Any trace of Mister Lye seemed completely lost in the frenzy of rage. The Mad Scientist stabbed out with the massive needle in his hand, the blue liquid glistening on the tip.

Robin lashed the former-anytool machete upwards and back, waving it wildly and warding the larger man off. The Mad Scientist hopped backwards quickly, his glaring eyes darting over Robin.

In the brief video interview Robin had with the man, Mister Lye had seemed like “he carried with him a great appreciation for all things material” (as his father had phrased it, having watched the interview from the corner of the room. He had been perfectly manicured and groomed, his skin immaculate. The room Mister Lye had been sitting in was bare of decorations, but in the sense of a wealthy minimalist’s house.

Unfortunately for Robin, who had to look at him, the attention Mister… the Mad Scientist had shown to his grooming allowed the sheer physical viscosity of his sudden rage to show all too clearly. The veins in his forehead were angry, pulsing worms, tense enough that Robin kept expecting them to break through the skin.

Is that his weak spot...? Oh yoshi. Please! No! I can’t! Robin saw the small blade sinking into the skull of the man, his own snarling face a reflection of the primal emotion shown by the Mad Scientist, and he felt nauseous.

The Mad Scientist stepped backwards, reaching into the pocket of his lab coat and withdrawing a small glass vial. He pulled the stopper off and poured the vial on the ground carefully, his arm extended fully away from him. When he had emptied the vial, he replaced the stopper and put it into his pocket as he stepped backwards.

Robin stared, his jaw hanging slightly open. I thought I would have a SPEED advantage! Is that what higher SPEED does!? The Mad Scientist had done everything with a stunning fluidity, flowing from one step to the next and hopping backwards. It had all looked normal, or rather, at least physically possible. It just also looked like he had practiced those exact steps and movements every day of his entire life, and had downed repeated shots of adderall with one of those banned Russian energy drinks, all on an empty stomach.

No one would look at him moving like that and think “normal”, they would think he was on PCP! Agh! Oh.

Robin was startled by the appearance of a translucent box in the corner of his field of vision. New notification? Why now? What happened? Was it the thing he poured out? Robin felt a cold spike of dread worm into his stomach. His recent modification to the appearance of the notifications made it a little bit easier and safer to read them, but this one made him apprehensive.

Robin read it quickly, growing angrier at the Mad Scientist with every word. When he read the first number, he clenched his jaw hard enough that his teeth hurt, desperately containing his explosive loathing from showing on his face.

You piece of human fucking garbage!

*****

The Brilliant Inventor saw the LYING THIEF staring at him in glass-eyed awe. He sheathed his rage instantly; if this LYING THIEF was standing against HIM, but could also see his greatness and be humbled by (naturally), he might be a LEARNED PEER! That would be a treat, although it would be unlikely such a fellow would approach this location, isolated both physically and legally, without an intent to pursue unscrupulous activities. I trust no one, not even myself, the Brilliant Inventor thought. Who was it who said that again? Ah well. Surely lesser than myself and thus irrelevant in the long term schematic.

“HAH! I see that you are astounded by my SPEED, are you not? The awe shows clearly on your face.”

The THIEVING PEER nodded after a moment, slow to recover. The Brilliant Inventor rolled his eyes. (Mentally, of course - such discourse while amidst the discussion of proper academic topics of the day would be churlish, and he mustn’t sink to their level.) He smiled at the MISBEHAVING PRODIGY, and chose the most gentle punishment he could muster.

“You were spoken to, Robin.” There. The Brilliant Inventor spoke his given name casually, before introductions had been properly made (at least in their current duties!). How boorish, to broach a topic and then leaving a man to flounder conversationally. Let the acts of a boor reap boorish actions in return.

The boy narrowed his dark brown eyes. Pity they weren’t lighter, laboratory conditions often had poor lighting.

His eyes would rot very quickly.

“You are very fast, faster than any person I’ve ever seen. Are you a super...human?”

The Brilliant Inventor laughed out loud, his rapid, high-pitched guffaws startling the IGNORANT PEER. The boy clad in a shredded and bloodied lab coat was tense. Bullied, no doubt. He will become a good Assistant, given the proper nurture.

“My Laboratory gives me certain bonuses, as I am sure you have predicted. While within my demesne, if you will, I am as fast as any human could ever be. My SPEED stat is at the maximum. That amount is five. Write that down, as it may be some time before you reach that yourself.” Was that clear enough enunciation? Should I speak slower for him? He possessed a mastery of English, did he not? Yes.

The Brilliant Inventor smiled generously at the HUMBLED STUDENT. There was no need for further violence, so he may as well inoculate the lad and allow him to become a Laboratory Assistant. He reached into his pocket to grab it, but… Ah, yes. There was that.

The self-dispersion venom.

Unfortunate. He sighed. Good help was truly becoming hard to find.

The Brilliant Inventor turned to the UNPAID VOLUNTEER and gestured to the puddle of translucent grey liquid that he had splashed on the ground.

“This is a venom extracted from one of my specimens on the first floor. Do you see how it is shrinking? The puddle, child, the puddle.” He gestured and waited politely.

The WALKING DEAD nodded after a brief glance at the floor. “I do see it. It’s… It is aerosolizing, right? How is it doing that? Did you develop that yourself?”

“I am most impressed! I did. It was an early attempt, and only slowly fills the air. The toxin has to build up slowly, you see. My later versions are much more potent.”

They both smiled politely.

The Brilliant Inventor began to grow wary when the puddle had completely dissipated and the UNIQUE SPECIMEN was still standing. Perhaps this child may be worth dissecting for information, after all.

As loathe as he was to do so, perhaps it was time to euthanize this specimen. The Brilliant Inventor clapped twice and called for the Lab Assistants to come and prepare it.

“Ethan, Velas, please come in; I have a specimen to prepare.”

The UNPREPARED SPECIMEN leapt backwards like a rat avoiding the poke, seeming startled. He lifted the odd-looking blade-on-a-stick he carried at his side in front of him, as if to hold back the Lab Assistants.

His Lab Assistants entered the room in the normal way, standing up fully within five seconds. The specimen looked like it was going to be nauseous. “What are…. What did you do!?”

Ethan lunged at the boy, his arms moving to wrap around him in a bearhug. The boy screamed out loud and stabbed Ethan in the chest!

It was not going to have a substantial effect on Ethan’s upgraded flesh, but the sheer affront of it!

Velas moved in to wrap the boy in a hug from the other side, taking advantage of the struggle between his fellow lab assistant and his quarry to move unimpeded. He lunged at them, wrapping his…

A massive Orchid Mantis snatched Velas off of the ground as he lunged, yanking him towards the ceiling. Small bits of him began raining down. The entire process was pleasantly silent, the room still filled with the shouts of the struggling specimen. How fascinating. If it should remain hungry after finishing the first meal, perhaps watching it consume the specimen could yield interesting results. It was not ideal, however. Dissection offered so much more room to grow, and with the advent of healing potions, there was no need to arrange for a supply of research subjects.

“Stop! Think of the advancements to the fields of YSARI SYSTEM SCIENCE with your dissection and study! I could advance the field by years, if not decades! This needs to happen!”

The FRIGHTENED RODENT yelled something almost incoherent, “SIL….IPE!”, causing Ethan to shudder, as if he had been struck by a hammer. The student was winning the grapple, as he had abruptly changed his tactics and begun trying to wrap the Lab Assistant in a hug of his own. The Brilliant Inventor frowned. This was not proper laboratory procedure.

As he opened his mouth to order the FERAL RAT to cease and submit to the proper authority, I.E. himself, the BACKWOODS HICK screamed wildly, suddenly lifting his legs off the ground and putting his entire weight on Ethan’s neck, his arms wrapped tightly.

What surprised the Brilliant Inventor, though, was that Ethan seemed to catch on something as he fell down.

What shocked the Brilliant Inventor was the Ethan suddenly fell into two pieces, the nullthermic metafluid destabilizing as it came into contact with the air, filling the room with a smell similar to what carbonated vinegar might taste like.

“Ethan! You MONSTROUS COWARD! How could you!? Ethan took too many supplies to replace just like that…!”

The MURDERING PHILISTINE glared with beady brown rodent eyes at the Brilliant Inventor and said something in his street-punk voice that froze the Brilliant Inventor in his tracks.

“You tried to kill me with your venom and it’s not going to work so if you’re hoping for that don’t hold your breath.” Ironically, the boy panted slightly after spitting his words out at great speed.

“In fact, I just got a lot of points for defeating ‘Ethan’, so it’s going to be harder, now.”

“Also…”

The Brilliant Inventor waited impatiently. His Laboratory Assistants had been better conversationalists.

“I saw what ...Ethan… was when he died. He’s not human anymore, and if you’re what did that to him, you probably aren’t, either.”

The Brilliant Inventor laughed loudly, his humor ringing uncomfortably true in the stone room.

“Of course I am human! Look at me, you ignorant little wretch! Do you see an exoskeleton on me, hmmm? I did not think so. Do not judge your betters on matters which you do not understand. Ethan chose this for himself. He agreed to become a Laboratory Assistant; my first, in fact!”

The BLIND FOOL shook his filthy rat-hair. “No, he didn’t choose this. He had no idea what becoming your Laboratory Assistant entailed, did he?”

“He knew the risks of being on the frontiers of medical pioneering!”

The Brilliant Inventor was growing irate, though how this FEEBLEMINDED TWIT was managing to affect his emotions, he could not say. Perhaps he was more afflicted by the death of Ethan than he suspected; he would, after all, be short-handed for all of the currently-extant experiments running… I should place an Advert for help/.

No man is his own best doctor!, he thought to himself seriously, completely missing the irony as he pulled out a small pill and another small vial, which he quickly uncorked, dropping the pill inside. He replaced the cork and shook the rapidly-dissolving pill into the liquid of the vial like he wanted to shake the neck of the ASSISTANT KILLER.

The remains of the Brilliant Inventor’s favorite Lab Assistant … Ethan? finally pried off of his neck and from around his arms, the specimen stepped toward the Brilliant Inventor, who promptly uncorked his bottle and drank it in one gulp. Something caught his eye as he meticulously replaced the re-corked vial into his pocket.

The WEAK SPECIMEN was crying. Perhaps he would not have been a useful topic for study, after all.

“Ah, well. If this is the path you wish to pursue, never let it be said that I, the Brilliant Inventor, refused to aid the youth in their pursuits of knowledge and excellence!”

As he was speaking, the Brilliant Inventor reached behind himself and pulled a small metal circlet from where it sat atop a mannequin head. Several wires dangled behind it, attached to what appeared to be a gigantic lump of pure solder the size of a lemon. He placed it delicately on his head, and then placed the lump of dangling metal into his shirt pocket, shrugging as Robin stared, tears streaming down his face.

“Are you st… Is that a… Are you still trying to kill me?”

“Of course not!” The Brilliant Inventor focused his thoughts on the circlet, and felt a small surge of heat go through his body as the band tightened, burning into his scalp. Note to self: the pain caused by the device was nearly as great as reported by [Former] Laboratory Assistant.

“Scientists euthanize, not kill.”

The Brilliant Inventor hefted the focus wand from the table, a massive rod with one end covered in a series of small spikes, each with a small glass orb on the end. He balanced it carefully on his stomach and tucked the lump of metal from the headband into the tip of it. When it was secure, he hefted it with both hands and aimed it at the RAW MEAT.

The boy just stood there defeated, watching. His arms were hanging listlessly at his sides.

The Brilliant Inventor moved his thumb towards the pulsing trigger-crystal. Just before his thumb touched it, the boy mumbled something too quietly to be heard. He shrugged his shoulders and triggered the crystal, vaporizing the boy on the spot in a burst of crackling topaz electricity.

Nothing happened. The Brilliant Inventor calmly asked the MISCHIEVOUS SCAMP what he had done. The boy flinched and raised his pathetic weapon, the tears streaming down his face.

The Brilliant Inventor triggered the weapon again, and the boy disintegrated where he stood.

Except he didn’t. But he should. He has to. The weapon has been tested. The weapon has been tested. It works. It should work now. It does work. He lifted the weapon and reduced the boy to atoms, ignoring the sharp blow to the side that came immediately after.

The boy ripped the blade out and hit him again. The Brilliant Inventor triggered the crystal and disintegrated him again. He reduced the boy to nothing even as a small, almost hand-sickle shaped blade cut into his arm. He put on his best “Head Scientist” voice and told the child he was inconsistent and objectively dead, but the INCONSISTENT MULE stuck him again, the blade sinking at an inward angle down into his torso through the space between his shoulder and collar bones. He disintegrated the child.

No, his thumb wouldn’t move… He focused, ignoring the pain that should not exist, and triggered the crystal, blowing a crackling hole in the chest of the LOOMING CHILD.

The child’s tears were dripping on his face, hot and shameful. He was asking a question.

Ah, he was an OVEREAGER STUDENT! The dead cannot answer questions, child. You should have braved it before you died!

The room was dark, but the child’s tears kept falling, dripping, burning, so the Brilliant Inventor disintegrated him until his thoughts turned still.

*****

Even then, he felt the tears falling.