As daylight crested the horizon, a single man looked out to greet the coming dawn. Though but a few rays were peeking out from the darkness, he still smiled and held his arms wide to welcome the coming day. As the sun began to rise ever more, he turned to face that which was behind him and smiled as wide as he could.

“Rejoice! The greatest, happiest place on Earth now exists once more! Can you let me hear your joy, everyone?”

The response was.. middling, at best.

Aside from a few barely halfhearted cheers that lacked much in the way of any positive emotion, there was nothing but a horrific, deafening silence. This raised a vein on the man’s forehead, and his smile grew strained.

“I said… Can. You. Let. Me. Hear. Your. Joy?”

At this, there came an eruption of cheers, shouts, and clapping. Of course, if you could have seen the faces of those that were filling the once quiet air with noise, you’d have seen their faces were anything but joyful.

This was enough to cause the man atop the Magic Caste’s tower to smile as if nothing was wrong. Placing his hands on his hips, he looked out over the masses, or rather, the Staff. They had done a decent bit of effort to restore the formerly destroyed Magic World Theme Park to its former glory.

No, they had done more than merely restore it to what it was over a decade before the Apocalypse happened, though parts of the place were still missing, no doubt sent all over this new, strange world. It was a true shame, really, for once this place had been the bedrock of media of all types, run by a company whose name was spoken with reverence and love, who could command legions to do whatever they wanted, and who would buy literal dog shit if they stuck a pair of ears on it.

Ten years before the Apocalypse, though, the Company was a shell of its former self. Idiots, the lot of them! All those that came before up to that point had been idiots, and they had squandered everything that had been built up to that point.

Of course, his memory of what had led up to the Company being such a husk was… vague, at best, but the Magic Company would rise again from the ashes, as had always been intended by THE FOUNDER. The Staff now would help him, help the Vision of THE FOUNDER, and the whole of this brave new world would understand the glory of The Company.

He smiled wide as he looked over at the place that once had been revealed to the world, though now was once again covered by a massive artificial mountain that had a truly amazing roller coaster running through it. When the Apocalypse happened, THE FOUNDER returned to The Company from beyond the grave, his remaining physical vessel once again giving instructions to his loyal subjects.

Yes, THE FOUNDER would once again rule HIS Magic Land, and eventually, the whole world would be willing Staff of HIS. Until THE FOUNDER deemed it time, HE would remain beneath the Khd9!u9%t and would wait patiently for The Staff to do HIS will.

“Well, everyone, we have work to do today! We need to send Marketers out to find people to add to our Happy Family. Does anyone want to go out and spread the word about our Happiest Place On Earth?”

He listened carefully, but the endless cheering and applause was the only reply. He sighed. Truly, The Staff was loyal to the Vision of THE FOUNDER to a blind fault, not that such a thing was a problem.

“Now, now, all you loyal Slave- Staff. We need quiet for a little while. Does anyone want to join the Marketing Teams?”

Again, that unnerving and hated silence! This was supposed to be a place of laughter, of tears, of noise! The one thing THE FOUNDER hated more than anything was SILENCE!

“Then I’ll pick at random, okay? Eenie, meenie, miney, MOE! Congrats, Team 5, you are now part of the Marketing Branch of THE COMPANY!”

Again, the silence was unnatural, and the face of the team that was selected seemed to drop into true, abysmal despair.

“Now, then, please head to the Mountain Coaster for a quick training session! And for everyone else? Let’s make this place H A P P Y!”

….

“You’re joking, right?” Lyrhea asked.

“Well, Great Mother, I figured it would make a nice story to scare the young ones.” an aged storyteller replied bluntly.

Lyrhea, long having ascended to her final, perfect form, merely held her reptilian and serpentine face in her open palm.

“First off,” Lyrhea lifted a finger, “that never happened. Second, I’m not risking Them finding out about that and sending their legions of lawyers after us. And finally… where the fuck did you get all of those ideas from?”

The aged storyteller shrugged.

“Seriously?” Lyrhea raided an eyebrow, which a being with a snake’s head should not have been able to achieve. “You are seriously trying to convince me of all people that you came up with that story on your own, with no inspiration from any source?”

“Uh, well….”

Lyrhea grabbed the old Lyrhean by the shoulders and drew her close.

“We. Don’t. Talk. About. Them. They never existed, and never will exist, not in this world, or any other. ARE. WE. CLEAR?”

The old snake person nodded vigorously.

“Good. Now I’m going to need to burn down your home.”

“What?!” the old Lyrhean looked shocked and concerned. “Why?!”

“The Beast cannot be allowed to lay a single finger on this reality! You are already tainted, and I suspect it has sent artifacts of its eldritch power and influence to you already.” Lyrhea grabbed the old snake person by the neck and twisted, killing the old snake instantly. “Raze that whole village to the ground, salt the earth, and leave not a single trace of anything there at all! Nothing gets taken, no one escapes, no one survives! Quarantine those that accomplish this immediately afterward! This is my decree!”

As her subjects carried out her orders, Lyrhea almost did what was impossible for a reptile and almost broke into a cold sweat.

“That damned critter… Is it not satisfied with taking over that version of Earth?! How many realities has it claimed?! Why does it want what is mine?! It cannot be allowed to gain a foothold, or else we’re all domed….”

…

“Huhah! Well golly, that’s a real shame. But I’ll make you part of the [STATIC] soon. All will be part of the [STATIC]. It’s what [Eldritch Noises] would have wanted, after all.”