《Intergalactic Cultural Research》Results and Departure

Advertisement

Finlay spent his mornings out on runs, his days in The Stray. Watching the combat tests with the regulars, as the number of examinees dwindled. It looked like it wasn't just the culinary finals but for any trade wanting to make it to space. There were scientists, engineers, active duty soldiers, religion and philosophy scholars from all over the world. From the details given during the application process, they had a max capacity of 1000 human individuals to be further spilt among the I.U. planetary stations to spread their knowledge, while learning whatever they wanted. Turns out they didn't usually have to narrow down winning results, until they met Humanity.

Too many of us, too good at what we do.

The highlight reel was a spectacle worthy of the Super-Bowl, cheers and shouts echoed across nations as their representatives were put on screens. Betting pools were opened on who would get to go or not. Nicknames and memes alike were tossed around. Finlay had a good chuckle browsing the ones made about him, Jaunty pirate tunes and all. Seeing warhammer dude just throw his weapon like a discount Thor into the skull of a giant snake holo was... sobering to say the least. Xiao lu had handled the test with much more style than he had, and the memes were hilarious. He's a crowd favorite to win along with a few others.

Kathy Clark tripped her Boar-like opponent up with a whip of all things. Berthold had similar results to Finlay with his bow and arrow, blinding his land-squid enemy before it ran off. Hada Ryou let the feathered bull beast charge her and run into her sword... where were these reasonably sized monsters for his fight, huh?

It was 4 restless nights until they started announcing their selections, hours of listening for his name. The bar had never been so quiet, the occasional clank of cutlery and whispered orders were the only sounds. It only added to everyone's tension, which led to Finlay having 2 more shots then he'd usually have to calm down. Names and positions being listed off in the background through the TV.

Advertisement

"Engineer: Tyson Cutty. Scientist: James A Greer. Father: Patrick O'Cathans Soldier: Lucas W. Timbs Chef: Hada Ryou..." Cutting back out to other news events for the next 20 minutes... so he wasn't in that batch.

"Chef Finlay P. Roberts?"

"Yes?" Spinning on the stool a full rotation only to snap and spin again to face what he only saw for a second the first go around. "Chef Ziq'drie?"

"Hello! I must say this establishment smells fantastic!"

"What're-What are you doing here? I thought only delegates stepped out of the Knowledge Center?"

"Well I asked for special permission, explore the local food scene... speaking of which." Taking a seat next to Finlay at the bar. "I'll have the top 3 best selling dishes."

"Dean! B-C patty, Coco-bread, Jerk chicken and fries... make the dip single heat and a Tres leche for dessert."

"3 milk?"

"Type of cake, not Jamaican but still delicious and great for a hot day... you want some Traditional Jamaican dessert you're gonna be dissapointed. Bulla bread, spice buns, coconut drops... not really restaurant material."

"Ah... but you seemed well versed in sweets, I thought that may have been your thing."

"I like making desserts personally, but Jamaican cuisine... more meat and veg focused."

"Well then... I hope you'll be willing to share that knowledge."

"Of course I am, just uh... waiting for my name to come up..." glancing back at the screen.

"...Finlay... It's going to come up."

"Y-you don't know that, I mean there were thousands of peo-"

"I do know that."

He swiveled back around to look Ziq in her compound eyes. "Is this- are you..."

"I said I came out here to explore food culture." Placing a cloth wrapped bundle in front of the chef. "Didn't say it was the only thing I was doing... Congratulations!"

Both of them flinched as the other patrons cheered, of course they had been listening in. A white and purple Mantid-woman walks into a bar, isn't just the start of a raunchy Kre'tee joke. It grabs the attention of anyone who hasn't seen one before. Momma Roberts practically jumped the bar to hug the both of them close. "NEXT 2 ROUNDS ARE FREE!" The rest of that night was a blur, shots and stories shared by all to celebrate the confirmation, and yet another shot once his name did get announced on the TV.

Advertisement

The Morning After.

"...Oh... Ahhhhh... regret... so much regret." He usually stopped before he came anywhere close to a hangover... now it was in full swing thrumming in his temples. cold sweats plastering him to the cool, refreshing shower tiles. "Praise Jesus for ceramic." Opting to lay there for a few more minutes before hauling himself out and over to the Sink, a few splashes to clear the eyes. Only noticing the new additions to his arms. "...The fuck are these?"

"The rest of your combat uniform, Holo-Augment bracers. Wisely, you decided to leave the pistol in it's holster."

"I have a gun now?"

"Yes and no. I have control over whether or not it fires, until an emergency situation arises."

"...I should've named you sky-net..."

"Hilarious... now then your flight departs in 34 hours. Treasure Island Ascent port. Pack up your personal belongings."

"Flight? Already? Don't I get some time to say goodbye?"

"You have 14 friends on FB and 12 of them were at the bar... you'll be fine."

"...Wow... I need to get out more..."

"You also have 13, 546 friend requests.... those all came in since the Preliminary began."

"Ah... So, just a carry on then?"

After recovering from his hangover, packing and doing another quick round of goodbyes. He was at the Ascent station, he'd be launched into space, picked up by Orbital, from Orbital to D.S.T. {Deep Space Transit} all the way to I.U. Planetary Station 4. Even in space, travel can be a hassle. The pod looked... simple would be an understatement. A Glass ball with a padded floor...

"... Trust the advanced alien tech Finlay... It'll all be fine... Don't fucking jinx it by saying it'll all be fine." A quick hop inside and the ball sealed up... with him inside... like a fish in a tank. "Great... lovely... all will be fiiiiiiiiiiiiiine." Sinking to his knees as it left purchase with the water... going up... up... and up. "Oh I hate this."

It was uncomfortable floating magically up into orbit and internally horrifying as he just remained to do so in the deep blackness of space. sat cross-legged in the ball watching the stars... waiting for anything to just zip over and scoop him up like he was told was gonna happen... any second now... any second.

2 God damned hours later and he was finally on "Solid" ground in a large ship, going through what he assumed was customs. He checked his bag in, and was getting scanned. Another Kre'tee was going through it with him, then the bio-scan pinged.

"Sir, do you have any non-standard Cybernetic implants or produce and or coated yourself with unregistered Biological material?"

"Uhm, No? I mean I put some Coconut hair oil on my-"

"Sir, could you please follow me for a further screening?"

"Oh come on. Even in space?" Gently being guided to a corner, where special little bars slowly hovered around him.

"Even in space." Getting the runaround by the TSA. Some things are just... Universal.

    people are reading<Intergalactic Cultural Research>
      Close message
      Advertisement
      You may like
      You can access <East Tale> through any of the following apps you have installed
      5800Coins for Signup,580 Coins daily.
      Update the hottest novels in time! Subscribe to push to read! Accurate recommendation from massive library!
      2 Then Click【Add To Home Screen】
      1Click