《A Monster's Jaunt》Chapter 4: Doubts and Discovery

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While the others were sitting outside talking, Darkness had retreated into a place where it could recover. The tree trunk that it’d slipped into was shaded, and comfortable, with barely a sliver of a crack for light to enter. It was currently curled up at the bottom of the trunk, its entire essence surrounding the core of its being.

This was Darkness’ equivalent to its fetal position. It returned to this state whenever it felt stressed or overwhelmed, and the fight that it had just experienced was the closest to death that it had ever come.

The light had burned itself into Darkness’ very soul. Only a small part of its total body had ever left the cape to reach the bird’s wing, but even that had caused more pain than it had ever thought possible to feel. And so it lay there, bunched up in a ball, absentmindedly listening to the other three talking about humans, and the outside world.

Outside the Grove. Until a couple of hours ago, Darkness had never even been outside of its cave, and just a couple minutes ago, it had almost dissipated. Now it was thinking about going to a place that, according to the stories that Boggy had told it, was hundreds of times more dangerous. It had been silly to even contemplate.

In its heart of hearts, Darkness had always known that it was too weak. Not cut out for the world that Boggy lived in, or any of the other beings. Never mind facing humans, it couldn’t even face sunlight! Maybe it just wasn’t fate for it to find out what colors looked like, to find out the true beauty that the rest of the world beheld on a day to day basis. It curled up into a small ball even harder, squeezing its core to the point of pain.

All it wanted to do was go home, find its favorite crevice, and draw a little bit. Was all of this pain worth it? Defeatism rocked its consciousness. If Darkness had eyes, it would no doubt be bawling its eyes out. But it didn’t, so it let out a small, whimpering hiss that substituted for crying.

It didn’t know how long it was like that, but what pulled it out of that state was a familiar presence approaching it. Darkness had spent a considerable amount of time with Boggy, so it knew whenever the shapeshifter was around. It could feel the monster’s calming aura, the only thing in a sea of uncertainty. Almost instantly, Darkness started to relax, but his general despair did not leave.

“Darkness? Are you doing okay?” Boggy’s voice echoed comfortingly throughout the tree trunk.

“I don’t think I can do this, Boggy. I don’t think that I’m strong enough to survive the outer world. I just want to go home.” It whispered in its raspy voice, just loud enough to carry outside the tree. Silence drifted over the area, interrupted by the occasional squawk from the bird. One minute passed. Then two.

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Then, for the first time, Darkness heard Boggy angry. It was not a roar, or a shout. His volume was the same as it always was, but his tone was sharp. “Don’t ever call yourself weak.”

Darkness was taken aback, but replied automatically. “Of course I’m weak! I can’t even go outside without dying! What else would you call that?”

“That’s a weakness. And one that we are going to get rid of.” Boggy’s voice softened a little bit. “Do you remember how we met? It was many seasons ago, when I had finally given up as a boglet. I was never comfortable as a leaf, or a walnut, or even as a tree. I’ve always had the urge to move, and none of the other boglets understood me. Nobody would ever talk to me, not even in passing. I’d never had a single friend in my life, so I gave up. I walked into a cave and pretended to be a rock, thinking I’d live out my life where I wouldn’t have to interact with anybody ever again.

“But then I met you. You were somebody that wasn’t weirded out by me, somebody who talked to me even though I was strange. And every single day, you talked to me about how your art was imperfect, how you hated how it looked. But you never, ever quit.” Boggy paused for a second. “You can call yourself whatever you want, but you are strong, Darkness. Stronger than I ever was. And you, more than anybody else, deserve to see what color looks like.”

Darkness had never quite felt warmth before. It encompassed all that lay in the shadows, that of chill, gloom, and fear. For the first time in its life, it felt a spark in its core. Not quite a roaring fire, not even a burning ember. But it was a start.

It wasn’t entirely sure what that spark meant. That didn’t matter at the moment. All Darkness knew, in its heart of hearts, was that if Boggy was beside it, it was never in danger. After a long pause, it said, “Thank you.” Those were the most sincere words that it had ever spoken, and both of them knew it.

One final silence lay between them, this one snug and relaxed. Darkness was content to let it sit there forever, but a small problem came to its mind. With reluctance, it asked, “How am I going to get out of here? Is the cape still okay?”

“Ah.” Apparently Boggy had not thought of it. He marched off towards the bird and the fish, who seemed to be having their own conversation.

Darkness could not hear the ensuing struggle, but he could hear it. It was mostly comprised of strangled squawks, curses, and outrage. It took another full hour until Boggy returned to the tree. “Here… you go.” The small sliver of light that seeped into the trunk was covered up, and Darkness entered the small, bunched up bag that the cape formed.

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It was a little bit more claustrophobic, as the tear had been dealt with by folding the cape over on itself, but Darkness wasn’t about to complain. After all, it sounded like Boggy had gone through hell to get it.

###

Karla was not in the best of moods. Boggy and Edie had convinced her to part with her cape, but she wasn’t happy about it. Not only was it so far away from her person, it was being used to transport that… thing.

Even thinking about it sent shivers down her spine. Whatever Darkness was, it was unnatural, and she was not pleased to be in the same general vicinity as it. When it grabbed onto her in the air, her entire wing had gone numb, and feeling was only now returning to it. If Karla had encountered it on her own, she would have killed it before it killed her. And she was pretty sure that it wanted to kill her.

She ruffled her feathers in displeasure, and returned to the conversation she was having before the rude interruption. “So, what do we need to do to leave this place?” To her surprise, the fish was far more intelligent than Karla had given it credit for. It had managed to wrestle all the information from Boggy’s brain, and come up with a plan for getting out of the Grove.

Edie gave a gurgling sigh. “I’m afraid that it’ll be more difficult than I thought. If I was there, I probably could deciphered the human tongue that the witch was using, but Boggy didn’t understand it. Our best bet is to just search the area and look for anything out of the ordinary.” She hesitated, giving a look to the rest of them. “It would probably be for the best that I go study it, and come back.”

Karla huffed haughtily. “I think I’d be the better option. It would probably take you the better part of a day to get there.” She spread her wingspan with a smug look on her face. “It wouldn’t even take me an hour.”

Eyes murky with doubt, Edie stared at the Kanmi. Very slowly, she said, “It’s just that we really don’t want the witches to know what we’re doing. No offense, but I don’t exactly think you’re the stealthiest one between the two of us.”

Karla’s eyes widened in disbelief. “How dare you! I’ll have you know that I’m the stealthiest one in my family. I once stole honey from a colony of ant people.” She held her head high with pride.

It was a boast that anyone in the Wastelands would respect. The ant people, who had another, unpronounceable name, were notoriously difficult to take from. What one saw, the others saw, and at the slightest sight of a beast they would attack. Karla had camouflaged herself as a rock just outside of their hive, and sat there for a full three days without food or water. The ant people had accepted her as a part of the environment, and when they saw another Kanmi go for their hive, they left her all alone, free to swoop and claim her prize.

From the blank look she was getting, however, the gravity of the statement was lost on the fish. “It’s just that, for the entire time that I’ve known you, you have been the loudest, most obnoxious animal that I’ve ever met. And I’m including humans in that list.”

“What!? In what way could I possibly be louder than a human?”

“Well, the way I first met you was when you were screaming at the top of your lungs in midair, telling a tree to let go of your cape. Then you crashed into me, and almost drowned. You aren’t exactly the definition of subtlety.” Edie shrank back a little bit, clearly intimidated by the larger animal.

Karla wasn’t sure what she was more offended by; the insinuation that she was so short tempered that she was going to attack the fish, or the libelous statement that she lacked subtlety. She ruffled her feathers with irritation. “Okay, so I’ve been a little bit unruly for the past couple hours. I assure you that when it comes down to it, I can be more covert than a camel chameleon.”

Edie sighed, still seemingly unconvinced. “All right, I have a compromise. I’ll ride on your back and come with you. I don’t know exactly what I’m looking for, anyways, but it’ll more than likely be small and hard to spot. It’s hard to believe that the witches would let something as big as a breach in the barrier slide that easily.”

“Hmph. Well, I don’t normally let people ride on me like some sort of beast of labour, but I suppose I’ll make an exception this time.” Karla preened in embarrassment, her beak scratching against her rocky feathers. “I suppose it would be useful to have another set of eyes, even if mine are no doubt better than yours.” She cleared her throat, and flapped her wings. “Shall we take off?”

Edie had only known this insufferable bird the lesser part of a day, and she was already regretting her decision to allow her on the journey. With a mental groan, she calculated how likely she was to get eaten if she tried to ditch Karla once they left the Grove.

She did not like the odds.

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