sound of sad classical music coming from the rink. I furrow my eyebrows, taking my skates and walk to the edge of the seating around the rink.

"Again Sasha, you're not placing your arms properly!" I see Sasha's dad standing around the boards with his arms crossed. I think he's actually gotten much scarier than the last time I saw him. He yells something else out in Russian and I watch the vein in this forehead almost explode out of his skin.

Sasha spins beautifully, looks focused but the beauty of the spin is cut short by her dad telling her to stop.

"I've had it Sasha! I'm done I can't do this anymore when you refuse to listen!" He yells and she shrinks back. "You find another way to school this morning, you'll be lucky if I pick you up from your practice tomorrow night!" He storms up the steps out of the rink, towards me and I duck behind a wall watching him leave the rink and drive away.

When did Andrei become like this? I knew he always pushed her and worked her but I didn't know it was this bad. I come out and look back at a lonely Sasha leaning her face against the glass surrounding the rink.

She stands up a second later and skates over to the music hook up. She pauses the cold classical music and looks for a second before finding something else. Out of nowhere, loud, upbeat music comes from the speakers and Sasha starts skating around.

I watch her use the space around the rink with fun steps and spins. She skates....differently than she just did. It looks like she belongs out there instead of like she's being forced to repeat steps. I watch her skate over and pull something out of her hair, seconds later it's falling around her shoulders. She shakes it out and unzips the sweater she's got on.

I can see her arms and back and how strong they are. She moves around the ice with a smile as she does a few simple tricks and really throws herself into it.

I haven't seen her like that in years, I don't even know the last time I saw her smile like that. I don't know the last time it looked like she was having fun on the ice. But when she skates like this it feels like her, she's got all the same precision and elegance that she normally does but she looks approachable, confident.

I slowly walk down the stairs, getting closer to her I watch as she does one small jump and lands it with a smile. Her blonde hair whips around her as she skates, flowing in the small breeze created by her skating.

Then the music ends and she stops quickly in the middle of the rink taking a few deep breaths. She smiles and runs her hands over her face before going back to turn off the music.

I smile and give her a small round of applause and she whips her head back to see me standing there. She looks horrified, upset I walk over to the door to the rink and lean over the boards.

"That was good." I tell her and she smirks. She doesn't answer just starts trying to put her hair back up. "Why don't you skate like that all the time?" She huffs and looks for her pins to put her hair back up but they've disappeared. 

She doesn't even acknowledge I'm speaking and it hurts to say the least. I the pins on the other side of the boards and pick them up passing them over. She swipes them out of my hands and starts pinning her gorgeous hair back again.

"Come on Sash, that was great-"

"Why are you here right now!" She says angrily. "Come to make fun of me some more?"

"What?" I ask feeling shocked. "I did think it was great, amazing even." She narrows her eyes at me as if I'm insulting her.

"Whatever Nathan, please go." She huffs and skates away from me. I hate watching her want me to leave her so badly. I sit down and lace up my own skates before stepping out on the ice after her. She looks back at me and looks even more angry.

"I-I didn't know you practiced in the mornings." I say cautiously.

"Well I obviously do don't I?" She snaps back. "What are you doing here?"

"I had to pick up my skates I left them to get sharpened." I say and she nods. "I-um.....I saw the thing with your dad." She laughs a bit and just shakes her head.

"Yeah you've seen how glamorous my life really is. You're not the only one who doesn't leave me alone and makes it unbearable."

"I make your life unbearable?" I ask and she nods skating a little further away.

"Yeah, so here's the scoop are you ready?" She asks harshly and I feel my heart break hearing her so angry with me. "The ice queen got second at a little local competition last week. That's the first time I've been second in ages. Happy? Go tell your teammates and girlfriend." 

"Why would I tell anyone that?" I ask and she rolls her eyes.

"Because this is the closest thing you and I have had to a conversation in years. You don't treat me with any more respect than Sabrina or Jake do." I sigh.

"I do. I don't pick on you the harsh way everyone else does." I tell her and she laughs again.

"Well thank you so much for the prestigious honour!" She says sarcastically.

"I only tease you, the way I used to when we were young." I say and she looks disgusted by that.

"Well we're not young anymore are we?" She says pointedly. 

"Sash." I say quietly and she seems almost taken aback. She looks for the first time in four years, vulnerable.

"What do you want?" She asks quietly. 

"I just wanted to talk, I....I haven't really had the chance in a while." I say and she frowns. "I miss-"

"Don't." She says waving her hands around. "What's done is done, you have your crowd now. I don't." I can hear how sad she is.

"What happened at the competition?" I ask. "You never lose."

"I'm getting older, I know the technique is really important but....I'm getting hurt artistically." She admits. "I shouldn't be telling you this." She says a second later and shakes her head.

"Why not?" I ask and she furrows her eyebrows. "I'm not going to tell anyone."

"Nathan, we haven't spoken in four years. You can't just come waltzing back into my life again like everything's fine and nothing has changed." 

She was the only person in the entire world that called me 'Nathan'. It was small but it still felt special, it felt like she might care somewhere behind her icy glares.

"But we used to-"

"What's with the sudden interest?" She asks and I smile.

"It's not sudden." I tell her shaking my head. "I just....I got a little caught up. This is the first opportunity I've had in a while."

"Well this ship might have sailed." She says. "Too much time has passed."

"We're kids Sasha, we're young." I say and she rolls her eyes.

"I'm glad one of us is." She says crossing her arms.

"What do you mean by that?" I ask feeling mildly insulted.

"One of us has more friends than we can count. Goes out, has fun and has a girlfriend." She says quietly. "The other one is married to this rink, doesn't stop doing anything and everything for skating and is looking to be on the women's team in the next Olympics." 

I suddenly understand it's not a dig at me being immature, it's her telling me she's growing up too fast.

"Well it's not all sunshine and rainbows." I tell her. "Sabrina's a lot."

"Yeah she seems like a lot." She says with a small laugh.

"She's complicated." I admit. "Look, I told your brothers to tell you good luck at your competition. I don't know if they did but-"

"Surprisingly they did." She says with a shrug. "Didn't seem to help but, thank you."

"Look....Sash is there any way you could see us hanging out again?" I ask and she looks caught off-guard. 

"I don't think so." She says quietly. "It wouldn't work."

"Why not? We're doing it now." I tell her and she sighs. 

"Because every single day I practice for three hours, go to ballet for two, go to school, go to the gym a few times a week, go to physio appointments and spend my weekends working on routines." She says shaking her head. "If that wasn't enough of a reason, try the fact that your crowd despises me, your girlfriend would hire a trained assassin to take me out, my dad won't even let me have friends and even if I could, you're the last person I'd be allowed to talk to."

"Your dad still doesn't like me huh?" I ask.

He used to say that I was a distraction for Sasha, that I was holding her back. I was twelve at the time and so was she. 

"Nathan we're in different worlds, on different paths. There's no chance this would work, it would just get you and me into a lot of trouble that we don't need to be in."

"Fine." I say feeling mildly disappointed. "Yeah I get it."

"I'll give you a call if I make the Olympics. Then maybe we could go see a movie." She says trying to lighten the mood.

"I'll keep you to that." I tell her and she nods. "Look I promise I'll stop picking at you alright?"

"That would be nice." She says. "I get enough of it from my dad."

I never even thought about the fact that that her dad is making her life hard enough and everyone I know is just making it worse.

"Look I need to get changed if I want to catch the bus to school." She says skating back towards the door to the rink. "But um.....nice talking to you."

"Do you want a ride?" I ask and she laughs.

"You don't want to drop me off." She says shaking her head. "Everyone is just going to give you a hard time."

"I don't care, I could always drop you off down the block." I tease and she rolls her eyes. "Come on it's the least I can do for interrupting your practice."

"Fine." She says and steps off the ice making her way to the change room. There really wasn't anything that looked better on her than one of those little skating leotards. It was brief but I just saw a tiny glimpse of the old Sasha, the one who loved having fun. 

It made me miss her, I never should have left her. She's still upset with me and I can see she's intentionally keeping me at arm's length. I hope this isn't the last time we get to see each other.

"Ready?" I hear and see Sasha coming up behind me with her bag. She's dressed how she always is, loose sweater, loose jeans, hair in a tight knot at the back of her head and a pair of beat up sneakers.

I knew the real reason Sabrina wanted me to be mean to her was because even when she dressed like that, she was still drop dead gorgeous. 

"Yeah, I'm good if you are." I say and she nods following me out.

"It was your birthday two days ago wasn't it?" She asks and I nod. I can't believe she knew. 

"This was my present." I say bringing her to my car and she pretends to be impressed. "You drive yet?" I ask and she shakes her head. 

"No, I....haven't learned yet." She says. "No time."

"Right, sorry." I say and she shrugs. "Let's go."