Jumping around the room, shivering, while trying to get dressed, I couldn't seem to get my foot into my trouser leg. Shit, why was it so cold? It felt like the next ice age had decided to kick off in my house. Having eventually dealt with my clothes, and tapping out a Morse-code message with my teeth, I skipped sprightly to the kitchen in search of something warming. Oddly, the thermometer was showing the usual 23°.

Bundled up in a blanket and armed with a cup of cognac-laced coffee, I hit the Internet to find the answer to the perennial question: WTF? The cognac entered my system in small doses and was exclusively for medicinal purposes. Namely to warm up and calm down. It worked.

The seasoned gamers on the forum assured me the cold I was experiencing was absolutely normal after the first few immersions. It was like a phantom pain, the body continuing to feel what it had recently experienced in the pod. With time the brain became used to the virtuality, and would react correctly to changing conditions.

Next in line for research were the tieflings. Who were they, and what did you eat them with? Ha ha. If I'm honest, I didn't understand the nature of the bonus I'd undertaken all this for. The more I read about Kvalen's race on the official website, the more questions I had for the developers.

Reference information

Tiefling

A closed race. A half-demon, born of a fire demon and a creature of another race. Appearance depends on the demon parent, but all representatives have horns, a tail, hooved lower limbs, and monotone black eyes. In order to adapt to life in Barliona, tieflings have lost their demonic power, fire resistance and enhanced survivability. Their demon ancestry has resulted in Barliona residents' negative attitude towards half-demons.

Race abilities of fire tieflings

· Increased basic value for Agility (+3 each 10 levels) and Intellect (+3 each 10 levels)

· Increased fire resistance (+50 %)

· Increased demon magic (+30 %)

· Increased resistance to demon magic (+50 %)

· Total-darkness vision

Race weaknesses of fire tieflings

· Decreased basic value for Strength (-3 each 10 levels) and Stamina (-3 each 10 levels)

· Increased harm from Barliona magic (+30 %)

· Inability to study Barliona magic

· Weak reaction of healing incantations to Barliona magic (-50 % to healing)

· Growth rate for Agreeability to NPCs also decreased by 50 %

A search for the term "closed race" bemused me. If the guides were to be believed, players could not choose their own race, class, or anything else marked "closed." However, apart from myself there was another player swimming in the lava, and he was on a social contract. Interesting.

Over and over I reread the information and weighed up my prospects. I categorically disagreed with the developers that having a goat as your character was a great bonus, but there was nothing I could do about it. According to the rules of random generation, I would have to run around cloven-hooved for a month, maybe longer. Things weren't looking good. Not only would NPCs be hostile to me because of my demon genealogy, but players would also turn up the heat.

I didn't know how to go on. If I deleted my account and created a new one, I could only recoup my money in three months' time. And the refund system was very unclear. I wasn't about to risk my savings, so I wrote an official enquiry to client support concerning a refund and having being made a tiefling. Everything by the book.

"Hi. Are you asleep?" After finishing my letter I called Matt, only glancing at the clock when it was already too late.

"Hi," he replied croakily, before yawning into the microphone. "I'm asleep."

Sleep in Barliona was never sound, but social players had no choice. They had no time or place to relax.

"Shit, I wasn't thinking."

"Rom, call whenever you like. There'll be time for sleep."