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I bang three times on the door clenching my fists trying to keep myself together. 

A shirtless Luke answers the door and takes one look at me and sighs. "Again?" 

I walk pas him into his house. "Yeah. Again." I grab the bottle of Vodka from his fridge and rip off the top chugging it back hearing Luke sigh behind me. 

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I wake up rubbing my eyes and sigh. It's Sunday, which means it's the last day here with Bain and Isabella. 

Bain. 

I sigh and run my fingers through my hair. I'm going crazy. How can he do this to me? Make me feel so many things at once. I mean especially since everything he's put me through? How can I like him? 

Ryan snores next to me and I nudge her said sniffling feeling tears burn the back of my eyes. "Ryan?" 

She turns over and rubs her eyes squinting at me. "Oh my gosh are you okay?" 

I shake my head and decide to let it all out. Release the tears of confusion and sadness and anger. 

Why was I angry? 

Because this boy this bad boy found his way to my caged heart. He broke me. He changed me. Just look of all the things I've done and places I've been since I've met Bain. He kissed me and touched me in ways no one else has and open things inside of me no one else could have. Then he stopped to be with someone else. Then he gets angry and jealous when another guy shows interest in me? Then he makes these all night disappearances. 

What if he spent the night with another girl just to get back at me? 

But why should I care? What is he to me then just a friend? 

He's someone you're falling in love with.... 

NO I can't I refuse to let myself fall for such a... a... "Beautiful monster." I sigh and Ryan furrows her eyebrows rubbing my back. 

I tell Ryan everything from the hot shower moment to the soft gentle caresses, to the mean words and lashing out to the clearness of his eyes opening up to me about his mother. 

"He's a roller coaster that can't - won't be stopped, Ry." I say and shake my head sighing wiping my tear stained cheeks. "All these ups and downs are so extreme it's so hard keeping up with him." 

Ryan shakes her head and sighs. "I don't know what to say, honey. But I know that If i were you I would do two things." 

"What's that?" 

Ryan gets up and grabs my phone then sits back down and places it in my hand. "You need to tell Ben that now just isn't a good time for you to be dating." I sigh and look down at my phone. 

She's right... 

"And two?" 

"Two you have to admit to yourself that your falling in love with Bain. I know you hate it, but hun there's nothing you can do. You want him and your just going to have to live with it." 

I take a deep breathe and I take a moment to really really listen to myself this time. To not deny what I feel and hear myself tell me what I really want. 

When I open my eyes there's tears spilling out of them because I know exactly what I feel. 

"I'm falling in love with Bain White." 

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"This is good." I say and Isabella smiles. She wanted to make me lunch, Macaroni and Cheese, and prove that she's just as good in the kitchen as I am. And she was right, maybe even better. 

I take another bite of the deliciously cheesy macaroni with bacon and sigh. This is exactly what I needed. Ryan left earlier and I told her thank you for all of her help. She wished me good luck and to feel better and that she would see me at school Monday. Just a little after Isabella woke up and told me all about her date with my brother. Apparently that had so much and common and she couldn't stop blushing the whole night. He had said she was cute and even put his arm around her. Young love is adorable. I had congratulated her and ever since she hasn't stopped smiling. 

"Thank you," Isabella says now and sits in the chair across from me. We continue to eat in comfortable silence. 

"So you and I are going to go to the store. I wanted to grocery shop and stuff before I left tomorrow." Isabella nods and suddenly the door bell rings. 

"I got it," Isabella says and goes through the door and into the living room answering the door. 

A deep male voice sounds through the house, "Hey little belly what's up?" 

At first I froze but my heart remained steady. It's not him... 

I get up and go into the living room seeing a tall, dark brown almost black haired guy with a black t-shirt and cargo shorts come into the house. Isabella smiles big and hugs him. 

"Luke!" She says in excitement and he laughs. 

'Luke' smiles and finally notices me and Isabella follows his line of sight. "Oh! You havent met yet, Luke this is Bain's friend Isabella. Well she's my friend too now." She beams and I smile at her sweetness. 

"I'm Ash." I say and he nods. 

"I'm Luke." He answers and I nod. 

"So what are you here for?" Isabella asks and Luke replies, "I came to drop of your brothers truck. He slept over at my house yesterday and is still knocked out on my couch so I thought I'd bring it over in case you needed it." 

Bain slept at his house last night and not with another girl? My heart raced and wondered why he didn't just come home last night? 

"Yeah! Ash was just saying how we were going to grocery shop for a few things before she has to leave tomorrow. Wanna come?" 

"Sure," Luke smiles and Isabella jumps excitedly and runs off to her room to change and grab her things to go. 

Luke clears his throat awkwardly and I cross my arms. 

"So... how do you know Bain?" I ask and Luke looks at me in surprise. 

"Oh uh, we've been friends for a long time. Since he was little actually, I only live a couple streets down." 

I nod and swallow having a million more questions to ask, but decide that now isn't the time. 

"Is... is he okay?" I add and Luke nods. 

"Oh yeah he's- he's fine." 

I nod and look down. 

Luke sighs and looks to the ceiling mumbling something like, "Stay out of it, Luke just stay out." I lift my eyebrows and he sighs again and looks at me. 

"Look, I know who you are." Luke says and rubs the back of my neck. "He talks about you. A lot actually." 

My eyes widen slightly and my lips part. "I, god dammit, I know I should stay out of it and he might kill me, but there are somethings that you should know." 

I gulp and nod not capable of moving, breathing, much less making a noise. 

"Bain he- uh he's not very easy to talk to alright. He has been through a lot in life, with his mom gone and his dad leaving to become some asshole billionaire-" what?!, " He's not so easy at opening up. Alright so all i'm going to tell you is that Lauren? She's one of Bain's married with kids neighbor that used to live next door that used to baby sit Isabella and help Bain with food and stuff was coming to town to see how they were doing, not a booty call." 

Oh my god. 

I can't breathe. 

"I just had to tell you because I know he was to pus- er coward to tell you." 

I shake my head in shock not knowing what to say. 

"And just so you know he hasn't been with any girl since he's met you. I know because i'm his friend he'd tell me. When he's not here with you or Isabella he's with me." 

"Where is he?" I breathe and Luke licks his lips looking down the hall to make sure Isabella isn't coming down the hall. 

"He's passed out drunk. He likes to drink his emotions and problems away." Luke says and I sigh and sit on the couch. 

This is all my fault. How could I have thought so badly of him? Why did't I just give him a chance to explain or-or tell me the truth? How could I go to judge him so quickly? 

"He's not a coward." I say and Luke raises his eyebrows. 

"He tried to tell me," I shake my head, "But I wouldn't listen." 

Luke sighs and scratches behind his neck. "I'm not getting myself deeper into this than what I already have. Now this is between you and him." 

Isabella walks out with a smile. "I'm ready." She says and I think yeah. 

So am I. 

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