1

“You know what? I’m gonna say it” said Aries. “You’ve had a lot of crazy ideas, but this one takes the cake.”

She was right, of course – which made it all the better. Alex didn’t mind one bit. As long as he was concerned, he was in heaven. It was Friday night, he had enough money for takeout, the whole gang was online, and they were about to attempt to raid an epic-level dungeon all by themselves. Twenty-four hours later, when he’d be sitting in a jail cell watching roaches climb the walls, this would be the feeling he’d savor the most.

Alex quaffed a Potion of Rejuvenation to top off his health bar, checked his cooldowns, and assumed his position by the gate. This was their fifth attempt at the Attack on Greystone Keep final quest, and everybody had their game face on. All they had to do was make it through this wave without losing any party members. If they managed that, the boss that followed would be smooth sailing. That, of course, was easier said than done. They’d finetuned their strategy a thousand times, but it still felt like they were missing something.

“Incoming!” came Packman’s warning, and they were on again.

Aries let fly a Fireball at the first line of charging raiders, blasting a good handful of them to kingdom come and setting another dozen or so aflame. The sheer panache with which she played her Pyromancer was something to behold. Not that it made much of a difference. Compared to the oncoming horde, this vanguard was just a drop in the bucket.

Packman used Bolstering Cry to give the rest of the group some much-needed oomph, then activated his Shield Wall and got out there to meet the raiders face to face. He was the group’s tank, and the only thing that stood between them and a total party kill.

Bass stood in the back and summoned his Soothing Spirit, already preparing to patch up anybody who got too low on health. He wasn’t much of a talker, their resident Cleric. When it came to pulling his ass out of the fire, though, Alex would take no other healer over him. Bass was alright.

Rona held the left flank. She was the group’s Assassin, and the key to this particular strategy they were about to use. Alex could hear her whisper to herself over the commlink, trying to memorize the skill sequence of the new Area-of-Effect skill rotation she was trying out. She had just respecced to a Bleed build, and she had to play her part perfectly, if they were to finally manage and get to the boss in one piece.

As for Alex himself, he brought up the other end of the line. He was a kind of a wildcard, both as a player and as a raid party member. He didn’t have Packman’s eye for tactics, or Aries’s head for numbers, or even Bass’s zen-like calm. What he did have was a gift for improvisation, a +3 Black Knight Greatsword, and full intent to stick it to the raiders where the sun didn’t shine.

As the first Fireball-scorched raider got close enough for Packman to slam him with his shield, Alex had already downed two and was about to cut a third in half. Slash-Slash-Cleave. Pop went the raider, dropping a tidy little pile of loot. Picking it up, of course, was out of the question for the moment–Alex didn’t have a single second to spare. Two raiders rushed to take the place of their fallen comrade, and hundreds more were coming.

Slash-Slash-Cleave. Critical Hit!

“Nice one, Alex!” said Rona, herself already knee-deep in raider remains, a blood-red nimbus wafting from her enchanted daggers in waves.

“Keep it up, people!” Packman piped in over the commlink. “At this rate, we may even have a chance to –”

Whatever Packman said next, Alex didn’t hear. Someone–a very heavy-handed someone–started shouting and pounding at his appartment door, startling him so bad he almost dropped his gamepad.

“Alexander Rulin!” roared a man on the other side of the door. “Police! Open Up!”

Fuck.

Fuck.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

“Uh… guys?” said Alex, numb. “I think I’m screwed.”