《The Quest For The Golden Turd: Book Form》The Golden Tower
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"A tower?!" Daniel exclaimed
"How did they build this they are only 2 people if you count the golden turd!"
Daniel entered the tower and noticed how many floors there are
"200 Floors?!".
Daniel realized there was an elevator
"Oh, i will just take the eleva.... It is out of order."
Daniel takes a deep breath
"NOOOOOOO!"
So Daniel started to climb the stairs.
As he was climbing he found out that each floor was 10 feel tall.
"I am going to be 60 when i get to the top."
Mean while at the top or the tower
"HAHAHA!" The golden turd exclaimed.
"Daniel will never get up here because i put fake out of order signs on the elevators!"
"You sick monster!" Sage exclaimed
"Daniel will be 60 when he gets up here!"
"That is why I did it!" The golden turd exclaimed
Mean while when Daniel went up 60 flights of stairs
"I...Am....So.....Tired." Daniel said
He rested his elbow on the elevator and noticed that the elevator wasn't broken
"Wooow the fake out of order trick huh? Well good thing i can just use the elevator now!"
Daniel enters the elevator and clicks the 200th floor
"Sage I am coming for you!"
Mean while at the top of the tower again
tick. tock. tick. tock.
"Ugh when will there be something interesting around here?" The golden turd said
*Ding* the elevator opens
"Daniel?! So you figured it out eh?"
"Yes, I did, now give Sage back!" Daniel exclaimed
"Oh, Him? Come and get him!" The golden turd exclaimed
He puched Sage off the open window
"AHHHH!" Sage exclaimed
Daniel, very mad shoved the golden turd aside and jumped out the window
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"Do not worry the ground is poop so you will not get hurt!" Daniel exclaimed
Then they both hit the ground and the poop broke Daniel and Sage's fall
"Ewwww." Daniel and Sage Said
Daniel and Sage were so happy that they were together again
"We need to go back up to fight and capture the golden turd!" Daniel exclaimed
"Not so fast." The poo guardian said
"The poo guardian? How did you escape??" Daniel said
"It is something called keys." The poo guardian said
And then right after he tied up Daniel and Sage and knocked them out with sleeping gas....
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