"Oh, dear. I apologize for the landing, Mr. Quinn. My coordinates must be a few degrees off."

"Nah, it's alright."

I smile for the clerk's benefit and force myself upright. We materialized in midair, and for whatever reason, I dropped like a boulder instead of mimicking her elegant downwards float. I cough up the mouthful of dirt I inhaled upon landing and brush off my clothes.

"Moving along, then!" The clerk claps her hands and skips back on nimble toes. She flings her arms wide and spins around, showing off our surroundings. "Welcome to the practice chamber!"

I rub a fresh kink from my neck and make a doubtful sound. Shouldn't a chamber have walls? So far as I can tell, we've landed in the middle of literal nowhere. Above and around us stretches a stark white void. If not for the packed dirt beneath our feet, I'd figure we were still floating.

"It's... spacious." A single bead of sweat slides down my temple. "So, I'm practicing the trial here? What am I practicing with? Will it, uh, be as hard as the real deal?"

"So many questions~ I appreciate your enthusiasm, Mr. Quinn." The clerk snaps her fingers. Above her, a small interface window expands into view. "We here at the 1st Class Trial Dungeon take your success very seriously. While you can't reherase fights with real monsters in this room, you can practice your basic movement and combat controls."

The clerk raises her index finger and makes a turning motion with her wrist. The interface window follows her direction and drifts down to eye level.

... My eye level, that is. The dungeon staff's female uniforms involve heels, giving the clerk several inches' advantage over my already short self. Honestly, why didn't I come with a handsome, mature-looking model instead of this adolescent body? I curse the RNG every day.

The window flickers, calling my attention. The word 'LOADING' surfaces and begins to scroll.

"So, Mr. Quinn. Do you have any prior combat experience?"

"Ah... not really."

"What about summoning or support roles?"

"Sorry, no."

"Are you familiar at all with [Crafting]?"

The clerk's head tilts in genuine curiosity. I heave a strained, drawn-out sigh.

"I used to work the Choboja Village gate," I murmur, too embarrassed to meet her eyes. "I spent my whole life begging Heroes to beat up 「Slimes」for me."

An awkward silence passes between us. The clerk bobs a thoughtful nod.

"O~oh. So you were that guy."

Those patronizing words pass her lips in such a sweet tone that I find myself nodding. When the realization hits, I snap to attention.

"What's that supposed to mean!?"

"Don't cry, Mr. Quinn~" She waves me off. "There's not much time, so let's get you up to speed. May I see your [Character] screen and [Skill Tree]?"

"Huh? Oh, sure, but fair warning--they're not much to look at."

Smiling sheepishly, I summon both windows and slide them in front of her.

"Thank you kindly."

The clerk taps her chin, considering the various numbers, icons, and sliders filling the screens. How well am I doing compared to the other newbies she's met? I shift uneasily at the thought of disappointing someone with my randomizer-given build. The confidence I mustered earlier begins to waver.

Don't blame me for my abysmal stats!

"Aha," says the clerk, pulling me from my thoughts. "It's just as I suspected. Most NPCs of mundane origins have no [Skills] and poor [Attributes] across the board. You're no exception. In fact, your numbers are stunningly common."

Common, huh? I sink into a fog of despair, speared through the heart by her frank observations.

"That's fine," she continues, oblivious to my wounded pride. "For the purpose of today's trial, I, Valeria Fullbright, will fix that for you. Pick your stress ball, Mr. Quinn ♥"

Valeria brings her own window back into the foreground with a swish of her hand. The 'loading' text has been replaced by a simple dropdown menu with the following header:

CHOOSE A TRAINING DUMMY

"Hmm..."

I lift a curious hand and tap the box. To my surprise, an entire bestiary's worth of monster names unfolds beneath. Goblins, sea serpents, giant spiders... if I really wanted to, I could even try my hand at beating up fake dragons.

"It's a little intimidating," I admit. "What do you suggest?"

Valeria Fullbright simply winks.

"How about some 「Slimes」?"