“Next, I’d like to call Violetta to the stand,” I said.

“Objection, Sir Allard!”

God damn it, if I had known she was going to object to everything I wouldn’t have told her about objections in the first place. “What is it now?” I groaned.

“Why hear the words of a murderer?” Lyili flipped her hair back over her shoulder for the millionth time. “Her account of the night in question will be filled with nothing but lies crafted to save her own skin.”

“Uhh… okay, but this whole trial revolves around whether or not Violetta is actually guilty. Remember how you used to execute no questions asked?” I pointed my finger at Lyili. “If she didn’t do it, then her testimony could be uh, invaluable in finding the real killer.” Yeah, I sounded pretty confident.

Lyili locked eyes with me. “I still object.”

“…Well I object to you objecting.” Not really what I wanted my first objection to be, but I wasn’t going to put up with her shit anymore.

“Sir Allard,” Lyili sighed. “Could you please remind us of the order Sir Volk met with the group members?”

“Did you already forget? He saw Cyana first. Then Goldie. Then… Violetta.” Oh. I knew where she was going with this.

“Very good, Sir Allard. I’m glad you can piece together a timeline.” Lyili smiled, turning toward the throne. “Your majesty, wouldn’t you agree that hearing the girls in order would aid us in our understanding?”

“My, that is very thoughtful of you, Ms. Lyili,” the king said. “I, of course, would be able to understand it no matter the order presented. It, would, um, be very helpful for the audience here today, however. Please elaborate. For them, that is.” Smooth. Real smooth.

“Yes, of course, your majesty.” Lyili did a small, curtsey-like motion. “I am a very thoughtful woman.” Of course she was. I’m sure she cut off people’s heads with only their best interest in mind.

“Whatever,” I said. The order didn’t really matter. If Violetta would be able to testify later, that was good enough. “I call Cyana to the stand then.”

“Objection!”

Oh my god. “What the hell is it now?”

“Before our witness arrives, I would like to remind you of one very important fact.”

“And what’s that?”

Lyili showed me another one of her cocky smirks. “That a woman’s face is not located on their chest, Sir Allard.”

Oh god, all women really could tell.

“Best give it up, Ryley,” someone in the audience yelled. “You’re barking up the wrong tree.”

“Hey!” Someone else spoke up. “That’s offensive to Tree Demons!”

“Aw, dude…” I heard Brad’s voice. “Not cool.”

“Can we just get Cyana up here already?” I yelled, turning to the king. “You’re the judge, right? Part of your job is to keep this thing on track.”

“Huh?” The king looked like he was dozing off, god damn it. My life was hanging in the balance here. He could at least pretend to pay attention. “Ms. Lyili, please call Ms. Cyana.”

“With haste, your majesty. My blades can only wait for so long,” Lyili yelled over the rest of the room. “Approach the stand, Madam Cyana.”

I made sure to stare exclusively at Cyana’s face as she walked out from the audience to the stand.

“Hello everyone.” Cyana put her hand on her hip. “And hello… your majesty.”

“H-Hello…” the king stammered. I could practically see his schoolboy blushing, not that I had been any different. “I-It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Oh no, the pleasure… is all mine.” Cyana gave him a confident smile. “And I hope to make your day very… pleasurable, your majesty.”

The king immediately broke out into the biggest sweat I had ever seen anyone break out into. Seriously, it was like a fucking waterfall pouring down his face.

“Enough.” Yaika’s voice came out cold, her dark eyes piercing deep into my soul. “Get on with the trial.” Holy shit. If anyone was barking up the wrong tree it was Cyana.

“Uh, yes, let’s get on with it, shall we?” Lyili said. It was clear there was at least one demon that intimidated her, and it was one that was a full foot shorter and moved at the speed of a snail on an off day. “Sir Allard, if you would.”

“Huh? Oh, uh, right.” I turned to Cyana. “Please state your name and your relationship to Volk.”

“Cyana. Mr. Volk was my manager.” By the tone of her voice, I could tell she still didn’t like me. I gave zero fucks. Half the people in this room wanted to see me dead, so what was one more?

“Cyana, could you tell the court about your meeting with Volk last night at 6:00?” I asked.

Nailed the lawyer language. This could be key in saving my ass. Or rather, my neck. Whatever. The point was, the more I could get the succubi talking, the better chance I had at figuring out how someone else could have killed him.

“I already told you, it really wasn’t anything special,” Cyana sighed. “We just talked about a change is choreography for an upcoming show. That was it.”

“Okay, and what time did that finish?”

“6:20 on the dot,” Cyana sounded like a teenager explaining to her parents where she had been all night. “I know, because I always watch ‘Demon Star Search’ at 6:30. I made sure the meeting ended on time.”

If she was going to be like that, I would give her a reason to be annoyed. “Do you have any proof that you actually watched it?”

She raised one of her eyebrows. “Excuse me?”

“I’m saying, how do I know you weren’t doing something else from 6:30 to 7:00?”

Cyana clenched her teeth. “What? Do I need to tell you who won last night’s show or something?”

“Sorry, but that’s not going to cut it.”

Lyili spoke up. “Are you bothering the witness for a reason?”

“Let me as you a question.” I looked at the naked prosecutor, but at her face this time. Honest. “Do you know who won ‘Demon Star Search’ last night?”

Lyili glared at me. “I don’t watch such nonsense.”

“I didn’t ask if you watch it. I asked if you know who won.”

“I… may have seen something about it in this morning’s paper, yes.”

“Oh! I get it!” Yaika said. “Ryley did a thing, father.”

“Uh, yes…” The king nodded his sweat-drenched head. “He… definitely did a thing.” This was the one that would decide if I would live or die. Cool.

“I see the princess understands what I’m getting at,” I continued. “You could have taped the show. You could have heard about it from someone else. Or… you could have seen it in the paper, just like our prosecutor did this morning.”

“Whoa!” Someone in the audience said. “Did Cyana seriously do it?” Everyone started to go ballistic.

I breathed a sigh of relief. I didn’t actually know if newspapers or magazines even existed in this world. If Lyili had said that she didn’t know the winner, I would have looked like a complete idiot. Somehow, I had managed to plant the seed of doubt in everyone’s minds.

“Silence!” Lyili slammed her fist on her table and everyone immediately stopped like they had been frozen in time. “Fools. You so easily let this man’s silver tongue lead you astray?”

“…Huh?”

“Proof.” Lyili held out her hand. “Where is your proof that Madam Cyana did not watch her program last night?”

“Uhh…” Fuck. I… hadn’t really gotten that far in my thinking yet. “I mean, uh… According to Rayne, Cyana went to the bathroom once at 6:45. She could have gone into Volk’s office, couldn’t she?”

“Sir Allard, how many nails do you intend to hammer into your own coffin?” Lyili flipped her hair. “Might I remind you that at 6:45, the one inside of Volk’s office was none other than Madam Violetta.”

Everyone in the room looked at the head of magenta hair sticking out from the hole of the guillotine. Yeah… this may have backfired a little.

“Madam Violetta.” Lyili smiled. “If I may ask, did anyone enter Sir Volk’s office during your meeting together?”

“No, ma’am,” Violetta said, her voice full of pep. “No one came in or knocked or anything!”

“There.” Lyili’s eyes were on me again. “You’ve heard it from her yourself.”

“Allard!” Minzfel screamed and the crowd burst into chaos.

“So Violetta really did do it?” Someone spoke in a gurgling voice.

“All my Violetta fanfiction…”

“You suck, Ryley!”

Yeah. I sucked.