Aaaand …. nope nothing ….

As I came to I was once again shrouded in darkness.

Seems like I wasn’t born after all. No, wait! …. Could it be? Was I born ... blind?

Oh for the love of God! That *peeep* …. huh? was I just *peep*ed?

Ok …. lets try it out ….

You fuckin *peep* I wish you would *peeep* and *peeep*! Oh for fucks sake *Peeep*...*peeeeeeep* ….

….

…. urm … ok …. that’s … strange. So it seems like I was born blind and my thoughts are censored.

Ah sh#t now the only thing missing is an arch-nemesis that has an unreasonable hatred for me and tries to kill me all the time. Wait did I just raise a flag? Oh sh#t!

“kuhuhuhu”

Suddenly my thoughts were interrupted by a strange high but melodic chuckle that resonated in my brain.

Huh? What the hell! Who is there?

I tried to scream but somehow I couldn't make a sound.

Wait … sound? Now that I am focusing on it … there is no sound. And I mean none in like total silence.

That is so strange what is happening, where am I?

“kuhuhu”

And there is that damn laughter again! Shut the fuck up I am thinking here! Or wait since it was in my head am I not only blind but also crazy? Oh no, I do not want this life this is sh#t! buhuhuhu ~

“Hahaha this mortal is funny! I didn’t know that they had so much talent…”

Suddenly a clear and melodic voice interrupted my thoughts and I froze.

“But you know it is rude to tell me to “shut up“. Haaa, you are really lucky that I had such a good day today if not you would be dead by now and couldn’t even comprehend what happened to you...“

I felt shame taking over my emotions and since it was obvious that the voice could hear my thoughts I send a small “sorry” in its direction.

“Humpf … well, it is kind of my fault as well…”

How?

“Hey! Don’t interrupt me when I am speaking!”

Sorry ~

“Yes, yes … where was I? Right! You were so funny right from the moment you appeared here that I totally forgot to give you back your senses … well, here they come … urm, just endure ok?”

Huh what should I - … Gaaa!

Suddenly biting pain spread through my body or better my being since I still wasn’t sure what I was at this moment and I almost fainted from the pain.

Just when I was about to lose it the pain vanished as fast as it came.

You mother fucking *peeep* ….

Everything I wanted to say stuck in my throat as I finally opened my eyes to the place I was in, the *peep*-ing tone fading into the background and becoming something of a tinnitus as my mind cursed at the sight before my eyes.

But somehow I couldn’t really comprehend what it thought as everything felt like my mind was wrapped in cotton.

It seems that I am some kind of ...

Lightbulb ... no, it was better to describe myself as a floating ball of light that hovered over a suspiciously looking white chair that seemed to glow.

I was in some kind of wide white room with a panorama window on one side. Looking around, everything else was devoid of any kind of decoration, except that one wall.

On the opposite wall of the window, I could see portraits of different kind of people ... The whole wall was plastered with them.

I could see a knight in shining armor stabbing their sword through the head of a dragon, a woman sitting next to a sick person glowing in a bright light and enveloping the sick one and much more. Even some that did not look quite human. No, more like real storybook monsters.

But the most disturbing thing was that they seem to be alive in their pictures and given the way some of them opened their mouths I was also sure they screamed while doing whatever they were doing.

Not that I could hear them. The only sense that I right now had was my sight ...

The others still tingling and not really under my control.

That gave me quite a helpless feeling.

Tearing my gaze from the picture wall, I let it roam around the room until I concentrated on the space right in front of my chair that I still hovered over.

In front of me was a large oak desk with a plate "Deli - Receptionist of Allfather" on top of it.

But the little note "not by choice" kind of destroyed the tense feeling the plate created in me. Given my state of being and the window that showed something I only normally had seen in an observatory, which means in plain English the universe, or better galaxies, since it seems there were many more adjoining groups of stars next to the one I knew quite well, and the fact that it seems like the room we were in moved from one galaxy to another as time went by, as well as the state of being I experienced, my brain started conjuring many different theories but most of them ended in the fact that I was dead, and before I could be reborn, which seems to have been the case before I tried experimenting with the glowing sparks, I must be somewhere in-between heaven or hell, even though I did not believe in such concepts seeing the possibility of reincarnation and the view out of the window let me doubt this conviction very fast.

Still not having come to terms what was happening I felt something poke my being from the front, making me involuntarily looking up.

Behind the desk sat a beauty ... which seemed to have poked me with some kind of crane or pointer that looked quite strange with some kind of rainbow-colored smoke covering it.

But the person that poked me stole my breath away. You couldn't say anything else other than "transcendent beauty" since any words trying to describe this creature in front of me felt insufficient.

She seemed to be made out of light and darkness. The left side of her had glowing blond hair like a radiant sun and a dark almost bottomless eye while her right side had dark hair that seemed to swallow the light and a shining golden eye.

But the most intimidating thing about her was her surroundings.

It felt like around her light and darkness would battle each other and there seemed to be no end to this battle.

“Well did you have your fill?”

The beauty's lips moved while the voice once again sounded in my head.

I could see her lips forming into a smirk her right eye dancing with laughter while her left gave out an annoyed feeling. I mentally gulped and trying to rescue the situation just thought

“You were so beautiful that I was just captured by your beauty!”

Well, there is nothing better than flattery and even more so when it is true.

She looked astonished by my answer, widening her eyes a bit.

But what made me a bit nervous was the frown that had started to build on her beautiful face as she gained her bearings again.

I kind of just stared at her, even if I wasn't quite sure I had eyes, but well, that was just a technicality right?

I could still see and my sight drank in her wondrous appearance that let my inside feel warm and funny.

She seemed to be amused by my stare and chuckled lightly.

"Well do we want to start again? Let’s see how do I normally start … Oh, yes!

*Echem* Hello young one, how can I help you?"

I just stared at her … Was she for real? She wants me to forget the last few moments in which she made me question my sanity, *peep*-ing my speech and giving me a sensory overload that still tingled in my nerve endings? What the *peeeep*. And can somebody be so kind and shut off this annoying censor! I am getting a headache and it makes me aggressive.

"Hahaha ~ Well I see that this is too much to ask for but you have to excuse my behavior you are the first soul that is so amusing and has the gall to curse in front of a god. Even if it is just in your mind, and yes it isn’t illegal to censor the mind where you are right now. Hohohoho ~”

Aaand she gives a typical villain laugh. Haaa ~

“Ok, ok, was that too much? Wow, you really don’t understand any fun. OK, let’s start with the job. Are you ready? Well not that that really matters …. OK, here it goes.”

Suddenly she started to shine and a beam shot from her to my being.

Hhmmmm ~ Well, well, that is interesting.

"You still seem to have a tight connection with the mortal world and so you are not spiritual enough to talk to me ... but your soul is so pure that you can hear me ...

What do I do with you, huh? Hell, Heaven or Life?"

I was a bit confused ...

…"mortal world" … "spiritual"? what the hell is she talking about?

But then suddenly my hearing returned right when she started her last two sentences and I was petrified.

Of course, I was surprised that suddenly the tingling has stopped and I could once again hear the normal sounds around me, the silence that had enveloped me and was only disturbed by the Goddess voice seemed like a distant memory, and firstly I was overwhelmed by the noise the pictures on the wall made but what really stumped me was what she said and how she said it.

I could finally hear the full sound of her godly voice and I was mentally blown away.

Her voice was as mysterious as her looks, at one point high and clear like an angel but suddenly changing into another dark and a bit hushed one...

I could not really explain it but it felt like even her voice was in a

conflict like her whole being was, not knowing if it was light or dark.

However what I really found disturbing was the order in which she gave me my options. But I wasn't one to complain, even if I could speak which I still wasn't sure I could but the feeling I had advised me against even trying.

That was all well and good but how the hell did I get here? And no I am not choosing hell so please don’t smile like that … It’s disturbing … but for the good measure... Hihihihi ~ HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE???

*chuckle*

"Little one you can stop that I can hear your thoughts without you blasting into my mind what you want. And even if you blast them you are too weak to make your mental voice loud enough to disturb me. Hohohoho ~

Well for your question ... you did the dumbest thing in history! You succeeded in killing yourself just before you were born. I stopped time immediately to take you here and talk to you as to understand why you did what you did even thought you are a great genius and such a strong soul … but it seems like you unfortunately do not possess a self preservation instinct or yours is as damaged as your current mortal body, and what the consequences will be for you.

Just so you know you created a great chaos up here and since I have to clean it all up since good old dad decided to take a vacation I am not having you in my good books right now… even if you are funny to watch"

I looked at her a bit helpless and signalled her that I had no idea what she is talking about. The frown marring her face turned into a real scowl and she gave me a death glare at the last few sentences making me shake in my imaginary boots.

She looked reluctant but suddenly started to explain to me a few things such as her position as a receptionist and her workload that seems to have doubled when I killed myself since something like that had never happened before, but seeing that I had no knowledge of my new world and could not really relate to her problems she just sighed stood up and touched my soul.

Suddenly all kind of information floated my brain making me dizzy. Also, I had a burning sensation in my being that seems to expand as more and more information flowed into me and in the end, I realized that I could finally talk to her.

The next few ... hours? ... We talked about God and the world and I mean that literally. At first, it was quite awkward as she was still angry with me and I could not bring myself to tell her my opinion but as we started to talk about her fellow gods she got into her element and the things she said ... I am still not sure that an adult should even hear them ... but well at least her mood got better right?

And she told me that I would forget most of what we talked about since my mortal brain would be too small for all the information I absorbed into my soul, so, while my soul had them I would experience harsh headaches if I tried to remember them until I was an adult and could comprehend everything, so, on Prena I could only count on what my new parents told me until I got bigger and then I would still have few situations where I only remembered something after I made the mistake ....

But hey her mood improved ... that is good, right? ... It seems she had wanted to have someone to talk with for quite some time and was bored with the other Gods in here, a plane between heaven and hell that governed all space that existed, and had found nobody to gossip with.

Having a soul in front of her that could very well not run away and would more likely

start shaking in fear then get angry at her nasty remarks she had found her perfect sacrifice in me ...

So I had no way out of our discussion...

But well, I always had a fixation of acquiring knowledge so I wanted to confirm all the information she gave me and of course asked her about the moving picture wall.

Apparently on this wall were pictures of very strong souls that contributed greatly to the balance of the world ... which still seemed to contain a piece of their souls to entertain her while she was bored from the desk work.

Well, but it seems like I made quite a mess by experimenting around. The balance I destroyed by accepting the "force" which she called “mana” into my body while still being in my mother's womb ... kind of never happened before and was the reason why Deli was at first pissed off about my existence when she heard me. When I heard that I was once again shaking in my imaginary boots, seems to become a habit lately.

The smirk she had on her face when she stated that didn’t help much.

Of course when she noticed my mental state she was quick to clarify that my behaviour when she observed me had such a positive impact that she was willing to give me a second chance and was now very happy about her past decision .

But she still complained about the load of paperwork she had to fill out just to explain how it was possible that something like this could have ever happened was

so large that it reached the edge of the chair I floated over ... sorry?

Oh, and I also found out something quite scary.

Deli seems to be the receptionist of the Allfather since she ... kind of blew up a whole universe while being drunk. Can't seem to remember it but since then she was demoted and placed directly under the controls of the Allfather. But well, that was what she said, given her smile while telling me about it did not really reassure me of that fact. Not that I could do anything against it but I was very sure that I would never want to anger her.

How we came to that topic?

After three hours of unbearable Godly gossip, I finally found the courage to ask her about her desk sign. At first, she acted like a little child, it seems the last few thousand years were so boring that they fried a few circuits in her brain or she is just really immature I am not so sure on that topic. But after begging her she finally revealed that the Allfather was the supreme being in all existence that ruled over space, time and the souls of the living as well as the ones of the dead.

Oh and he is the father of Deli. Who seems to be the only blood-related child of him, well together with her two brothers whose names I couldn’t get out of her. She just said that they were like dogs, you say their name and they come no matter how softly you utter them.

Well … at least they are not being compared with cockroaches. That should be a good thing right?

But back to the Allfather. It seems like he doesn’t really have this parenting thing down quite right even if he is the being that existed since the beginning of time.

After hearing Deli ranting about him and his behavior it seems more like he lets them do everything that they want and only if they directly challenge him are they punished.

Somehow I am surprised that Deli seems to be such a relatively decent person, well apart from the few galaxies that she destroyed and the countless pranks she daily plays on the other Gods which are mostly deadly or at least lead to grave wounds, even without any kind of decent upbringing. There has to be more but she wouldn’t tell me of it shutting completely up whenever I asked questions in that direction. Then she sat there for a few minutes in her chair staring out her panorama window with a sad and lonely expression.

Suddenly the feeling in the room changed and Deli became quite serious.

"Now little one, it seems like our time has come to an end and you decide what you want to do. If you don’t, your chance of life will be nullified since your body will die in the mortal plane. Now choose wisely. I will bless you and I also have a little gift for you since you entertained me and gave me such a good outlet. Live your new life or stay here with me."

I after mulling over my choices I told her that I would like to try living again and she seemed really excited.

“Oh, I almost forgot. You will forget all of your memories from your old life and our meeting when you are born. Well, then we will see each other once again after your death. I hope you can entertain me when the time has come and give me a few interesting stories of your life.”

I was sad about the loss of knowledge but before I could answer her I once again felt like I was sucked away but somehow a bad feeling stayed in my gut about the excitement she seems to radiate which she only did once before when she talked about that one Goddess that she wanted to trap in an endless hell... *shiver*

"I wish you good luck"

And I saw a vicious smirk emerge on her face.

... Was it really the right choice?