Well, here we are! In front of... why does the sign say adventuring guild? Sophia, did you misunderstand me? I asked for directions to the pub, not the weird club of mercenaries who don't have any redeeming qualities and just spend their time being feral.

The pub's in the guild.

Thanks for the heads up!

I walked inside of the guild, needless to say it was a very wooden building. How do I know? Because everything, except the damn people are made out of wood. At least the dwarves and elves were fancy with their design. These guys are just fucking lazy! Seriously, this is a joke!

We didn't come here for the design, we came here for the alcohol.

Fine, fine... gits.

I made my way towards where the pub was, sitting down on a bar stool with the bartender... looking very orcish. I feel like I should say kek just to get it out of the way, but nobody would get it.

I get it...

Sophia, that's because you know everything about my world, from world war one to masturbation. I'm pretty sure kek is somewhere in between.

The orc bartender was quite big, he had some black hair which was tied up into a pony-tail and wore a white shirt, I'm not going to look if he has any trousers on.

"Huh, what are you doing here kid?" Oh, I nearly forgot that I look like a four year old at this point. I'll just use the excuse that I'm really older but am really just a midget.

"Oh, kid? Wow, so you'd expect a kid to walk into this guild unnoticed and just walk up to a bar expecting a drink? I'm just small, smartass." Frankly, all I said was true but what are the chances that this asshole is going check?

"Ah, so you're a new adventurer?" Well, there's clearly a logical explanation behind his assumption and I could keep playing him like this. However, I don't want to associate myself with adventurers.

"Nope." I responded bluntly.

"So... how'd you get here without being an adventurer? Only adventurers are allowed to lounge around in here." Fuck... I didn't know that. Could neither of you voices tell me about that?

You wouldn't listen.

She has a point, you wouldn't listen whatsoever.

"Do I have to be an adventurer to get a drink?" That is my only priority at this point.

"Yes." Well, guess I'll have to do something, I want to get some new alcohols.

"Sign me up!"

Wow, so in other words the only reason you do things now is because of alcohol?

Haven't you talked to Flare at all? How did you not realise this?

I'm going to have to agree with Ewan here... it was obvious that his entire motivation is alcohol.

"Well, ain't that great! I've got a form here for accepting new members, I'll fill it out. Tell me your name first." The orc seems very helpful, is he the receptionist as well?

"A. Wanker. The A stands for Alfred." I don't want to be an adventurer, so I'm going to fuck around with this.

Well... even if he's motivated, Ewan still is an asshole.

Well he was honest with his first name... isn't that good?

He wasn't bothered to think of a fake name.

I think it's worrisome that you know Ewan that well.

I know...

"How old are ya'?" I don't know how far to exaggerate for this one.

"I'm 95." The orc was silently judging me, after all I'm a 95 year old with the name Alfred Wanker.

"What's your specialisation?" Specialisation? Hey, thing 1 and thing 2, tell me what that is. If it's something like a class system in games then I got an answer... actually, you know what, I don't need to know actually. Fuck it.

"Not giving a fuck." I smiled, just to add that bit of contempt.

"Finally, what species are you?" Oh, this is probably see what the stat limits will be.

"Royal elf."

You were honest, I'm surprised. There's no joke? No messing around? You're just going to be direct with your species? Even if it's changed to deity, you're still being pretty honest.

Sophia, you do know that royal elves are inbred, right?

Of course! Oh...

At this point, the bartender was officially creeped out, you could see it on his face. He put the form away and gave me a drink in silence.

"Aren't you going to submit it?" I questioned him. I'm curious if I won't be an adventurer.

"I did, it was sent to the guild master. You should now be submitted as an official adventurer... if you want you can check the book over there which lists all the current adventurers within the radius of the town." He pointed to a book which was on a pedestal which was directly in front of the entrance to the place. I drank the alcohol... actually this alcohol is fucking amazing! Orc man isn't half bad at this shit!

I jumped off the stool and made my way towards the book, if it can do what I think it does, then I have a good reason to look at it. I opened it when I reached it, there was a list of all of the adventurers in the town and a majority were in the guild itself.

Sophia, this book works by magic, correct? It has a specific set of instructions where it is connected to a large database where all the adventurers are listed and if it detects any of them within the radius of which this town is then it prints them in the book, right?

Actually... wait everything you said is right. Did you actually study magic or something?

I didn't even know that existed... how the hell did you know that?

Took an educated guess. If Sophia is an index and has an index of my world and Flare was able to get to my world, then there's a good chance that Sophia has a certain radius of what she is able to know and everything in that radius she knows. She's a database for a specific area of the universe and my world is close to yours in a few light years probably. If that's true, then she is a higher version of whatever this book is with it only having knowledge of adventurers and therefore if that's the case then this is a version created by people not as strong as Gods. Therefore there's a database of adventurers and it puts them into the book.

Also, they can replace the book, right?

Ewan, you're going to steal the book, aren't you?

That's the point of the question. Also, Sophia, is there a way to connect the book to you so that it's more knowledgeable?

That's possible, but you'd have to know how to manipulate magic finely.

Got it! Okay, time to use wildfire!

Wait... the world seems a lot slower than it normally is, is this alright?

Skill Upgraded:

After repetitive use of Wildfire, the skill has grown.

Wildfire-2(10):

Bestowed upon by the Goddess of flame,

this skill allows one to reach incredible

speeds!

2-Can travel up to speeds of 12348km/h,

this also applies to the physical body of

the person.

They can do everything at such high speeds!

However it is difficult to train.

Okay, I think I'm fast enough now to just stand here and do nothing. Like seriously. That's FUCKING MACH 10! HOW DID I GET SO FAST? I'M ONLY LEVEL 2 IN IT!

If you want some information, the skill known as Wildfire is something that allows you to go as fast as light at full power.

... Oh, so in other words I can just walk out of here and nobody will give a shit since I'm too fast?

Yup! Go for it.

I just walked, everyone just appeared frozen, however if you paid extra attention you could see that everything is just going at an extremely slow pace. I had made my way towards the door, still looking around at everything, I just realised I could drink all the alcohol and get out without anyone noticing.

Hey! Look out for the-

However, because I had gotten so distracted I collided with a... wait, why does this person look like a royal elf? I thought they were rare or something. Anyways, it disrupted the wildfire and we fell outside of the building, lucky for me! I wasn't caught with the book. Her hair was green and even matched how my mother did hers... like mine, so were her eyes... I know inbreeding is kind of the thing, but is she a sister or something?

"Ah, I'm really sorry, I didn't see you there!" The elf girl just apologised clumsily and stared at me holding the book.

"Let's keep it that way..." I don't want to get caught with the book! I need to use it for a map!

Wow you are more worried about the book than the idea that you could have a potential sister to continue the royal elf tradition.

... Flare, please appear so I can hit you.

:hotinhere: Having a harem is one of the last things on my mind, but then EnablingBarley pointed out that I could just have characters be tortured by his attitude. a harem will not happen under my watch!

And really, that poll I'm going to put up there. I have included the concept of incest but I didn't think to myself to proceed with it... so... I leave it up to you.