The party was located at the top floor of the building, and it was already packed when I got up there. I had never imagined that this many people worked here, but guessed it had to do with the fact that I never actually bothered to socialize with anybody at the least. The ceiling was filled with paper garlands and at the far end of the room was a small stage. Would there be performances too? That I didn't look forward to. Booths with tables and chairs were placed at the sides of the room and people were cramming the bar to get drinks. The sign said open bar, an ominous sign to me.

I looked around the room for Ash but couldn't find him anywhere, so I got to the bar and ordered a beer and headed to the only other person in the room I knew, Chris. He sat in one of the booths with I guy I vaguely recognized as a co-worker. They looked like they already had some drinks and Chris was gesturing enthusiastically as he talked to the guy. When I arrived at their table, he went dead silent and stared at me.

"Jack?" he said amazed, his jaw hanging open. "You... I didn't fucking recognize you. Had no idea you had this much ink, man! Didn't think you liked company parties?"

I sat down across from them with my beer and shrugged.

"Guess I wanted to experience it at least once," I said.

Chris grabbed my right arm without hesitation and examined the native-american patterns that winded up the skin. The other guy presented himself as Mike.

"Why haven't you shown these earlier?" Chris asked, almost sounding angry.

"Didn't feel like the right environment for showing them off, that's all," I said.

"But that dude who's friends with your sister shows his off every day."

Thump-thump.

My heart jolted at the mere mention of Ash, and I scanned the room again but he was still a no-show.

"Guess you gotta ask him why," I mumbled and squirmed a little in my seat.

Chris seemed to lose interest in my tattoos pretty quickly and I was left sitting there with my beer while he and Mike argued over Tinder girls. If Ash didn't show up soon this would be a repeat of that disastrous time I went out with Chris after work. I simply couldn't pretend to be interested in what Chris and Mike talked about, even if I tried. I looked out over the crowd again in pure agony, and there he was.

He was moving through the crowd with ease, saying hi to left and right and the women were practically gawking at him when he past them smiling confidently. It was like he owned the place and my insides started to buzz at the sight of him. He caught my eye and cracked up in a smile that should have been illegal and plopped down beside me in the booth. Chris looked up from his phone and it took him a while to process who Ash was.

"Damn, everybody seems to dress up tonight," Chris said with a grin. "Nice jacket, a step up from that apron, right?"

"If you want, I can pop downstairs and fetch it if it makes you feel and better?" Ash countered teasingly.

Chris' laugh had a glimmer of insecurity and I enjoyed seeing him lose that usual pose as cool dude. Mike entered the conversation and dismantled it a bit by asking about the brand of the jacket and soon everything was flowing with ease again. I sat calm and just listened to the others talking, feeling content and relaxed. Just having Ash beside me made able to do anything it felt like.

Chris had started to tap on his phone again and returned to the subject of Tinder girls and suddenly he held up his phone to us.

"I got a date with her tonight," he said proudly. "What do you say, would you fuck her?"

Mike nodded absentmindedly and I kept my mouth shut as usual.

"Not a chance," I heard Ash say. "But you go ahead."

"What? Why? She's gorgeous, and look at those tits," Chris said in disappointment.

"I only fuck guys."

I almost choked on my beer and at the same second a hand landed on my thigh under the table. Had Ash actually said what he just said? Had he been that brutally upfront? Apparently so because Chris just gaped at him. Fingers trailed up my thigh to my groin and I clenched my teeth. What was Ash doing? In his other hand he openly played with my tie, that he had removed from his pocket.

"Really?" Chris said surprised. "But then you can get laid all the time, right? You guys have that sex app?"

"Grindr, you mean?" Ash said and a finger glided along my hardening cock, and I couldn't tear my eyes off the damn tie that was sliding between his fingers.

"Yeah, exactly. You can hook up in no time if you have it, right?"

"I don't bother with it," Ash said grinning. "I have this special guy I can call at any time, day or night, he never turns me down."

Chris looked impressed and I locked my eyes on the table to hide my reddening cheeks.

"So he puts up every time?" Chris asked, apparently very interested.

"If he puts up? He's a fucking pillow prince," Ash grinned.

"Pillow prince, what the hell is that?" I heard myself ask and regretted it as the words left my mouth.

"It means that he likes to receive."

Neither dead animals or anything else was helping now. I was so hard it was almost painful and the only thing in my mind now was Ash's hand, his fingers teasing the head of my cock through the jeans, his thigh pressing against mine under the table. I wanted to get out of here, I needed to get out of here with him. Anywhere. Right now.

"I can... get us all some more drinks," I said, my voice strained. "Wanna help, Ash?"

Ash gave me a crooked smile but nodded. Then he got up, effectively blocking the view from the others so that nobody could see my prominent bulge. I followed him closely and when we were out of earshot I grabbed his arm.

"I need... we need to go somewhere... now," I hissed between clenched teeth. "I'll die if I don't..."

He didn't say a word, just pulled me through the crowd towards a door saying 'staff only' and pushed me inside and locked the door. I couldn't keep it in anymore and seized the collar of his jacket and pressed him to the cold concrete wall and kissed him fiercely. He quickly unbuttoned my jeans and released my aching erection and I grinded against him in pure desperation.

"Shit, did you get this hard that fast?" he breathed, and I just managed to nod.

He grabbed my cock firmly with one hand and dug his fingers into the hair on my neck and put his forehead to mine. No niceties, just raw and pure desire.

"I wanna take you right here, right now, you know that?" Ash growled and jerked me off hard and fast. "I wanna fuck you against this wall until I make you scream."

"Nnh... yeah..." I moaned and reveled at his words.

He stared into my eyes with that blue, carnal gaze, our foreheads pressed together, and I just knew I wouldn't last more than seconds.

"I would fuck you so hard you wouldn't be able to use your legs, kitten. I would have to carry you out to the others, and they would know that you had been fucked by me."

"Oooh, fuck yesss..." I groaned and ecstasy hit me like lightning.

I clung to him shaking as he caught my cum in his hand, smeared it along my shaft until I just stood there totally spent, panting. It had been over in less than two minutes, and I was dizzy with the sudden release.

"Thanks..." was the only word I could think of, and Ash laughed.

"I could see that it was urgent," he grinned. "And I guess it was my fault too. Your tie must pay the price now."

He wiped his hand on it and started to wipe my crotch, but that made me yank the tie from him.

"If you continue like that it'll become urgent again," I said and cleaned myself up.

"I gotta say I'm feeling quite proud of that." Ash grinned and corrected the collar of his jacket. "Up for being social again?"

I had such a pep in my step when I returned with Ash to the party that I almost felt giddy. We had gotten the drinks from the bar that we had promise Chris and Mike and talked with them some more. After a while our CEO had entered the stage, giving a blabbering speech about how proud he was of the company. He was replaced by a piss poor cover band, but people danced like crazy anyway. Ash had found some people from the kitchen and started talking to them and I continued with Chris. When the band was finished and the regular music was on again, my boss called me over to her table, so I went to her. Her cheeks blushed and I had never seen her this lively. Maybe company parties weren't so bad after all.

"James, so good to see you here for once," she said and smiled so wide that I started to wonder how much she had to drink.

"Well, I had to try it out sooner or later," I said, trying to joke and she nodded.

"You did a fantastic job on that bug we had a couple of days ago," she continued. "You really didn't have to bother, but you solved it in a day, amazing!"

"Thanks," I replied and glanced around the room.

I had lost sight of Ash a while ago and now I couldn't find him. It made me vaguely uneasy, and I didn't understand why. But he was my anchor here, he was the one that made me feel like I could belong here somehow. Finally, I located his black ruffled hair some yards away. He was standing talking to a guy I didn't recognize. The guy had his arm against the wall and was leaning towards Ash.

What is... happening?

"James? Did you hear what I just said?"

My boss' voice came from far away.

"What?" I said and watched as the guy flashed a brilliant smile at something Ash said.

"What do you think about being in charge of bug handling?"

"Uhm... Yeah sure."

I didn't listen anymore. All my attention was aimed at Ash and that guy. Both looked at me for a short second and smiled at each other and Ash nodded at something the guy said.

"Great, let's talk on Monday."

"Uhm... I have to go now. Excuse me."

It was like going through a swamp when I started walking towards Ash. I looked at the guy, he pulled his fingers through his shoulder-length, auburn hair. He was just as tall as Ash; his eyes were dark and he seemed to be very aware of his looks. It was the same aura that Ash had, and Ash seemed to think everything that the guy said was funny. A cold, dead hand started squeezing my chest until it felt like it would shatter from the inside. That guy had everything I didn't have. And he knew how to flirt, that was obvious.

But what exclusive right did I have to Ash? We had never talked about it, what it was we had, what we were. We had never decided if we were dating, or even of we were just fuck buddies with no strings. Maybe Ash looked at it that way? He had so much more experience than I did and had no problems in vocalizing it if he liked someone. Did I even have the right to be jealous? Was I jealous? I had no idea.

Finally, I came up to them and the guy gave me a quick scan but returned to Ash again.

"Gotta go," he said. "But I'll see you."

"Absolutely," Ash replied, and a poison-laced arrow hit my gut as he smiled at the guy and then turned to me. "Jamie, I looked for you, but I didn't see you anywhere."

I suddenly felt nauseous and swallowed hard.

"My boss wanted to talk to me," I said, trying to sound unaffected.

"You wanna head home? It seems like there's more drunk people than fun people here now."

I nodded and followed him to the elevators. My head was reeling now, and I just wanted to go home. Pull my blanket over my head. Disappear. I saw Ash's mouth moving when we got out in the street, but I couldn't hear a word he was saying.

"Hey," I said, interrupting him. "I'm feeling dead tired. Need to recharge my batteries a bit, you know. Me being introvert and all. So, I think I'm gonna sleep at my place tonight."

Ash looked at me in surprise.

"Ok?" he said slowly. "Something going on? You look... kinda out of it?"

Discretely he caressed the back of my hand with his index finger and studied me, a serious expression on his face. I used all my remaining energy to smile effortlessly while my insides were in utter chaos.

"Oh no, it's nothing, I'm just tired. Talk later!"

Then I turned on the spot and started walking home.

"Sleep well," I heard him say from behind me.

I drew a painful breath and just held up my hand as an answer.