Oh, there're sober Crab's aplenty,

And seals of barely twenty,

There are squids of over ninety

That have never yet kissed a God.

But give me a ramblin' Crabby,

With a Princess that's not too shabby.

And an Aspect that's not too flabby

And together we'll rule the world.

I've roamed through all the planes

Fought demons subterrain,

And enjoyed the blood floodplains

Where the devils, did prove kind.

And when mortals were no pleasure,

I've searched for gold and treasure

Yet Sir Crabby does out measure

My worth in divine mind.

-- Ramblin' Crabby, Songs of the Divine. Latest hit from Pinniped, [Bard] and [High Priest] of Toriana, Goddess of Charisma. AC 1750

I crawl out of the exit shaft and into open air. I'm still exhausted from my sprint through the murder lights and then the subsequent shock of dealing with INVISIBLE murder lights. I pant, trying to catch my breath.

*phew*

'ding'

**********************************

Congratulations!

Through pushing your physical limits you have improved your physical capability!

+1 DEX

[Coast II] - 8 is now level 9!

[Mana Sense II] - 2 is now level 3!

**********************************

Neat!

So it's not just combat and training that can help, working through something like the trapped shaft will also improve my physical abilities. Although, I'd much rather not have the stakes be so high... Moving forward! What's going on around here?

Looking around, I see that I'm still in the dungeon, yet something is different. Where before there was only one way to go through the pathways, here I'm being offered choices. Shaking off the water clinging to my carapace, I move forward into an open area. Six doors line up in a row in front of me, carved images hewn into their surface. I look down the line and in order I see:

A crab lifting a rock. A bleeding crab. A flying crab. A judge crab with measuring scales. A crab reading a book. And two crabs kissing.

I don't focus too much on that last image... It seems a bit vulgar. I blush, thinking of Toriana...

No Crabby! It'll never work! Move on!

...

......

And besides even if she LIKED liked me, she's as old as the Multiverse. That'd be like crab robbing or something...

I use my claws to slap some sense into myself and try to figure out what the carvings mean. Thoughts of Toriana casually drifting up into my awareness before being struck down with a mental claw finally give me the clue I need.

"It's the stats! Strength, vitality, dexterity, wisdom, intelligence and... charisma."

*blushes*

Any who! I figured out what the images show, but what do they mean? I have six choices here, what's the right path? Is it a test? Do I have to pick the one I'm highest in? I pull up my status.

'status'

Character Screen Name: Sir Crabby McCrabbington I Age: 8 Months Level: 3 Class: Apprentice of the Coasts Race: Elemental Crab Titles: Triumvirate Unveiled, Kiss from a Crab, Luck of the Crab, Lore Contributer II, Bridge Between Health: 50/50 H-Regen: 0.05/sec Mana: 12/200 M-Regen: 0.22/sec Stamina: 37/160 S-Regen: 0.16/sec Basic Stats Strength: 7 Wisdom: 22 Vitality: 9 (-4) Intelligence: 20 Dexterity: 13 (-2) Charisma: 19 More...

If that's the case... well then I should pick the judge crab. But... well, if it's not just a test on my status... and rather a test like is portrayed on the images, I'd much rather read a book. Nodding, I lay down to rest, wanting to make sure my resources recovered before opening the door.

Fully recovered, I climb to my feet and walk to the door with the book. A claw placed on the image causes the door to spring open. A black portal appears in front of me, I can't see into it. Slowly, with my stalks swiveling for any danger, I move into the black.

As I pass through into the next room, the door slams shut behind me. Immediately panic starts to rise and I rush back to the door to see if it will open. My efforts are in vain. As I'm pounding on the stone, lights slowly flicker on in the room. A low *purr* sound is heard and I swing towards the noise, claws raised to attack or defend. I see a giant... cat... human... thing. I'm not exactly sure what it is, but it's huge and has a cat's body and a woman's face. That's not the concerning thing though. I can veritably feel the power drifting off the creature. I flicker my [Mana Sense] on, and am almost blinded by her radiance. We stare at each other before she speaks; her voice a high meowling pitch.

"Oh? Hello little crab. Come to take the trial of intelligence have we?"

It speaks! I'm about to respond when it continues...

"This is how it works... I give you a riddle, and you have one chance to give me the right answer. If you get it wrong, well...

Her giant head reaches down to lick her paw. When she raises it back up, a Cheshire grin is showing, giant sharp teeth flashing into a macabre smile.

"...I get to attack. Any questions?"

I think furiously, trying to figure out a plan. Then I remember something.

"How many attacks do you get to do?"

Her smile disappears, replaced by a frown.

"You're such a low level, I'm bound by the terms of my contract to only attack once. Though, I'll hardly need more than a paw to deal with you little crab."

As she speaks, claws extend from her paw. They're roughly half the length of my body, yet her words make me sigh in relief.

"Okay!"

I [coast] over to her location and take a seat right in front of her, lower body reclined so I can look up into her face.

"Ohhh.... confident are we?" she purrs.

"Alright then little crab... What is always in front of you but can't be seen?"

Hmm.

I look down in front of me. Well I have my claws here, I can see those. Wait! I got it!

"My legs!"

...

......

"What?"

"Yep! I mean, I can *kind* of see them with [Mana Sense], but not with my eyes you know? They're so far out to the side, and I think us crabs are designed to look up and forward and all that. Peripheral vision is hard!"

*WHAM!!*

I don't even see her move before [Luck of the Crab] activates and I'm dragged backwards; her paw slamming into the floor.

*cough cough*

I choke a bit from the dust raised by the strike.

"Well! I guess I'll have to try again tomorrow!"

I start to [coast] back over to the door, away from the giant cat person thing when she says,

"Wait..."

I turn back, and see her standing there with her paw in the air, a confused look on her face.

"What just happened?"

I raise a claw and wave it at her,

"I can [Dodge] one attack a day that would kill me! So, I'm just going to try again tomorrow. I'll be over here doing some training."

Her perplexed gaze follows me as I [coast] out of her reach.

'time passes...

♫♫♫"La dee da da... Feel the magic... Fear the Claws... Sir Crabby is loose!"♫♫♫

*rock wobbles slowly in the air*

♫♫♫"I like to eat, eat, eat Crabby's and banana's."♫♫♫

*rock wobbles slowly back to me*

♫♫♫"Sir, Sir, Sir Crabby!"♫♫♫

*rock wobbles slowly in the air*

A screeching *yowl* interrupts my concentration. I turn to look at the cat person thing and see her hunched down, paws covering her ears. She looks miserable as she says,

"For the love of Wisdom! It's been eight hours! Do you know any other songs besides those two?"

I raise a claw to my chin, considering.

"Nope! That's all I got for now!"

I turn back to my rock,

♫♫♫"Feel the magic, fear the claws..."♫♫♫

"Look! Look, I'll make a deal with you. I can't force you to answer until you're ready. But I can give you..."

I can see her visibly *gulp* as an expression of pain passes on her face,

"...I can give you two chances to answer the riddle! Just please for the love of Wisdom stop singing."

I huff a bit, offended. My voice isn't that bad. Better not to antagonize the giant murder cat though.

"Okay..." I grumble, "I guess..."

I go back to training, waiting for a day to pass.

Under my breath though...

♫♫♫"Feel the magic, fear the claws..."♫♫♫

'A day passes.

I go back to the cat lady and she's sitting there, eyes red and fur sticking out. She must have not gotten any sleep. Which is strange. I mean... I didn't sleep but I was training. She should really take better care of herself.

"Okay, okay... crab. Here we go... here's the riddle. The more you take, the more you leave behind. What am I?"

Hmm.

"Love!"

Her pained and tired expression grows thoughtful for a second, "that's... a surprisingly good answer. It's not the right one though. Hmm," she muses, a pondering expression on her face.

"So! Can I pass?"

Her face grows tired and weary again,

"Unfortunately no, the contract I've signed with the dungeon requires me to only accept the right answer. Just... give me a minute."

She takes a moment, carefully thinking before saying, "Look crab, I'll give you an easier one okay? I want you to think REALLY hard about this."

I nod, letting her know I'm ready.

"Okay, here's the riddle. What do you call a cat that loves to swim?"

Oh... this is a tough one. I don't really know anything about cat's. I know a bit about swimming though! I ponder, well it looks like cats shouldn't really like swimming. They have fur and all that. Fish are better swimmers. Hmm... oh wait!

"Is it a catfish?"

I see her slump exhaustedly. Strange, she looks really relieved. She must have gotten tired thinking of all those riddles.

"Oh, thank Wisdom," she muttered. "Yes, yes crab the answer is catfish."

"YES!" I wave my claws in delight and [coast] around the room.

"Okay, okay very exciting. I'm glad you came, now please exit the door behind me to the boss room."

I stop, my arms still raised.

"Boss room?"

"Yes, the floor boss is right behind me. Move along now."

I lower my arms as I consider her words. This might be a big fight. I nod and prepare to head out. As I walk to the door I hear one last thing,

"And crab? If... if you go any further, be careful. I don't know what it is but there's... there's something wrong happening down there."

I turn back and see her with a worried expression. I nod, appreciating the concern for what it was. I wave a final goodbye as I say,

"Okay! Have a good time murder cat lady!"

As I open the door and prepare for battle, I hear a low purr as I leave. I put it out of my mind as she murmurs exasperatedly,

"I'm a bloody sphinx."