Phil was stretched out on the couch in the living room a couple hours after they returned from the guild, watching TV. Rachel and Tina had left shortly after they’d returned to begin packing up their apartments to move into the house. They’d initially begged off the offer for their own rooms, but Reese had insisted on the grounds that it helped with party bonding, and Britt told them that they’d have to begin their training if they wished to help out on quests. When they still hesitated, Reese also reminded them that they’d be living under the same roof as Phil. They couldn’t call a cab fast enough.

Shortly after they’d left, Rose had approached Phil. She pointed out that there were only two unused bedrooms left. One was currently set up as another guest room like his had been. The other was the master bedroom. Bruce’s old room. Before Phil could even say anything, Rose told him that she wanted him to have it. He’d stared at her, unable to think of what to say. She gave him a small smile and said she wasn’t completely over everything yet, and that she’d still continue to see the counselor Reese had introduced her to, but she’d had a chance to say goodbye to Bruce now, and it was time to take that step. She was going to clean Bruce’s stuff out of the room, and he should be able to move in the next day. She’d then turned and walked upstairs. Phil hadn’t been able to say a word the whole time. Britt had come up behind him, kissed his cheek, and said she was going to help Rose. Then she reminded him that it was Reese’s day and that he should spend time with her.

Reese, however, had told him to go relax, there was something she had to do. So, here he was, dozing on the couch while some mindless sitcom played on the television. He hadn’t realized he’d dozed off until he felt a heavy impact and he jerked awake with an OOF. Taking a second to catch his bearings and realize he wasn’t dead or dying, he focused on what had woken him up so forcefully.

Blonde hair, blue eyes, and a dazzling smile greeted him.

“Oh good! You’re awake,” Reese beamed at him. She was stretched out on top of him, her toes bouncing on his shins as she positively vibrated with excitement. “Get up!”

“Wha… what?” he said.

She rolled off of him and the couch and danced around between him and TV. Her blue sundress lifted as she twirled, showing off a lot of leg before she came to a stop next to the couch again. She bent over at the waist, intentionally giving Phil a view of her cleavage as she brought her face to his. “Get up!” she said again, kissing him quickly.

“Get up!” Kiss.

“Get up!” Kiss.

“Get up!” Kiss.

As much as Phil enjoyed the attention, he was worried her bobbing up and down like that would eventually lead to a headbutt, so after her last kiss he grabbed her shoulders, spun her around, and pulled her on to the couch with him, wedging her between himself and the back of the couch, containing her manic energy briefly.

“Noooo!” she mock pouted. “You’re supposed to get up, not pull me down.” He smiled and draped an arm over her waist. After giving her a peck on the nose, he asked what was going on.

“You’re taking me on a date,” she said in a singsong voice. “It’s my night and I want a date. Take me to a fancy restaurant and spoil me rotten. Take me to McDonald’s so I can steal your fries. Take me to see a movie so we can make-out in the dark like teenagers. I don’t care where we go. Just take me somewhere so the world knows you’re mine.”

“Oh?” he said, running his hand up and down her waist. “I rather feel like I should be the one showing you off.”

“Okay, then we can show each other off. So, take me out and flaunt me.”

He sighed. “The only problem is that I have no idea where to go. I was a hermit, remember? Work and home except when I was dragged out by Chuck, and we only ever went to the bar we went to last night. I’m actually pretty clueless about what there is to do in this town. Is there anywhere you’d like to go?”

She shook her head. “Nowhere in particular. As long as it’s with you.”

He chuckled. “Is this going to be one of those relationships where I ask you where you want to eat, you tell me you don’t care, then deny all of my suggestions until I finally worm an actual answer out of you?”

An innocent smile played across her lips as she looked off to the side. “Dunno. Maybe?”

“Well, as I just said, I don’t know any places to list off. If it’s not delivery pizza or Chinese food, I’ve got nothing.”

She suddenly pushed him on to his back and straddled his waist, her eyes fairly glowing with excitement. “Pizza!? I love pizza! I know just the place. Throw on your shoes and let’s go!” She fairly bounced on top of him in her eagerness.

“If you keep bouncing on me like that the pizza will have to wait, babe.”

She stopped and looked down, realizing what she was doing to him. “Oops. Sorry.” She giggled, then got off of him. “You good to go, or should I give you couple minutes?”

“I’m good to go,” he said, getting up. “It was a near thing though. Come on, I’ll get the keys and you can show me where we’re going.”

*

“How fucking stupid can you girls be!?”

Chuck slapped his phone on the table, keeping his voice low so no one could hear them in the restaurant they were eating at. On the phone was a headline describing the discovery of two men killed in a mysterious but similar manner across town from each other. The two women sitting across from him glanced at the phone and shrugged, not caring in the slightest.

“So a couple fucks died with smiles on their faces. What’s the big deal?” one of the women said.

“The big deal, Felicity, is that now they know there’s more than one of you humping your way through the male population here!” Chuck stabbed at a piece of his steak in frustration at chewed on it angrily. This deal with their little group was proving to be more trouble than it was worth, even if the sex was amazing.

Ever since he’d hooked up with that waitress at his old favorite hunting ground, it had been harder for him to prowl the local bars and clubs for women. Apparently, bar staff liked to gossip amongst themselves, and word had spread that he’d taken a bouncer’s wife. He didn’t see what the big deal was. People fucked around all the time, but apparently that dumb sack of muscle was well liked in the nightlife community, and Chuck had been harassed or chased out of nearly every popular bar in the city. Then the big bastard had attacked him when Chuck had tried to go back, forcing him to lay low. He didn’t even remember the bitch’s name. He’d gotten his taste and moved on. At least, that’s what he told himself. Tina, he sneered in his head.

If he’d known he’d lose his wimpy little generator the next day, he probably would’ve been more careful. Who figured that Phil, of all people, would end up as a party leader in the guild? After that orc bitch had taken him, their connection had been broken and Chuck had been forced to get his fill the old fashioned way. Unfortunately, not being allowed near the nightlife really hampered his efforts. People were less likely question their fuzzy memories about hooking up with someone after a night at the bar than they were any other time.

Enter these stupid bitches. He’d met the two on accident as he was scoping out the one of the lesser known college bars. It wasn’t as popular and had just opened up, so he was hoping his reputation hadn’t preceded him like it had everywhere else. The place was pretty dead that night, but he’d found two beautiful women sitting by themselves at a table. Eager to be the meat in a co-ed sandwich, he’d planted himself in the remaining seat and introduced himself, attempting to hit them with his charm. Chuck soon learned that one couldn’t seduce a seducer, as his charm had no effect on the women. After the three of them had gotten over the shock, they’d spent the evening discussing their histories and problems they were currently facing. Chuck still got his co-ed sandwich that night, just not as much power as he’d wanted.

The problem that the girls had was that it was getting harder for them to cover for their acts. It was only a matter of time before the guild tracked one of them down. That’s when they made a deal. Taking into consideration Chuck’s run of bad luck with finding women, they agreed to let him feed on them as long as he provided a place for them to lay low for a while and had an alibi for their whereabouts. Chuck was about to suggest they just stop killing their marks, but then decided against it. As long as they were stupid enough to keep killing men, they would need him, and as long as they needed him, he got to keep fucking them. That gave him the double bonus of being with two women at once and being able to feed off of them. It was a mutually beneficial situation, so naturally the stupid sluts were doing their best to fuck it all up.

“Really, Charlie, you need to lighten up some. We were both hungry last night. You certainly didn’t object to the double servings you got later on. In fact, you were so happy and energetic you almost satisfied me,” the gorgeous 22 year old said as she twirled her dirty blonde hair around her finger. Felicity wasn’t one to worry about the big picture. All she cared about was running track and hunting dick. Everything else was just details.

“It’s Chuck,” he gritted out, hating the name she used. “And what about you, Lily? This whole thing was your idea. I figured you’d be smart enough to avoid something like this? As long as they thought there was only one of you, covering for you wouldn’t have been a problem.”

The black woman shrugged. “Tell anyone who asks that you were fucking both of us at the time. It’s not like they can prove you weren’t.” The swimmer tossed back her beer, then levelled her brown eyes at him. “What about your issue? Find that little fuck yet? The one that can identify you to the guild? Seems to me that’s the bigger problem here. No one but you knows our faces, but he knows yours. You might want to focus on that before you start lecturing us on critically stupid mistakes, because honey, you’ve got a whopper hanging over your head.”

Chuck’s mouth snapped shut and he was barely able to contain his sneer. “No,” he admitted in frustration. “I haven’t been able to find a trace of him in four months. His apartment was even cleaned out the day I tried to kill him before he could talk. Doubtless the guild knows about me, but you know them. They won’t go to the cops to find anyone who isn’t a mundane. How does someone just disappear like that? He’s clueless about the world, I made sure of it. Turned him into a loner and only dragged him out when I was bored.”

Lily sat back and waved for the waiter to get another beer. “He’s had four months to learn, and he’s got the guild’s help probably. The longer you wait, the harder it’s going to be. Take care of him and half our problems are gone.” She leaned forward and smiled. “Hell, just drop him off with me and I’ll have him eagerly crawling to his death.”

“Don’t forget that orc bitch. She looked tough. You may have Amazon mixed into that succubus, but I don’t think you could take her.”

Lily snorted. “Watch me. Orcs are just muscleheads. All brawn. We Amazons know a thing or two about skinning an orc.” Her eyes flicked to the window they were sitting next to and narrowed as she found a target. “Hello, sweet thing. I think I found my desert tonight. You want a helping, Fel?”

The other girl looked up from her phone to see what Lily was talking about. “Oh. He does look delicious, doesn’t he? How about we take him, and Charlie here can have the pretty blonde that’s with him?”

Chuck growled at the use of that name again but turned to see who they were talking about. The food he was chewing fell out of his mouth as his jaw dropped. The man was standing taller than he remembered and had packed on some muscle, but that profile was undeniably Phil. So many months he’d been searching, and the fucker just walked on by, happy as could be, and with a gorgeous woman on his arm to boot! Here he was, stressing out about everything and having to get fed secondhand by these bitches, and he was out fucking off with some hottie? How the fuck was that fair?

“Ladies,” he said after watching where the couple went, “who’s in the mood for pizza?”

*

Phil sat back and patted his belly. “You were right. This place was amazing.”

Reese beamed at him around the pizza she was currently devouring. Since her mouth was full, she gave him a thumbs up and nodded her head eagerly. He laughed, taking another drink of his soda.

“How’d you discover this place?”

She held up a finger as she swallowed, took a drink to wash it down, then she was ready to speak. “Used to come here all the time when I was in college. I’m glad it’s still around. It’s been a few years since I was last in this part of town.” She looked around and soaked in the nostalgia. “I used to drag Rose and Britt here when we weren’t in class or on a quest.”

“You guys have been together a long time, haven’t you?” Phil also looked around and realized they were probably the oldest people here outside of the staff. The place was full of college aged kids, and he suddenly felt ancient, which wasn’t something he typically did at 28.

“Since right out of high school, pretty much,” she nodded. She took another sip of her soda, casually looking around, making sure to see over his shoulder. She smirked. “Those two girls are still stealing glances at you. That’s my mission accomplished for the night.”

“Your mission, huh?”

“Yeah! I said I wanted to show you off, remember? Now there are two women who seem desperate to be sitting where I am. They’re pretty too. If I was into it like Britt is, I’d invite them over.”

Phil choked on his drink, causing her to laugh. “I said if I was. Don’t get your hopes up, hero. You’re mine and mine alone tonight.” Her face darkened a little. “Although I don’t think-”

He cut her off my grabbing her hand. “Hey, I’m in no rush, Reese. Don’t feel bad. Ok? I’m happy enough just being near you.”

“But I really want to show you just how much I love you.”

“You do that just fine right now. We’ve got the rest of our lives, right? There’s no hurry.”

Smiling, she gripped his hand back. “And it’s not like you don’t have three other women ready to be stuffed and mounted by you, right?

“Three? I wasn’t aware you two had allowed Rachel and Tina into the fold already.”

“Are you saying that’s our decision to make?” she asked, somewhat surprised.

“Uh, yeah? Did you think I’d really be selfish enough to start collecting women like that? I’m still getting used to the idea of having two girlfriends. I mean, it’s only been a couple days. Now you’re talking like I have four. Remember, we just met Rachel last night, and I’ve only known Tina casually from the bar. As far as I’m concerned, last night was an anomaly.”

Reese sighed. “You really are a dumbass sometimes, you know that?”

Phil’s stared at her in shock. “What?”

“You do understand that Britt and I agreed to their joining the party knowing full well what they thought of you, don’t you? You made it clear to them that this was a lifetime commitment. That there was no backing out. They still joined, and quite eagerly, I might add.” She leaned forward conspiratorially and lowered her voice. “Tina’s been in love with you for years, Phil. She just couldn’t show it because of her marriage and your proximity to Chuck. Whatever magic you worked on her in bed last night just cemented her feelings.” She leaned back and let him absorb that.

Phil continued to just stare at her. “Tina? Tina was in love with me?”

“On top of that,” Reese continued, “you had a succubus fall in love with you and pledge the rest of her life to you after one night in the sack…” she trailed off. They weren’t looking at them currently, but the two young women behind Phil had visibly jerked when she’d said “succubus.” She hadn’t realized they could hear them. She maintained her expression of amused exasperation at him but lowered her voice so that only he could hear her. “I think your fans have a secret, hun. No, don’t turn around, you idiot. They reacted when I was talking about Rachel. They’re either similar in nature or are familiar with them. It might be time to go home.”

“Agreed,” he said, his voice equally low. “Without Britt, we’re pretty defenseless if they decide to try something.” Louder, he called for the check and made a show about wanting to get her home for some desert. His acting wasn’t as bad as it might’ve been, since that was something he genuinely wanted to do. Reese blushed appropriately, selling the performance. Paying, they got up and Reese immediately wrapped his arm in hers, pressing her chest into it so the whole world would know they belonged to each other. Blushing at the attention, Phil started moving them towards the door.

Neither of them had seen the blonde texting away at her phone, nor did they notice the black woman grab her by the hand to pull her to her feet and follow. They had no idea it was too late until they stepped out of the restaurant.

“Howdy, mi amigo. Long time no see,” Chuck greeted them, his eyes glowing.