《The Thundering Tortoise Trio》19) Taking a Stab at it.
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Rushing into Fen Ling’s inner court rooms, Fatty Li Feng skids to a stop in front of the fruit bowl - as is his wont. His ample shadow stretches out from the doorway, causing Jian Cheng, who is reading a scroll at the drawing room table nearby, to glance up with a frown.
“You make a better door than a window.” He scowls up at large dark shape.
“Naturally, a door is a noble calling, one leading to endless possibilities...” Fatty fussily selects a ripe plum from the pile. “Whereas a window is but emptiness itself...”
Fairy Fen Ling - as she is known, or truly not known at all, in the inner court - titters behind her hand.
“Don’t laugh, it only encourages him.”
“I wasn’t laughing...′ It is Fen Ling’s turn to huff. “I was snickering...”
“Or giggling at most...” Fatty dips his already wet oar back into the troubled waters and digs it in deeply.
“Same difference,” Jian Cheng snaps - they are ganging up on him again...
“Not at all. ‘Accuracy in all things’ - as you constantly tell us.”
“Hee-hee...” The little fairy is chuckling openly now.
“Now that was a laugh!” she adds brightly.
“Move, you’re in my light.” Jian Cheng says what he should have in the first place. But it is far too late.
“Sorry,” Fatty says smugly, somehow not apologising in the slightest. “I didn’t realise you owned all the sunshine - Oh, wondrous Lord of Light, should I, your humble servant, step outside to fetch some more?”
He sniffs before stepping aside. Fen Ling snigger-giggles again. This time, Jian Chen wisely ignores it, there is no win to be had here. The twosome are absolutely impossible in this mood...
The are actually supposed to be a threesome - self-dubbed The Thundering Tortoise Trio - but the three are far from unified,as every dispute inevitably becomes two against one. The third person arriving at the problem always gets to pick and choose their side... So it always becomes political roping them in... Jian Cheng hates it, so naturally the other two love it... Basically it is the beginnings of a democracy and he much prefers the brutal efficiency of a dictatorship. Although, after all these years, he is used to the constant squabbling, nothing - sadly - has changed from their Rusty Creek days.
Recently it could be said they’d settled into a comfortable routine. The boys bunk in Fen Ling’s spare room at night. First thing every morning, any evidence of their sleepover - blankets and the like - is safely stowed into the spatial belt. Later, each boy individually leaves the house - invariably headed for the free breakfast, so most days it was Fatty first out the door - wearing their messenger badge.
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In their pockets, they always carry both a receipt already signed by official inner court disciple: Fen Ling! Plus also a fresh message from her, to - never, ever in this lifetime - be registered later back at the Message Dispatch Station.
These are their trump cards and collecting them is Jian Cheng’s latest obsession. Each one is a benefit, because they can save your little life...
A few days ago, they’d even delivered their three real messages to that old dragon Elder Wei, giving them a legitimate receipt for each. Then they’d even leveraged those pieces of paper into a small payment... And a stack of spare message slips and extra receipts, so they can continue this rewarding charade indefinitely.
Acting in tandem, they’d hoodwinked the Message Dispatch Station supervisor by utilising their spatial belt. Jian Cheng had distracted the deacon by handing over his Elder Wei receipts, while Fatty simply leaned over the counter - ‘inadvertently’ bumping his belly between several piles of forms, letting the belt buckle do its magic disappearing act.
The supervisor started for a second, but when Fatty stepped back again, seemingly embarrassed by his clumsiness, his hands were both empty... As was the floor... So he shook his head and thought nothing further of it.
Fatty absolutely adores the storage belt. He’ll often visit the inner court commissary - far too often - and
suck food into the buckle to eat later.. Despite it being entirely free. He insists it tastes better after being stolen. He also claims it stays fresh the entire time. It doesn’t always stay whole though.... Fatty soon learned to eat around the nibbled bits, but he and Yama are now always at odds.
The battle of the gluttons Fen Ling calls it. Her way of washing her hands of the animosity between the two. Mostly because she adores the little rat “sooo much”. And surprisingly, the feeling is actually mutual... The irascible rodent melts like butter, turning into a little cuddle bunny around her...
These recent developments leave Jian Cheng feeling a bit constricted, like his overall benefits are somehow shrinking... In the last three weeks alone, he has effectively lost, not only his precious storage belt, but his pet as well... Why can’t he have friends with benefits?
“Alright, settle down you two, it’s time for serious sect business!” Jian Cheng picks up a blank scroll of vellum and a quill as the other two join him at the table. “I call to order our official Thundering Tortoise Sect goal-setting session.”
Li Feng rolls his eyes, but Fen Ling sits up straight taking it very seriously. She must think it’s a new game... Still, the two against one now finally favours him, so he sighs but ploughs ahead.
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“You both now know the strengths and weaknesses of our Thundering Tortoise techniques... To continue to keep our benefits for as long as possible, we need to accentuate those strengths and mask the weaknesses.
“En,” Fen Ling agrees agreeably.
Satisfied at his sole backer’s dutiful response, Jian Cheng continues. “We need to make ourselves indispensable to the sect, yet not stand out too much, or we’ll attract, not only the sect’s attention, but also a bunch of enemies seeking to suppress or control us - Hammer the nail that sticks up, as the saying goes, and we can’t afford to become that nail!”
Now Li Feng nods too - avoiding conflict is fine by him.
“So what extra skills do we have?” Jian Cheng asks. “In the outside world, we’d exploit these skills to earn money, but here the goals are firstly retaining our status as disciples then cultivation advancement by acquiring new techniques, resources such as spirit stones, herbs--”
“Ooh, Li ge-ge is good with plants and herbs!” Fen Ling enthusiastically cuts Jian Cheng off.
“Yes, I know--”
“No, I’m saying that’s a skill we can sell.” And she’s done it again.
“Thanks Fen-er, but they already have alchemists for that.” Fatty reminds her.
“Become an alchemist then, they’re really rich.”
“Hey, that’s actually not a bad idea.”
Jian Cheng has already boasted to Kong Wang about Li Feng becoming an alchemist, but had never really considered it as a real possibility. They’d have to really bend the bow, because it was such a long shot, but he scribbles a note. “What else?”
“You’re good at blacksmithing and have a minor metal thingy, there should be some money in that right?” Another Fen Ling long shot, but not a wild stab in the dark at all. It was also another boast he’d made... He duly writes it down.
“Fatty anything? Don’t die with regrets now...”
“Uh…” Put on the spot, Fatty puts his thinking cap on. “It’s just that, those times when we’ve been sparring with the others, I can’t help but notice they’re not very good... When they’re defensive they have holes all over... When they’re offensive--”
“They’re always offensive to me, ” Jian Cheng jumps instantly up on his high horse. Recently they had resumed their daily sword forms and sparring in the mornings. “They are utter rubbish the lot of them.”
Not his friends though. Fen Ling had actually improved an awful lot and initially fancied herself ... However, her ‘shock and awe’ tactics, were soon reduced to ‘no shock’ and “aww” with the wooden wasters earthing her lightning charge.
Also, Jian Cheng being a lot bulkier than Fen Ling, meant her wind push was too weak to affect him...
Furthermore, Jian Cheng had been battling his father, no-holds-barred, for two gruelling years... Every day for hours... She was on the right track though, and began only targeting his blade with her wind blows instead...
Fatty’s sword work had become a little rusty, but soon sharpened up. The big boy had been born with a huge natural talent, blessed with both length and strength... But also the Floating Clouds and Flowing Water grace that could only be admired, not taught or imitated... Even Jian Cheng is jealous.
Their constant clacking and bantering back and forth attracts a fair bit of attention though. Several inner court silkpants had insisted on taking part, but were soon dispatched despite their slightly higher tiers... It was safe to say, they hadn’t earned Jian Cheng’s respect.
“With shocking form like that, my father would slap me silly...”
He shudders at the recollection.
“And, you know what? I’d let him, and then afterwards, I’d kowtow and offer thanks.”
Somewhat sated, he pauses. “What of it?”
“Well, um, maybe you could teach them?”
“Any one of us could instruct that pathetic rabble... Including little Xiao Xiao... But it’s like big brother Wang warned, they only seem to care about chasing qi -- ”
“The elders!” Fen Ling interjects for a third time, her lively eyes sparkling. “The elders care. I’ve watched those bouts and you boys always make the elders smile and point...”
“Well, I’m glad someone appreciates proper technique...” Jian Cheng mumbles.
“No, I get what Fen-er is saying.” Now Fatty’s eyes are sparking with ideas as well. “Elders pull the purse strings... Elders allocate ranks... Forget our peers, we need to target the elders to get ahead!”
“What?That’s… True!” Aargh, how has something so obvious eluded him all this time?
“Ke-ke. Great work you two." Jian Cheng slaps his thigh. "Indeed, it seems elders literally hold all the keys to the sect... So we need ourselves one of our very own! Preferably an alchemist...”
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