When was it that the world lost color? That I started wearing a mask? That my heart was devoid of all feelings? That even pain began to dull?

All I know is I made a mistake and I paid for it. As my blood pours out onto the pavement, I hear people screaming around me, calling for help. If I get whisked away to another world, if I get a second chance at life, I hope I can change myself. I wasn’t able to in this lifetime, but maybe it would have helped, maybe I wouldn’t have devolved so much, if I did something I’m actually good at.

Please God, if you are there, give me a chance to change…

…

…

I wake up staring at a familiar face. It’s a lady, an extremely gorgeous lady with soft red eyes and pink hair. The walls and ceiling are a bright white color. If this is heaven I am undeserving. She says something I can’t understand, smiles as her eyes water, then looks away toward a man with silver hair and golden eyes.

Another woman in a nurse’s gown comes into view. A beeping noise in the background becomes clear and I feel something pinching my index finger. I raise my arm and see a little kid’s hand, and then my head begins to hurt badly. Wincing, I bring my hand to my head and pass out again.

…

…

When I wake next, my vision is much clearer and I’m in a different room. The bed is much softer and the blankets are heavier. I hear the door somewhere open and attempt to get up, but as I struggle, the lady from before rushes to my side and helps to sit me up against the many pillows behind me.

“Rest, Nova. The doctors said that your condition has just stabilized and that you shouldn’t push yourself.” Her low and mellow voice flows beautifully, more so than any voice I’ve ever heard. “You have no idea how frightened your father and I were when you went missing, and then when we found you later, cold as ice.”

That’s right. I, a five-year-old little girl, was kidnapped by a man who left me in a cold cellar for days. This lady is my mother and that silver-haired man is my father. I remembered my past life while I was passed out, and it seems I’ve become the villainess of a fantasy-romance novel I read in my previous life…

After this incident, I would have become cold-hearted and more reserved towards non-family members, and all I would do is laze around…

While in my last years of my school life, the protagonist views me as a bully and as a result, my social life is murdered. Eventually, under the guise of harming the country’s future queen, I am stripped of my name and banished from the kingdom.

I know one of my possible futures.

Then if I avoid that future altogether, I don’t have to worry, right?

As I think this, I look towards my mother. “Mama?”

“Yes, my baby?” She smiles brightly at me.

“A scary man kidnapped me. Did you find him?”

Her face scrunches in thought. “When we found you, you were alone.”

“You have to catch that man so no one else gets hurt.”

She nods. “Okay. Tell me what he looks like.”

There was some sort of spell that allows you to recreate a memory into a viewing gem, similar to the spell the protagonist used to fabricate a memory to frame me. It was something like… . I whisper the word and hold out my hand, palm face up. Little swirls of golden light appear and circle into a spherical form. A few moments later, sitting in my palm is a gem the size of a small marble.

Hands clutch my body suddenly and I nearly drop the gem out of fright. I look up to my mother’s shining eyes. “Nova! When did you learn to use magic like that?”

“I… uh…” I avert my eyes and lift the marble to her sight. “The man looked like this.”

She searches my eyes for a moment longer before letting go of me and taking the marble from my hand and pocketing it. “My baby is a genius,” she murmurs. “I will give this to your father and let him decide what to do.”

“Okay.”

“On that note, tell me honestly,” she says in her serious tone. “Where did you learn to use magic?”

“I… um… I don’t know? I read some books.”

“You taught yourself?”

Shrugging, I smile nervously.

My mother sighs and takes my hands in hers. “While I fully support your learning, don’t do something without a teacher. It’s dangerous to experiment on your own.”

I nod and clutch her hands. “Okay.”

She nods back at me, and then her expression lights up again. “But to think that my baby would be such a genius, to learn something from a book and be able to apply it directly, and in magic at that, not to mention at such a young and tender age! I must be the most blessed person on the planet!”

“Mama, does this mean I’m talented?” I don’t remember ever dabbling in magic. Noble ladies rarely ever go into the field.

“To say you're talented is an extreme understatement! You are one of at least one million people to have such a high understanding of magic.”

“Really? Then can I go into magic?”

Pausing, she draws her hands back. Lines of worry are etched on her face. “If that is what you truly wish, then I will fully support you. But do you not want to go to the Royal Academy like most higher nobles? You’ve already been accepted, after the school saw your aptitude for learning, and you have to expand your social circles if you wish to have friends that you can count on.”

I take a deep breath. “I don’t want to be a scholar. I want to be a great sage. I don’t care about friends either. All I need is you and Papa.”

She holds her hand to her face and sighs. "While that's really cute, you still need to have friends in the world."

"Then I'll make friends at the magic school. But they're not ever going to be as important as you and Papa."