My group and I were guided by armed men deeper and deeper into the cathedral. I assumed that people of Aon take lost items very seriously that they keep anything found in the deepest treasuries.

When we were lead to the Chamber of Cardinals, I thought that people of Aon were crazy serious about their lost and found system.

We walked onto the middle of the room, we were surrounded by more armed men and some guys with pointy hats sitting on tables that might as well double as a small tower.

“So...ugh...anyways. About the lost dagger...” I began.

“You unfaithful dogs! You should wait for the Grand Cardinal to give you permission to talk!” One of the angry armed mob shouted.

All of the people surrounding us started to approaching us menacingly before being stopped by the one called the Grand Cardinal.

“Enough. We are here to talk. You must be the one named ‘Boz’, is that right?” The Grand Cardinal asked me.

“Boz? No, that’s not my name. My name is…” Sarjay interrupted me before I could introduce myself.

“You pointed-hat elderlies, give us our dagger back!” Sarjay demanded. By now, the flames are starting to leak from the gaps of his armor.

“The dagger. So you really are the owner of the dagger, Boz. As well as the coins,” The Grand Cardinal said as he tossed a coin towards me. I caught the coin and observed it. It appeared to be the coins we were giving out.

“Er...boss, you think they found out that we’re using fun money that’s just used for our inside gambling?” Daggerless whispered to me.

“Yes, we are the owners of the coins. Are we in trouble because of this?” I asked as I sweated bullets imaginarily.

“Of course, you’re in great trouble. You infiltrated the city, went around unnoticed and caused a massive schism. And you still had the guts to come to the strongest men in Aon,” The Grand Cardinal explained.

“Schism?” I asked.

“Yes. You caused a great unrest among my fellow brothers and sisters who walk upon the Path. With a simple problem as to how to pronounce Aon. I have without a doubt, believe that you are here to simply get to the miasma of death that is at the center of Aon to achieve the powers of immortality through becoming a lich!” The Grand Cardinal elaborated.

Pronounced? Miasma of death? I turned to my companions looking for explanation. Most of them shrugged.

“Boss, didn’t you asked how to pronounce Aon earlier?” Daggerless asked me.

Now that I thought about it, I did. It was just a simple question. I placed my hand on my chin and thought. I looked at the banner covering the Grand Cardinal’s table. On it were familiar characters.

So far, the language spoken in Aon seemed familiar but alien to my companions and I. We even had trouble reading most of the time. Sarjay suggested that languages develop over the time and the language in Aon could also had been a derivation of the Common we knew.

But the characters on the banner were familiar. I am starting to remember Aon bit by bit but for some reason, not in the reason I would to.

“Isn’t that pronounced A-on? As in ‘A’ then ‘On’? Judging from the characters on that banner,” I pointed it out.

The other old men on the tables started to talk among themselves while nodding. Even the Inquisitors were nodding among each other.

“That….now that I thought about it. Indeed, by how did you know? Why do you know Ancient Commons? It’s a language that’s been dead for centuries that even I, the Grand Cardinal, had trouble studying. In fact, isn’t your accent a bit odd?” The Grand Cardinal remarked.

My accent is odd? His accent is the one that’s weird! My skull is cracking just decoding what he’s saying. Also, in regards to what he said, Ancient Commons? Commons is dead? The language spoken by everyone in the entire continent and beyond was dead?!

“Blah, blah, blah. Quit talking and give us the dagger already, old man! Or you’ll get hurt!” Sarjay threatened.

“He threatened his Holiness, everyone, attack!” One of the high ranking Inquisitors ordered. Groups of men started charging at us in waves.

I enjoy the calm and carefree Sarjay. The serious Sarjay was foul mouthed and literally hot-headed. Most of the time negotiations break down much more easily when Sarjay is pissed.

My companions prepared their combat stance. They surrounded me and drew their weapon to protect me. I sighed as I liked being a negotiator more than a fighter. I guess we’ll knock these guys out and continue our talk. It appeared that even the Grand Cardinal was telling them to stop.

I raised my arms and opened my palms. I rotated my hands and raised them, giving a form of command to the ground to rise. The stone floor cracked and chunks of the floor sprouted out, forming walls, throwing some Inquisitors to the air and directly knocking out some.

Some of the Inquisitors paced around the walls and drew their crossbows at us. Their well-spunned strings launching viciously, pelting silver bolts at us.

I clenched my fist as if crushing a fruit and many of the bolts were crushed. Any bolts I did not crush, my companions blocked them with their weapons and shields. The Inquisitors were well-trained and fast. Once they were close enough, some of the lightly armored ones leapt at us with spears, while the heavier ones threw their crossed javelins at us to support the wave of attack.

Like a conductor in an orchestra, I could hear music being played. I swung my hands, doing waves. I would lose myself into dementia whenever I cast my spells. The highest levels of spells could not be comprehended by mortal immature minds. But as I was beyond death, I’ve learnt ways to cope with dealing and understanding these nearly divine power.

You had to sacrifice something in return for using these power. For simpler spells, you simply exert yourself. But as you push further, you go over the thread between life and death, and dive deeper.

The ecstasy started to flood my sense. The brightness of the light amplifying and time started to slow down. These spells were drugs to me. They intoxicated me and tried to control me.

However, I had a thousand years to do my homework. I mastered them until the spells stopped controlling me. I started whipping the spells to do my bidding instead of the other way around. The spirits began to obey me as I slowly showed my dominance.

A ball of fire was thrown at us and I faced my palm towards it. The ball slammed into an invisible wall and its fire curved around us, scarring the floor around us. By now there were a lot of Inquisitors surrounding us.

With a snap of my finger, I thinned the air around me. The Inquisitors who were too close to us started to gasp for air as the pressure of the area decreased. I decreased the breathing air only to the point that would render normal people unconscious. Unfortunately for me, it seems these Inquisitors weren’t normal people. They were battle junkies.

The lack of air only increased their fighting ferocity. The spears clashed against my companion’s weapons. Sarjay’s burning sword landed on someone’s side then swung him around, knocking two more.

One of my companion’s shield bashed against a knight’s helmet and he got knocked out cold. Another one of my companion slugged an Inquisitor with a lead ball from his sling. A mace struck one of my companions but it had no effect on him as his armor just deflected the hit. Dumbfounded, the Inquisitor got his face caved in by a fist.

The Inquisitors realized their attacks were futile and started making space between us and them. There were bodies lying around my companions and I, counting around thirty. I could tell some of them were knocked out, but I couldn’t tell the other’s conditions.

I’m usually one that prefers if they don’t get killed but I’m also impartial to people if they die. It’s just a shame if they die for something as stupid as a misunderstanding.

With the Inquisitors backing off now, the Grand Cardinal made his word clear and commanded everyone to cease fighting.

“It is clear that you all are extremely strong. And yet, I don’t exactly feel any intentions to attack us. Except for that knight that’s on fire,” The Grand Cardinal pointed out.

“We should talk like civilized men. I apologize for my men’s behaviors. They shall be reprimanded. Now, back to my question, how do you know Ancient Commons?” He asked.

Though the Grand Cardinal said that, the companions were still unhinged from their stance. I was the only one the relaxed. I didn’t order my companions because it’s just their nature to not follow my orders.

“It’s the language I speak. At least, back in my homeland,” I answered.

“Your homeland? I do not recall any countries in this continent speaking Ancient Commons, is your homeland far? Why do they speak the language of the ancient scripture?” The old man inquired further.

“No. I can’t tell you more than that. By the way, what do you mean attaining immortality by becoming a lich?” I asked.

“Wait, so you did not know about the miasma of death within Aon?” He asked back baffled.

Miasma of death? I could indeed sense the essence of death lingering around, but why is it so strong in this holy city known for the hatred of the undead?

I kept thinking. What could it be? It’s stuck at the corner of my skull but I simply couldn’t put my finger on it.

By now, my companions were starting to relax, but not sheathing their weapons. One of my companions came up to me and whispered at me, “Boss, I just realized something bad.”

“What is it?” I asked him.

“Do you remember the first time chef Maven cooked?”

“Oh yeah, it was so terrible that we had to build a sewer going to a river so we could dump the...wait.” It all clicked together. I looked at my cook who was carrying her sword. She turned to me and signalled, ‘What’s up, boss?’

A thousand years ago, when we became the undead, my chef aspired to become the best cook in the entire continent since she was essentially immortal, she could be a walking cookbook. I thought it was strange but we realized we had a sense of taste, contrary to what most researches on undead claimed. The food would burn in bright flame when it entered our mouth and we could taste the food even though we had no need for sustenance.

But Maven was so bad at cooking that for centuries, we simply dumped the food somewhere every time she failed her cooking. That’s also how Rookie the abomination came to life.

Eventually, we got tired of the rotting food just lying around that we made a sewer system that lead far from the stronghold into a river called Aon. Maven was distraught when she found out that we made a sewer system but it only motivated her to try harder.

After centuries of practice and wastage of food, Maven perfected her cooking and her meals became some of the best things to eat to pass the time and occasionally enjoy mortal desires. Although, that could also be why the area around the stronghold was devoid of life.

Back to the sewer, the problem was the smell that came from the rotting food that made its way to the river. We built it way deep inside the river but it still stank. Even though it’s extremely far from the stronghold, if a kingdom got so mad about the smell, they’d probably do anything to find the source of smell.

So I built an extremely large air freshener (branded by Undead Stronghold Cleaners™) to keep the smell away. Only did centuries later I realized that I installed a huge block of undead version of catnip instead. However, I was too lazy to move out of the stronghold to fix it so I just let it be.

I did not realize that the sewage dump eventually became a city. The rotting food probably mixed up and slowly turned into a sludge of toxic waste. Moreover, spirits of angry animals who were killed only to be turned into trashy meals with no taste was mixed into the toxic waste and created the miasma of death the Grand Cardinal was talking about. Look, if your cooking was so bad that spirits of animals got angry enough to make the undead stronger, you’ve got a problem.

It would be extremely embarrassing for this city and the people who follow this religion to learn that they’ve been living on top of a waste disposal for centuries and that the water they drink and bath were of questionable nature.

I wondered. I remembered the story that were told to me over and over again about the waters. They said that a hero killed the Three Liches by splashing them with holy water. I just felt like the hero got lucky and scooped up some toxic and accidentally caused the liches to taste Maven’s cooking.

Poor liches. I hope you find peace in the afterlife.

I started thinking how I could bullshit my way out without telling the people of Aon they’ve been drinking toxic waste. Sarjay can’t be relied on at the moment as he’s currently on berserk state.

The gears started to turn within my mind, formulating the most elaborate bullshit I could think of to get out of this situation.

First, I need to convince these guys, the cardinals, to let me see the source of miasma. Secondly, I need to cleanse the water. And thirdly, I need remove that undead catnip, if it still exists.

“Brothers and sisters of the Path. Can’t you tell? We’re sent by the Goddess to cleanse the waters of Aon for good!” I started spouting. My teeths are chattering and my knees were weak. I hope this works. If it does, it’ll be the greatest prank in the continent.

“Are you serious? You can’t be...wait...you speak Ancient Common, hold the mark of the beacon of Aon, and have extremely strong divine powers. Could it be? You’re one of the Lords in the Heavens?!” The Grand Cardinal was ecstatic.

“Lord of the what? I mean, yes! I am one of the Lords in the Heavens! Behold my...angels!” I pointed at my companions and continued, ”We had come from the heavens and now I am demoted to Lords in the Grounds! But I seek to regain my position by cleansing the bath of our Mother, the Goddess herself!” I announced.

All the Inquisitors were shocked and dumbfounded. The cardinals, who were constantly whispering among themselves, were also silent. After a while all the Inquisitors bowed, begging for forgiveness from us.

“Wait! To be sure, I will need to use the greatest holy spell to determine whether you are speaking the truth for you could also be a Demon God in disguise!” The Grand Cardinal exclaimed.

“Yes, of course, wait, what?” Before I could even respond, the Grand Cardinal drowned us in a shower of bright light. The entire room shined up and from the ceiling, dragons that were made of bright yellow light dived straight onto us. However, nothing happened. The dragons simply went through all of us and through the floor.

After the spell ended, my companions and I patted ourselves and realized we were unharmed. That was strange. Did his holy magic failed to work? Our clothes were steaming a bit, but other than that, we were fine.

The Grand Cardinal held his breathe then bowed, “My apologize, Lord in the Heavens! This lowly servant had doubted you!”

Well, whether the magic worked or not, it doesn’t matter. All it mattered was that we managed to fool them.

“Nice going, Boss,” Daggerless commented.

“I forgive all of you as Lord in the Grounds! Now, bring me to the source of the miasma so I could..er...gain my position back!” I ordered.

“Also, can you ask for my dagger?” Daggerless asked.