《Everyone's a Catgirl!》Chapter 28: Drawing Legs on a Snake
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Ravyn took us through a winding path of streets and alleyways. Catgirl children watched curiously along the way, sometimes following us for several blocks before disappearing into the darkness. Whispers of ill intent would reach my ear at times, and Ravyn made it a point to ignore them, insisting they were traps laid out by clever girls in their prime to persuade travelers into dark corners.
“How does such a big city have such an awful homeless issue?” asked Keke.
“I don’t know. Unfortunately, that’s pretty common,” I said back.
“You lived somewhere like this?” Cannoli asked with wide eyes.
“Sort of. The buildings weren’t shaped like this. The streets were smooth and black, and they were surrounded by tall buildings called skyscrapers.” I stopped for a second when Ravyn barred us with her arm. She sniffed at the air, then shook her head and continued onward. “They would reach much higher than some of these buildings.”
“Whoa. Taller than these?” Cannoli gestured to one of the taller pagodas as we passed. “How do they do that? Make them that tall?”
I smiled. “I don’t really know for sure. Strong materials and good foundations, I think. But the big city is overrated. It’s filled with dark alleyways like these.”
“So, then, your ‘big city.’ It’s dangerous?”
“Yeah, if you’re careless. The only way you learn your way around it is through experience. Gotta get the street smarts necessary to live out there.”
“Um, what’s a ‘street smart’? Is that like a Stat?”
I laughed. “You’re awfully curious tonight. Are we playing twenty questions?” The blank stares reminded me that sometimes the same jokes wouldn’t hit. “Right, confusing joke. Sorry.”
“Street smarts are more like a learned Skill,” Ravyn interjected, surprising us all. “It’s knowing how to best survive in the more dangerous parts of a city.”
Interesting. “Yeah. What she said.”
Keke hummed and continued as if Ravyn hadn’t said anything. “Cannoli’s right to ask questions, though. You know where we’re from, but we don’t know much about you.”
“Trust me. The place I come from isn’t half as interesting as this one,” I said, shaking my head, “I don’t miss anything about it.”
“I’m sure you miss something about it,” Cannoli insisted.
I had to think about it for some time. There were a few things here and there that I missed. Like my cell phone, the convenience of the internet, how I could just pop something in the microwave for dinner—little luxuries I’d taken for granted. It took some time, and then I remembered.
“Oh yeah. Cars.”
“Cars?” Cannoli repeated.
“Yeah. So remember those streets I mentioned? You could get into these big metal boxes, and—” A thought occurred to me then. They had no idea what a car was. I could spin this into a much more interesting tale. “Sorry. So as I was saying, they were metal boxes. Except, as many as four or more people could get inside at a time.”
“Why would you do that? Get into a box?” asked Keke, her gaze just as intense as Cannoli’s.
“Because they could go fast. Fast as lightning. And they used a system of explosions to propel the car forward. They made all kinds of cars, too—big ones, small ones, some as big as your house. Fancy ones, simple ones. If you could think it, they could make it.”
“Uwaah?” Keke and Cannoli gasped in unison.
“Did you have a favorite?” Cannoli asked.
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I had to pause, but only for a moment. “Yeah, a Mercedes-Benz SLR McLaren.” The Red Gold Dream was just under ten million bucks last I checked.
“We’re here,” said an evidently irritated Ravyn. “If you’re all done chatting, let’s go inside.” Ravyn descended a dark staircase before us without so much as a flinch.
“She definitely has the street smarts,” Cannoli mumbled.
Keke and Cannoli each took one of my arms and took careful steps with me as we made our way down the stairs. Keke pushed my head down at one point, forcing me out of the way of an arch I nearly ran into. Seconds later, we stood at a dilapidated door with one of those old iron rings for a door handle.
Ravyn knocked at the door thrice. A moment later, she knocked twice, waited another few seconds, then knocked thrice once more. The door creaked open, and Ravyn waved us in. “Come on.”
“Where are we?” I whispered.
“Welcome to the—”
“Thrice Lucky—”
“Herb Emporium.”
Before us were three catgirls of identical appearance. Each of them bore shoulder-length hair of a different color, and wore a short, silk jacket held together by three large, golden buttons. They performed a unified half-bow—like the ones I’d see from old Kung Fu movies—and extended their arms further into the shop.
“Please—”
“Take—”
“Your time.”
Each of the girls took turns completing the sentences they spoke, and Ravyn rolled her eyes, welcoming herself in with a wave of her hand. “Eck. Stop with that creepy shit. It’s giving me goosebumps.”
“Why, Ravyn, long time,” the red-haired one started.
“No see,” the blue-haired one finished.
“Triplets!” Cannoli said wide-eyed. Without any sort of respect for personal space, she approached the closest one—the one with red hair—and took the girls’ hands into her own. Her stare shifted between each of the girls like a child who couldn’t pick out what toy they wanted from the store. “That’s what you are, right?”
“Yes,” the red one replied.
“We are,” the blue one said.
“As you say,” the green one continued.
“Triplets,” they said in unison.
“That is kind of spooky,” muttered Keke.
She had been standing behind me the entire time. I flashed an encouraging smile and gestured for her to pass me. Her gaze met mine, and the sensation of her fingers interlocking with mine paralyzed me on the spot.
“Oh my,” the red one said, glancing at Keke and me through half-closed eyes, “we have one in love.”
Keke and I were quick to let go of each other’s hands.
Cannoli didn’t seem any the wiser. “Nyah?” Her face went pink. “N-not me!”
The red one giggled. “Not yet, maybe. Soon perhaps. There is a man in your company.”
“A man who may require our services,” the blue one said with a smile.
“A service only we can provide,” said the green one.
“Hey, Sugar. How about some service over here,” Ravyn said with a hint of irritation as she snapped her fingers.
I wondered what had her on edge. She seemed just short of blowing a fuse. Cailu didn’t upset her nearly this badly the last time we ran into him. Is that really it?
“Yes, ma’am,” said the red one. She gracefully parted from Cannoli and made her way behind a counter tucked away in a barely visible spot behind the iron cages, shelves, and bottles surrounding us.
“What’s your name?” Cannoli asked the blue one.
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“I am Nice.”
I frowned. “Your name is Nice? Like, as in the word ‘Nice?’”
Nice nodded. “Yes. That is correct.”
“So, hold on just a moment. Her name is Sugar?”
“Yes,” said Nice.
I snapped my fingers and confidently pointed to the green-haired one. “You’re Spice, aren’t you?”
She shook her head. “No. I am Dice.”
My mouth hung open, utterly defeated by what I was sure was the last ingredient for the perfect girl. “If I were named Spice, our customers would be confused. Seeing as this is a spice shop. What would we retrieve if they requested ‘Spice’?”
But Nice is perfectly acceptable. Okay then.
“Well, moving along. Besides spices, what else do you sell here?”
“Look around,” said Dice. Her voice was monotone and the most soft-spoken of them all. She held her arms out at her sides. “Trust your senses, and we’ll do the rest.” With that, Dice walked away with her arms behind her, turning the nearest corner to our left.
Keke took to Cannoli’s side, asking Nice, “Did you know we were coming?”
Nice smiled. “Why yes.” Of the three sisters, her voice carried the creepiest tone to it. Every time she spoke, it felt like the words were part of some dark incantation. “We practice many arts of magic. We know when our customers are coming.” She eyed me up and down, then smacked her lips. Under normal circumstances, that would’ve been a turn-on. Not so much here. “And what they most desire.”
“Hey, hands off,” Keke said, standing in front of me. “He’s m-m—”
Hey, Keke, what are you doing? Don’t!
Nice smiled a most sinister and knowing smile. “I know what I need to know.”
“Hey, Matt! Get your ass over here and help me pick a few out!” cried Ravyn. “Ain’t doing this alone.”
“Move your ass! Move your ass!” squawked Ball.
“It seems she requires you. If you require me,” Nice said, passing another look up and down my frame, “I won’t be but a whisper away.” She bowed and exited around the same corner Spice did earlier.
“Better go see what Ravyn wants,” I said to the girls.
“We’ll be browsing!” said the excited Cannoli. She locked her arm around Keke’s and wore a magnificent smile. “Come on, Keke!”
“Uh, y-yeah!” As Keke was tugged away, I watched her silently mouthed the words, ‘I’m sorry.’
I waved to them as they disappeared somewhere down a hall to my right, then made my way over to where Ravyn and Sugar were talking. “Okay, so what’s the plan?”
“We’re going to get tea leaves and all the spices that improve them,” Ravyn said, pointing to another bottle on the shelf behind Sugar. “Let me see that one.”
“I’m glad I can pay for this one.” I moved to retrieve the bag Cailu forced on me.
“Don’t. I refuse to use tainted coin,” Ravyn snapped. “I’ve got this. Don’t worry about it.” Ravyn took the glass jar from Sugar and studied the contents on the back.
“What about knowing how to brew it?”
“Was my brew not good enough?”
“No, it was. That’s not it. It’s just—”
“Then help me pick. What kind of flavors do you like?” Ravyn handed the jar back to Sugar and pointed at several other spices, mumbling numbers and incoherent words to herself.
“Cinnamon? Ap—nyapple.”
“Nyapple cinnamon. I can work with that. What else?”
“She’s a bit bossy, don’t you think?” Sugar flashed a concerned smile. “Unless you’re into that.”
Heat rose to my face. “No, I’m not into that.”
“You’re missing out,” mused Ravyn.
I chose to ignore the comment and carried on selecting spice after spice on the rack. There were flavors and colors I’d never seen before, and it reminded me a lot of the Mediterranean shops I visited a few times with my mom. After my nose was numb from sniffing so many jars, I took a moment to count each bottle, bag, and pouch.
“Hey, Ravyn, there’s fifteen items here. We don’t need this much.”
“Do you want to get back on a boat in a month just to do it again?” she asked dryly while counting out the coins in her [Cat Pack].
“Well, no. But this feels a little overkill. I can just take it a bit easier, so I’m not blowing through my [Energy] every time we want to do something.”
“We’ll never get anything done that way. I’ll put them in my [Cat Pack], so don’t worry about carrying them.” Ravyn counted a few last coins in her palm and handed them to Sugar. “That should cover it.”
“You’re always a great customer, Ravyn! Thank you for your purr-chase!” Sugar pocketed the coins and left behind a door next to the shopkeep. “I just need to put this in the safe. One moment, please!” she said as she shut the door behind her.
A moment of silence passed between us.
“Thanks, Ravyn.” I put a hand on her shoulder, and I was amazed at how soft her skin was. Even softer than Keke or Cannoli. “I mean it.”
Ravyn paused and put a hand on mine. “Don’t.”
Before she could bat my arm away, I got the hint and took my hand off her shoulder. “I’m sorry, I meant it in a friendly way.”
“I know how you meant it. Don’t.”
“Hey, look at this!” came Cannoli’s voice. Cradled in her arms was a glass cage containing a green reptile about the size of my hand—like a cross between a lizard and a bearded dragon. The lizard licked one of its eyeballs with a long pink tongue and tilted its head. I couldn’t help but smile at the little dude and wiggle one of my fingers in front of the cage.
I’m glad it was in a cage. Suddenly, a blaze erupted from the inside, coating the clear walls in orange flame. It was instantaneous but enough to startle me. I withdrew my hand in a panic and gasped.
“It’s just a blazard. Never seen one?” said Keke.
“I have now,” I said as I tried to calm myself down.
“Keh, pfft, hahaha. Oh, the look on your face.” Ravyn cackled and slapped her knee.
“Can we keep him? Please?” Cannoli’s eyes were full of wonder and amazement. She’d found her new best friend, and I was going to have to be the one to tell her no.
“Wouldn’t it be difficult to travel with a pet?” I scratched the back of my neck.
“You can teach them to follow you. Kind of like Ball does.” Keke shrugged. “And they can fight if they’re strong enough.”
“How are we going to pay for it?”
Cannoli’s pleading eyes shot to my [Cat Pack], then back to my face.
I sighed and dug the Bells from my pack.
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