When I got to Noah's apartment, he opened the door and smiled at me. I remember how angry I felt when he spoke.

"Oh hey, Ava, I knew you'd come around eventually to apologize." Noah chuckled as he let me in.

I went in and took a deep breath to calm myself.

"You know what? You're right, Noah. I came to apologize. I came to apologize because I feel like I messed up. I should've been more careful. This shouldn't have progressed this far. I can't be intimate with someone who can't wait or at least be considerate of my feelings and my anxiety towards that particular stuff." I said to him, sighing and handing him the box full of his stuff.

"Ava... are you actually serious right now?!" He yelled at me.

"Noah... be honest. Do you really love me?" I asked him.

"No! I don't! I don't love you, Ava. What's there to love, anyway?!" He yelled, throwing the box of his stuff aside. "You don't let me sleep with you, hell you don't even let me touch you! We're not children, Ava. Sex is normal for couples like us!"

"No. It isn't... you know what... it doesn't matter, Noah. It's over, right?" I asked him.

"It absolutely is, I just can't believe I wasted almost an entire year on you! Worthless little Ava. You thought you could be my wife? You can't even cook, you will never be a doctor like you want to be, because you're too damn weak and emotionally unstable. You think you're beautiful too, don't you?! But all you are is average. You have nothing going for you. All I wanted was a good time, and I guess that was too much to ask, because even you don't know when to let loose. I mean seriously, Ava, did you really think I'd ever actually want you to be my girl forever?!" He yelled angrily.

Part of me felt like he might just be saying things he doesn't mean. But he said them and that's all that mattered. It hurt to hear him say those things. I knew I wasn't the prettiest or the smartest, I knew I didn't have much to offer. I told him that before we started the relationship and he was the one who told me that it didn't matter.

"Oh and for the record, I got what I wanted anyway. Don't think you prevented me from anything. I've still slept with several girls since you wouldn't let me near you." Noah added, just toughening the blow and the humiliation.

"Well then I'm glad I didn't give you what you wanted from me, Noah. Because you definitely weren't worth this year." I told him.

I just remember smiling at him with an ache in my heart and waving goodbye. I walked out of that apartment and out of his life. And somehow, it felt like life was back to normal. It felt like there was just a large rock over my shoulders the entire time and it was lifted now.

I went home immediately and at that point my father was there. I told them about the breakup, how he cheated on me and yelled horrible things at me. They looked horrified that they'd let a guy like him near me. But of course, they were supportive as ever, offering me whatever it was I wanted to help me get through my first breakup.

I asked for some time alone, and I went to my room. I told myself to cry, told myself this was the one and only time I could allow myself to cry over that horrible jerk. And I realized after five minutes in my room, but I didn't feel sad, I didn't feel the need to cry. I was ok. I wasn't hurt by this breakup, only by the words he told me, the words that fed into my already existing insecurities.

I just decided that I should go spend some time with my best friend instead of trying to make myself mope around. When I drove over there, I found Jordi in her room. She looked lost in thought, and then she saw me and smiled. I sat down and when she asked me how I was, I told her what happened. Only for her to freak out as well.

The last thing I expected was for my best friend to turn on me. But that's what happened. She told me how stupid I was to leave such a man. And just like Noah had told me how useless and worthless I was, so did Jordi. I still remember her words.

"You have nothing going for you, Ava. You think you're smart and beautiful and likeable, when all you are is average. No one really even sees you, you're flat as a board and you're not even that smart. Just go back to him before you end up spending your entire life alone."

Hearing those words from the girl I spent my entire childhood and teenage years with was like a stab in the chest. She was my best friend and that's how she saw me. But somehow, I was able to push through. All my other friends also turned on me, calling me childish and stupid because I didn't just let Noah have what he wanted.

I still got through the rest of that year, shutting everyone and everything out and trying my hardest to get a perfect GPA so that I could get accepted to the universities that I'd applied to internationally.

I got an interview for the school in Vancouver, the one in Toronto, the one in London and the one in Cambridge. I attended online interviews for the ones in Europe and the ones in Canada, I visited with my dad for the interviews.

My parents were very supportive. They knew what had happened, but they didn't know the details about Jordi and my other friends. They told me I could do whatever I wanted and that I was mature enough to make the correct decision for myself. So, I decided I needed distance. If I got into the universities that I'd applied to outside of the country, I would go to one. I just needed to get out of Canton.

And luckily for me, I got a flawless GPA and I got accepted into all four of those universities. I decided Vancouver was the way to go. It was so pretty up there and it wasn't in a different continent, not to mention it had the best program. In only six years, I'd be a doctor.

So, off I went, packing my bags, saying goodbye to Canton and my parents and then going to Vancouver. I had an apartment waiting for me and my parents were kind enough to pay for my expenses until I settled down. Then I began paying my own rent and for my own food and stuff and all my parents did was pay my tuition, which I was paying back as soon as I possibly could.

Here I am, six years later, getting ready for my first day of my residency at Vancouver General Hospital. I had finally made it. I had achieved all the things those jerks told me I'd never achieve. The only exception was that I had yet to find a man.

Lots of men asked me out, but it all felt fake and I knew they weren't looking for serious relationships, so I shut them down. Now that I'd finished all my studies and I was officially Dr. Ava Dara, I was going to find myself a man. I felt like I'd reached a happy independent point in my life and I was ready for a relationship. At least that's what I thought, but it was harder than that.

It turned out that working at a hospital was very different from the medical school practicals. I was by no means an emergency doctor, nor did I want to be. I was happy with calm and peaceful internal medicine.

I heard the Attending Physician overseeing my work was one of the best. His name was Dr. Federico Ferrari and he seemed very nice based on the few messages we'd exchanged. I just hoped he wasn't as mean as the Attending that I was assigned to during medical school. I knew Vancouver General like the back of my hand, it was more of a home to me than my apartment. And I was excited to finally live my dream. After all that hardship, all those insecurities, all the insults and belittling friends, I felt empowered. Nothing was standing in my way anymore. I was who I wanted to be.

Those things were all in the past now, and I knew I didn't have to think about them. So, I pulled myself out of my flashbacks, and I finished brushing my teeth. I washed my face, tied my hair up in a ponytail, and off I was, ready for my first day of real work.

I just never expected that it would be so difficult. I thought internal medicine was the easy field. I felt like I was in a emergency room though. I got there and I immediately had twelve patients to see. I changed into my scrubs, put my white coat on and off I was. I realized how much I had to rely on the nurses. I couldn't do everything myself. I was too busy for that. I basically went in, examined the patients, and if it was something like an injection, I just had the nurses do it. Some people came in for somewhat pointless reasons, but I admired their caution when it came to their health.

Some of them were worried patients whose kids had gotten large cuts on their arms or legs. A simple band-aid was enough for them and off they went with their little stickers.

After about twenty patients, I felt like I needed a year off. I knew the feeling would fade, but I just felt so exhausted already. My brain was working in overdrive. I looked over so many files, so many x-rays, MRIs, ultrasounds, and blood test results. I diagnosed what felt like seven million patients and I dealt with a bunch of screeching toddlers. Luckily lots of those screeching toddlers were an easy fix.

I really do love children, but after running around all day and getting yourself a major headache and aching feet, you don't appreciate the screeching. Once I finally got a five minute break, my day just had to be sugarcoated with some first day action. Every member of staff was called to the emergency room because of a huge collision. The patients just kept rolling in and the emergency staff weren't enough to handle it. They needed every hand they could get.

I just followed my attending down to the emergency room and tried to listen carefully as he told me I'd done well, and that he'd try to assign me very simple tasks since this was my first day as a doctor in the emergency room. For heaven's sake it was my first day as a doctor, period. I just hoped I wouldn't have to assist in any surgeries or something.

Luckily for me though, my first job was very simple. Stitches. Emergency room or not, that couldn't be hard at all, right?