《Just a Simple Guy》8 - The elderly are secretly monsters
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Despite what lies some may say Salim did not pass out. On the contrary he let out a yell of pain before falling backwards blood flying over his head as his head slammed into the back of the cart.
“Oh come on I didn’t hit you that hard boy get up now!” A shrill voice shouted out to Salim breaking him from his stupor of pain. He had no doubt that there was a large imprint of that pole on his face that would stay for days.
“I told you to get up!” The voice said yelling at Salim and suddenly felt an arm grab his leg and throw him out of the cart causing him to splay out on the ground. Whoever did that was a fucking monster.
Sitting up quickly as to avoid getting thrown again Salim’s body grimacing feeling the creaking and aching muscles scream.
Looking in the direction of the shrill voice Salim spied an old lady. She wore a simple gown along with the nicest complexion that would make you identify her as a cute little grandmother who loved to spoil her grandkids.
But Salim knew otherwise he knew how much strength that small little frame could contain and he would not be tricked into taking her cookies.
Well maybe he would take her cookies. But he wouldn’t be tricked into complacency by her unassuming stature. It would take quite a few cookies before he could feel that safe.
She spoke again looking down on his fallen form. “Well?”
Salim was utterly confused not knowing what to say and was only able to reply with an offhanded grunt.
The little grandmother didn’t seem to take kindly to that response as she stomped her foot the earth cracking beneath her and let out a huff. “The youth just don’t appreciate the kindness of the elderly these days…”
How could Salim retort to that? He had been essentially kidnapped, beaten across the face with a stick, and then thrown five feet into the dirt.
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Standing up and cracking his back Salim sent a level stare to the little woman who could probably kill him with a simple punch. “What can I help you with ma’am.”
When one is in life threatening situations it is best to be polite.
The godly grandmother looked at him judging Salim for a couple of seconds before letting out a giggle of laughter. Salim relaxed his shoulders as he saw her visibly laugh at what he said. That was good if she thought he was funny she wouldn’t want to kill him.
Salim didn’t believe his run and hide skill would be enough to save his ass this time if she could zip around him without being seen.
The woman turned away and motioned for him to follow her. Salim not one to disappoint all powerful beings followed her back to the cart and jumped into the back as she took the reigns.
She called out to the horse to get moving and they were back on the road again.
Silence overtook them for a while as the sound of moving wheels overtook the silence.
Salim was watched the granny with rapid eye movements trying to watch for any type of movement that would indicate a staff or hand coming his way. He stayed like this for several minutes simply sitting and watching her.
Then he remembered something that he should have done earlier and began the process of information gathering.
??????? of Domenui Lv. 152
????/????
An unknown old lady with mysterious powers.
Great. He only learned her level and maybe where she was from. Based on the time period with Balurm, people must not have lasts names so that was at least a little bit more information as well.
Now he knew he really didn’t want to piss her off with that level of hers being a little more than fifteen times higher than his meager ten. He realised observe served a two fold purpose both in keeping humans alive a little longer and mellow their perspectives. At least the ones that would listen to reason.
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Quickly getting bored of these intelligible thoughts Salim looked around at their surroundings and not so much his surprise they were still in this grassy plain of nothing. Well maybe not nothing as he could still see a large trail of smoke coming from the area behind them.
Maybe it was a good thing that he got abducted by this insane grandmother. He had no idea where he was going and being on a cart was better than sprinting and resting or just walking. Still though he had no idea where or what was going on.
Turning back to the front of the cart he was met face to face with GG (short for god granny).
Startled Salim fell backwards unbalanced from shock and the carts irregular movements.
GG glared at him for a few moments before posing a question that was crystal clear to his ears even over the rumbling of the cart.
“Who are you kid?”
Salim still a bit unsettled by the woman began to scramble for words trying to come up with something. Finally with a strong certainty in his voice he gave his answer.
“I am an alien that has come through unknown circumstances to this foreign land.”
The grandmother stared at him for a moment with a look of confusion and something that seemed to say “Is this kid fucking retarded?” Unfortunately Salim was very familiar with that look and he knew what was probably coming next.
With a roll of her eyes the elderly lady simply retorted. “No kid what's your name?”
Huh, that wasn’t really what he was expecting although it was better than what he normally got. “Salim…” Was his ambiguous and mysterious sounding reply.
That was responded kindly with a good role of the eyes from the other party.
“Well anyway kid my name is Beth.” Beth said staring Salim down hard.
Wow. That name was a lot more boring than he expected from this ultra ass kicking grandmother. He wasn’t insulting it or anything! He… he was just kinda disappointed.
Turning around and sitting down with a loud thump Beth looked back at the road and began speaking to Salim without looking at him.
“Your lucky kid. You were sleeping underneath a Munit, a tree that eats any traveller who is dumb enough to sleep under it. I saw you as I was passing through and decided to give some pity for your sad ass.”
Well that was certainly humbling… Was everything in this world hostile to him? First was a fucking MOON goblin who came from space then it was a killer tree? His luck was truly terrible.
Beth continued.
“You seemed to be unfamiliar of this place if you were sleeping so willingly under one of those things and if you don’t object I’ll take you to the closest city Val. All sorts of trade comes through there so I am sure you will find your destination. The trip will still be a couple more days worth so prepare to work so we can get there smoothly.”
Salim didn’t object as most of what she had said was pretty much spot on and he would rather not say no to helping her. Both for his continued survival and success in this world.
Beth trailed off into silence after the ending proposal so both ended up sitting in awkward silence. Salim didn’t want to piss her off by asking too many questions and Beth didn’t care about him.
And so they sat that way. Salim in the back and Beth in the front traveling on the long road as it splayed out in front of them.
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